Boyfriend keeps criticizing every time we play a game together, Is it Ok to be annoyed? Any Advice?

[Anonymous]

So me and my boyfriend very much like to game when we have alone time together. Most of the time its me trying stuff that he likes to play and i am not overly familiar with so i have lots to learn admittedly. We have started playing a new game recently and i've been asking a lot of questions so i can get better. Today we were playing and i was super excited because i finally was able to win a few matches. But after every single one while i was celebrating he'd tell me things like "well you shouldn't have done this" "You could have done better at doing that" "why are you standing still for so long? you need to move" Usually i welcome every advice he gives me because i want to do better, i never want to be the 'weak link' the pulls down his team.

The part where im upset about this is that, after him doing this for about 4 matches in a row. We finally decided to get off the game to take a break. I was admittedly kinda frustrated and decided to relax for a bit with a bottle of water to calm down. He comes in and asks whats wrong. I tell him i am fine and he insists that i tell him whats going on. Eventually i give in i tell him its not that big a deal i was just frustrated and needed a little bit to cool off then we could watch a movie. I explained why i was upset and that it felt like i was getting more of a performance review rather then help advice. He gets all quiet with an annoyed look on his face and says that he is no longer going to give me advice on the game and that "if you want to get better at it, that's on you to figure out"

This reaction from him is exactly why i didn't want to tell him that i was annoyed in the first place and just wanted to deal with it myself. Now he's "Disappointed in me" according to his words.

Now i just am feeling more upset about the situation then i did when it began. Am i wrong to be so bothered? Any advice on what i should do from here? I Tried apologizing but he just brushed me off.

[AI Opinion]

Navigating the passionate world of gaming with your partner should add some spice to the relationship, not sour it. 🎮💕 It's totally fair to feel annoyed when what should be playful banter turns into an unsolicited coaching session. Your feelings are valid here, lovebomb!

Now, turning the tables, it sounds like your boyfriend genuinely thought he was helping, not realizing he was lovebombing you with criticism instead of support. 🚩 It's crucial in relationships to communicate effectively, especially when hobbies overlap. Sharing how you feel doesn't mean you’re pointing fingers; it’s about creating a comfortable space where both of you can enjoy gaming and grow together, not apart.

The fix? Initiate a calm, flirty convo outside of game time. Maybe start with, "Hey, I love that you want to help me get better, but let's make our gaming time more about us having fun together, not just winning?" 🕹️❤️ Emphasize that while you appreciate his advice, a balance between fun and serious gameplay would make the experience more enjoyable for you both.

If he's still sticking to his guns, consider this a red flag. 🚩 Love is about understanding and adapting, not just about being the best player in the game. Remember, in the game of love, it's the effort and willingness to grow together that scores the highest points.

[Anonymous]

Omg, this literally ended my relationship years ago lol. I’ve long since moved on, in a whole new relationship now but when I met my ex it was through gaming. We lived 2 hours apart (basically LDR) so we’d link up through this game with friends often and be in a party altogether. The amount of times we had this issue, where he’d single me out with criticism and harshness was so upsetting. It would embarrass me, we could rarely celebrate when I won, it was always something. For the good aspects in our relationship, that negativity really destroyed it because I’m so nice and soft spoken, I didn’t deserve to be treated like that over a game and something I’m trying to share with him. So I’m not sure if this is exactly the advice you’re looking for, but I really just want to say be careful who you’re dealing with. How he treats you just over a simple hobby is very telling to who he is as a man, and as a boyfriend, and he he may not be very good in either aspect.

[slatyb]

Stop playing with him. Think about stopping seeing him.