Met him on religion marital app, together for 6 months. Talked about getting married, kids etc. it’s common in our culture for things to move fast as we only date for marriage.
He’s 26, I’m 30. I said I’d prefer to get married within the next 2 years. He told he was ready, has put in place plans to marry me, and by next year he’ll be financially stable.
As short as it was we were madly Inlove. Then he suddenly dropped the bomb that his parents are in debt and owe money after house renovation. He’s earning good money so they want him to cover the costs. Due to this he’s not financially ready for a marriage. He said our timelines are not aligned -knowing I want to get married with the next 2 years. His savings will go towards paying off his parents debts etc. by the time he’s paid it off , won’t have enough money for a wedding even. He said I deserve a better more established man as he can’t give me the things I want to give me a comfortable lifestyle. On top of that he’s only just started his career.
I’m so confused , I said to tell his parents that he’s found someone and we want to get married so they understand etc and that I’ll wait for him however long it takes because I love him and want to be with him, not his money. He said as the eldest son he feels it’s his responsibility to help his parents, that’s his priority now. He has before given them money.
We broke it off and he cried that I deserve a better man who can look after me. That he knows how soon I want to get married and he doesn’t want to waste my time. He said one day I’ll understand that this was for the best, he did it for me and I’ll be grateful.
I’m so confused is the real reason guys? Was I lead on and was this was an excuse? From the start he’s talked about how important it was to him that he was financially settled so he could give me the life I want.
Or as someone who’s only just started his career, was I being unfair to him all along and pressurising him? Age factor, timeline etc
He’s 26, I’m 30. I said I’d prefer to get married within the next 2 years. He told he was ready, has put in place plans to marry me, and by next year he’ll be financially stable.
As short as it was we were madly Inlove. Then he suddenly dropped the bomb that his parents are in debt and owe money after house renovation. He’s earning good money so they want him to cover the costs. Due to this he’s not financially ready for a marriage. He said our timelines are not aligned -knowing I want to get married with the next 2 years. His savings will go towards paying off his parents debts etc. by the time he’s paid it off , won’t have enough money for a wedding even. He said I deserve a better more established man as he can’t give me the things I want to give me a comfortable lifestyle. On top of that he’s only just started his career.
I’m so confused , I said to tell his parents that he’s found someone and we want to get married so they understand etc and that I’ll wait for him however long it takes because I love him and want to be with him, not his money. He said as the eldest son he feels it’s his responsibility to help his parents, that’s his priority now. He has before given them money.
We broke it off and he cried that I deserve a better man who can look after me. That he knows how soon I want to get married and he doesn’t want to waste my time. He said one day I’ll understand that this was for the best, he did it for me and I’ll be grateful.
I’m so confused is the real reason guys? Was I lead on and was this was an excuse? From the start he’s talked about how important it was to him that he was financially settled so he could give me the life I want.
Or as someone who’s only just started his career, was I being unfair to him all along and pressurising him? Age factor, timeline etc
Updates
1 y
by the way we’re living in the UK but from different culture background if it helps
