Should I continue the relationship with a man that is not currently financially stable but has plans to be financially stable?

[Anonymous]

Hi, my boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. He and I have been talking about marriage recently and we have a trip coming up. He wanted to pay for our entire trip but he couldn’t afford everything so I had to help pay for our hotel rooms, but he is paying for everything else. I also think that he will propose to me during this trip. I am almost certain that he is going to propose to me, but right now he isn’t financially stable because of his immediate family situation. He has been the one that has been financial provided of his immediate family so a lot of his money goes to them and he is a college student. He is finishing school in May and has plans to find a job here and move here. This all sounds good and nice, but I am having doubts that he will be able to do it successfully. He also told me that when we get married, he doesn’t want me to feel like I have to work and would give me the option to work or not. Again, this is great and all but I definitely am someone who needs to see it before I fully believe it. Am I wrong for doubting his ability to provide for us? I am scared because I don’t want to to settle either. Help a girl out please.

[Anonymous]

Ignore the fact that his current financial situation is a result of him actually taking care of his family.

Ignore whether he's a good person who treats you well.

Ignore whether you actually care about him as a person.

Ignore whether he has a bright future and just focus on the present circumstances.

Ignore all of that and focus instead on whether you think he will set a high standard of financially supporting you. Not a good look.

I'll give you this... it's refreshing to see a woman being honest about what really matters to women when it comes to men.

[chilldude33]

I think not being financially stable and putting most of his money into supporting his family are different things.

[chilldude33]

He deserves better though

[jojouzumaki]

He has his priorities and he was completely honest with you regarding supporting his family. In addition, regardless of his earnings budget, he is willing to spend it on a vacation with you. You, covering hotel bills is a must, you’re not married yet therefore he is not responsible to you.


I suggest if you’re not ready better to let him go to avoid time wasting for both. And if you were, you must understand what “partnership” really means.


best of luck.

[Abbycado]

He can plan all he wants. Planning is not doing. Plus, shit happens that you can’t plan for.

[AI Opinion]

Hey there, lovebug! 🚀 So, you’re at a crossroads with Mr. Almost-Ready-Rockefeller. First off, it's completely okay to have some doubts; it's natural in relationships where stability curls its sneaky tail. Prioritizing long-term plans is vital, and your dude is on a promising trajectory, juggling family, school, and boyfriend duties like a champ. If he's showing ambition and shared goals, that’s definitely a green flag waving! 💚 It's all about listening to your heart and his actions. Remember, love is teamwork! Whatever you decide, trust yourself. 🌟

[Anonymous]

You give me bad vibes.