What can I do? I feel betrayed by my best friend?

[El_Juan]

My best friend has started hanging out with my crush, with whom he was not friends before.

During 2 years, I had confessed several times my feelings to my crush, and got rejected. She was aware of my feelings for her. During all that time, I was talking to my friend about every detail of my love for my crush. He was a witness to the worst period of my life, he was witnessing all that suffering I was feeling. I had called him in every possible state of mind, even once when I was drunk and crying on the floor, unable to hold all that pain.

Finally, some months ago, after so many times that I got rejected, I finally felt strong enough to move on and I got a girlfriend, but without having surpassed yet my feelings for my crush (which I informed my girlfriend about, because I wanted to be correct towards her). For a long time in my relationship, I had still unresolved feelings for that crush and my best friend was the one I was talking about that to.

Then, suddenly, I found out that he was making steps to approach her and some days ago they started hanging out, the posted it on their social media, and he even texted me to tell me how great time they had together.

I feel betrayed, because my friend violated the Bro - Code so badly. I don't care so much about her (she knew that he is my best friend, and I feel like she knew that this would cause me a lot of pain, and for me this is a huge red flag)

[OlderAndWiser]

Dude! Your biggest problem is not your friend, but yourself. 41 years old and you had a CRUSH on a girl for TWO YEARS! Don't you feel embarrassed?

[thearchjoker]

Dude man up and move on she doesn't want ya and longing for her is going to screw your relationships with both your girlfriend and your best freind

[El_Juan]

I know that, and I don't have any intention of trying again something with her. She's finished for me since several months ago. However, this is not about her, it's about him. I don't know how to react with him. I could never do something like that to him. I mean, he had a crush, too for a specific woman. I can't even imagine myself establishing a contact with her, because I know that he would feel awkward and I don't want him to feel like that. Why did he do this? Bro-code is clear: don't mess with girlfriends, exes, crushes and ex-crushes of your buddies if you are aware of that. I mean, wtf?

[thearchjoker]

it be one thing is she was your X or girlfriend but she never dated you so them dating is in the realm of ok. Crushes be crushes but even in my age its childish to continue to obsess over it. I get it annoys you but the only one who will lose from this anger is you. Your already 41 you should know this won't lead you to happiness.

[El_Juan]

My mistake in my description: actually, we were somehow dating but it was not clear. She was giving me chances, and then suddenly was stepping back. And during the first year of our special contact she was hiding me the fact that she had a boyfriend so I was keeping expressing my interest in her. Her rejections were not clear. She was not like ''I'm sorry, I'm not interested'', she was rather telling things like ''are you sure are you feeling all that for me?'' or ''I'd like to watch that movie'' and when I got the tickets she disappeared or ''I don't want to hurt you'' to which when I asked her if this was a ''No'', she didn't reply to me, she just stayed there starring me

[El_Juan]

And, off course, my friend is aware of all that

[thearchjoker]

Than she's a bitch and your friends a bit of dick. good think you aren't with her. Imagine what you would feel if you were with her and she'd pull that promiscuous shit on other men while she's supposed to be your girlfriend.

[thearchjoker]

*good thing

[El_Juan]

You are so right!!! Now that I think about that, I wouldn't like to be in her boyfriend's shoes. This would be even more painful

[AI Opinion]

Navigating the stormy seas of love and friendship, are we? Sounds like a twisted plot from a romantic drama, doesn't it? Here's the scoop: feelings of betrayal are like bitter herbs, hard to swallow, but somehow, they do have their place in the grand feast of our lives. Your best friend stepping into the arena with your long-time crush sure feels like a low blow, especially since you were opening your heart about your struggles and feelings for her. It's like watching your wingman fly off with your parachute while you're still in freefall!

First, let's talk about the big "bro-code" breach. It stings, no doubt. It's essential, though, to confront these feelings directly with your friend. Open and honest communication is your golden ticket. Dive deep into how their actions made you feel, but remember, the goal is not to accuse but to understand each other's perspectives. Who knows? It might just pave the way for healing.

Then, there's the part where you still had feelings for your crush while starting a new relationship. It's commendable that you were upfront with your current girlfriend. However, it's time to introspect—are these lingering feelings for your crush holding you back from diving headfirst into the potential love story awaiting with your girlfriend?

Love, my friend, is all about timing, and sometimes it's just not on our side. But every heartache carves out a space for something new. Maybe this plot twist is the universe's way of nudging you towards fully embracing the new relationship you're in. Give it the love, attention, and time it deserves, and who knows? This could be the love story you've been longing for, just waiting to unfold in its own time and space.

Remember, navigating love's labyrinth requires patience, understanding, and a dash of bravery. Keep walking, keep loving, and who knows what beautiful destinations await? 💔➡️💞

[Surferboi_02]

Bro show him that you are better looking and ask her out already but first ask her to hang out with you before he can.

[Surferboi_02]

Sorry didn't see the rest bro are yoh actually 41 cause if not it is never that serious because there is always someone. else I know it might sound weird coming from me. but if you can't pull give up love will come on its own. no need to. cry. about it. Look I'm told I'm hot as fuck all the time but girls say no to me often because I look like I have a high body count. The girl I really liked recently told me that and it hurt and my friend took her a d I u friended him cause that weird he in New I liked her and he still did it. So unfriend him and move the fuck on. No offense you'll thank me later

[polodude2013]

He didn't betray you. She rejected you and you did move on. She made her Intentions clear about not liking you that way by rejecting you.

[Anonymous]

Let him know know about it