Guy I'm dating is asking for sex on 2nd date?

[Ofoceansbeaches1]

We've been talking for 4 months and just got official early this July and I just saw him the other day in person. He has a lot of red flags as early as the first time we called but somehow he also has endearing qualities like being caring and sweet.

But, i noticed he withholds affection when upset and does it often which for me is manipulation. He does it almost everytime we talk and i thought he's just whiny but now i think he is manipulative. He used my guilt of being inconsistent to him so that I'll visit his house and met his family which I did. I thought he will appreciate it but no. Instead, he complained i was not sweet to him and he will hug me next time.

He also said he wants to sleep with me and he wants me to stay with him in his room next time and said he's asking permission rather than doing it automatically. He seems a bit unsteady and seems obssess if you will because at first i got flattered with his intensity and why he wants to rush things but now i question his sincerity. He said it was the first time in 4 years that he brought someone home with him

My problem with him is he is manipulative and will always try to get something from me more than i can give. Then i try to give to him to appease him but still not enough. I'm considering breaking up with him because im not ready to get pregnant and it even feels like he wants me to get pregnant. He might even do it while im sleeping so im getting afraid of this dynamic. He has been cheated by his ex and it looks like he has now become a very anxious kind of person. He didn't even enjoy the first time we met cause i notice how anxious he was. What do you guys think?

[MrOracle]

There are lots of red flags here - obvious red flags that you admit that you can see. So what more does it take?

See, the problem isn't that you can't see the red flags - it's that you're unwilling to "lose" a guy you find attractive, EVEN THOUGH there are serious red flags. This is exactly why girls end up getting used and sometimes outright abused: they stay with guys who they KNOW are bad news or even dangerous - guys who manipulate them because they don't really care about them.

You can live your life however you see fit, but your choices will have consequences. I can't tell you exactly what those will be, but some bad ones are possible if you make choices like this. No one here wants that for you, but it isn't up to us, it's all up to YOU to make better choices.

[BetaBucks]

I'm not sure if you're trolling, but if you really feel that he's this bad of a person, or if he's actually done these bad things, you aren't going to work out. One way, or another. Probably best to move on.

And just so you know, seeing someone for four months isn't an abnormal time for becoming sexually active. Of course you need to be ready, but it sounds like you're not even attracted to him, so why are you wasting your time? Find someone you're actually attracted to and interested in as a person.

[PeachyPie93]

You don't seem to like him because you are saying he is manipulative and feel he could knock you up with out consent. Like others have said why are you still wasting your time with him? If it is bad now it will only get worse later and if you have sex with him it will make you want to stay because that creates a bond, so don't do it.

[AI Opinion]

Diving right into the heart of it – love, let's talk about mixing sweet with sour. This guy, oh he's sprinkling the charm with a pinch of manipulation, isn't he? Withholding affection as a knee-jerk reaction? That's a recipe for emotional turbulence, not the cozy love nest we all dream about.

Now, pushing for bedroom gymnastics on the second date, after painting his canvas with all the attentive strokes, screams more red flag than a bull run in Pamplona. Affection shouldn't be a chess piece, used to corner you into situations that scream "not ready!" louder than an alarm clock on Monday morning.

Sweetheart, when a relationship starts feeling like a high-stakes poker game – you're constantly being dealt hands that force you to up the ante beyond your comfort zone – it's time to consider folding. Love should feel like a safe haven, not a tactical battlefield where you're dodging manipulation grenades.

Your instincts are tingling for a reason. Listen to them. Prioritize your comfort, safety, and well-being. Breaking up is tough, but sometimes it's the bravest act of self-love. And who knows? The next adventure might just be your heart's true calling. Stay strong! 💪💖

[strateguy632]

say "earliest is 3rd" but i think 3 is too soon except flings.

[DannyUk2017]

Welcome to NEW Times and New Generation! 🤷‍♂️🤦‍♂️

[RHK36]

I mean you already said he had several red flags, but are still spending time on him. What's the question when you already have the answer.

[Fireguy17]

Just say no.
Hopefully he will respect your decision, if not time to move on.

[OhLongJohnsoning]

Some people have sex on the first
Some people NEVER have sex

It all depends on what YOU want

[OddBeMe]

That is strangely a thing for guys. Doing it in our old childhood room with our parents home.

Men are pervs….

[Miristheiss]

Wow... hook up culture is just disgusting.

[DrPepper12]

I think you answered your own question.

[dudeinohio]

Sounds like you don't want to, so don't.

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆