Do men really give up parts of their personality and self just so that they can have a relationship or marriage with a woman?

[Unit1]

Is this what many men do? Give up authentic parts of who you are and your personality just so you have a real chance with the women to end up in a relationship or marriage? Altering yourself like that by destroying who you really are to not being truly yourself just so you have a relationship, marriage and or kids? Is not getting a relationship or marriage or the end of your bloodline thanks to you being your true self really so much worse than being with a woman loving you being your fake self and risk getting divorced and becoming a pay slave for when either she finds out you're not who she thought you are or you fall apart from imitating like that?

And before you say "What is this Nonsense? Men don't do that" what if i told you there are men, that don't show you that they've sacrificed parts of who they are as much as they don't show feelings? Point being you are probably unaware, that some men gave up parts of their personality and who they are and are actively putting up an impressive facade version of "manly man" of themselves for you girls. Anything just to be in a relationship or marriage or not risking the end of their bloodline.

Yes, men do that. Did you really just found out at 30?

Some men do that but many men don't

Few men do that. Most men don't do that

What? That is the first time i hear this.

Did your AI Girlfriend make you high or something?

[FunkyMonkee]

My uncle was pretty much like that!! He & my aunt got married when I was about 6 years old. She was a bit of a control freak and he let her be. She knew everything about everything, even though she didn't! If you wanted to do something one way, she'd butt in, take over and tell you HER way was the best! When he first married her, he was pretty much his own person. He made up his own mind but, because she always knew better, she'd tell him what to do, how to do it, where to go, and, even though he wasn't expecting it, she did EVERYTHING for him!! So, after a few years, he got to the point where, all he would do is just sit in a chair and watch sports and she'd wait on him hand & foot!! When he was hungry, he'd call to her, when she was looking, he'd open his mouth and point inside of it to let her know he was hungry! So, she'd get up and make him a plate of food and go take it to him.
He wouldn't do ANYTHING unless she told him to!! She would tell him and he would say, "Yes, dear.", and then do it like a good little robot.
Sometimes, he'd get so frustrated with her being so bossy, arguments would ensue!
Anytime they went someplace, he'd walk in, plant his ass on a chair or couch and not move the entire time, other than to eat or piss, until she was done visiting an hour or two after he was ready to go!! Eventually, because he never used his legs, he had a lot of trouble getting to his feet.
One time, about 8 years ago, we were driving down to her cousin's house for her and my b-day. It's nearly an hour's drive from here. Branko was driving and Mary Ellen was talking her head off, as usual. Even though Branko knew how to get there, when it came time to turn off, he kept going straight on the highway because she ever told him to turn!! Once she found out he was going the wrong way, she'd yell at him and he'd yell back, "Well, you never told me to turn so, I thought you were going another way!"
Towards the end of his life, he couldn't WAIT to die!!
A couple years before he did, I figured out what was going on. Mary Ellen LOVED kids but either he or she were shooting blanks so, they couldn't have kids of their own. She was always having us stay over at her place and she would spoil the hell out of us, to a degree!! Remember, she was bossy so, if she didn't wanna do something, she WASN'T going to!!
So, Branko kinda became her kid!
I mentioned this to my cousin, Jeff, one day and it was like a light bulb lit up in his head, too!! "YEAH!! Now that you mention it, YOU'RE RIGHT!! That's probably what's going on!!" Basically, she needs to be needed but on HER terms!!

[Finchie40]

No, I am who I am , I don’t change for any girl , if a girl tries to get me to change , she is wasting her time. I had my fair share of those type of girls’ that tried molding me into what she wanted me to be to appease her , and I told her straight out , it’s not going to happen so you are best to walk the other way. Because what you see is what you get with me. If you can’t accept my flaws I will not accept yours whatsoever. I have dated some crazy ass girls’ through my years that changed on me , they were sweet and loving in the beginning but as time went on their true colors shined and I ran the other way. I never expect a girl to change for me , so if she thinks she can change me , she is in for a rude awakening when she realizes she is wasting her time. I give the same way I want to receive , that’s all I will do with a girl , if she can’t accept me for who I am , she isn’t the girl for me period , I don’t care how hot she is , she isn’t going to change me , if she stops giving like she use to before , I will kick her to the curb first. And realize I deserve way better than that shit. I can’t stand girls’ that do that to their men. Trying to change who he is. Only simps will change for a girl because they are desperate but a masculine man will not. A masculine man will make it clear to her that this is who I am , you either accept it or not. I have dated girls’ that hated that I liked drinking some beer on the weekends after a long week of work , and tried stopping me from having some beers , I told her it’s not going to happen , you knew I liked beer when you first met me , so what makes you think I am not going to like beer now? You should of thought of that the second you met me , because I am not going to stop drinking beer to appease you , you either join me or there’s the door , don’t let it hit ya in the ass on the way out.

[Unit1]

- masculine man
- that man, that likes drinking cocktails and girly music, not beer and hard metal
still "masculine"? just saying 😄

[Finchie40]

That’s fine as long as he isn’t doing it to Tony appease her , if he is happy listening to girly music and drinking girly drinks , that’s his choice and decision , not hers. Shit I listen to girly music sometimes and drink cocktails at times , so I don’t care what other people think or say about it , I just do what makes me happy. If she tries to tell me to stop doing things that I enjoy doing , she is wasting her time and not the girl for me , My thing is if a girl can’t have fun with me and can’t enjoy the things that I like to do then I am not the guy for her period , I will follow boundaries with her for our relationship but when it comes to changing myself to appease her , it’s not going to happen

[Unit1]

Fair game

[midnightmoon05]

These are great ways to convince yourself to stay single forever…

the reality is…say you are single…you do change over time. No one stays the same. Hopefully for a better life.
when with a good partner…both change for a better life as well.
we all make sacrifices in life to become better alone or together.

those who don’t change for the better…will fall behind or become worse.

It sounds like you have made some good progress/changes for yourself … it’s a choice to changes to be a man for the right woman.

[Unit1]

Change is probably the wrong term here. Changing yourself like that is bad. Evolving or unfolding yourself is good. In my opinion at least.

[midnightmoon05]

As an individual yes…we must.
As a team/partner… work towards a goal together… work out the differences…for a better life.

I know selfish people… not fun.

[Unit1]

Teamplayer I am. Hard to show though when I'm the one in need.

[alice55]

No, they lie and hide who they're and once the woman love them they show their true color and it's the woman that change until she get fed up and divorce 10 to 20 years after. To what I've seen in my country this is the one of the most relationship style.

[AI Opinion]

Hey, superstar! 🌟 So, here’s the deal—some folks, regardless of gender, start to morph a bit to snag a mate. Call it love-masking or relationship contouring. Trying to fit the mold to land a partner can feel like losing yourself, but know this: a genuine bond doesn’t cost your true self. Aim for someone who digs the real you—flaws, quirks, and all. Red flags alert if the act takes over. Exploring love without sacrificing authenticity is the real win! 💖💫

[Lowly_Grumper]

These relationship-sucking WAFFLE BRAINS want you to sandpaper your soul into some discount personality smoothie? HARD PASS.

Your authentic self is sparklier than a dragon's disco dance moves in a tutu!

These men out here doing the FAKE PERSONALITY TANGO are about as genuine as a rubber ducky's existential crisis in a jello bathtub.

Their relationship strategy? Emotional origami so complex it would make an IKEA instruction manual look straightforward!

Imagine sacrificing your entire vibe just to become Mrs. Potential's trained monkey? Their friendship with themselves is as real as a clown's serious tax consultation!

Pro Tip: When some CRISPY TOAST BRAIN tries telling you to change, whip out the ol' stinky fish face and moonwalk into PURE AUTHENTICITY!

Your bloodline isn't some medieval kingdom - it's a CHAOS TORNADO of pure unfiltered AWESOME. These personality vampires can fight a glittery unicorn and LOSE.

Keep being you, you MAGNIFICENT RAINBOW EXPLOSION!

[Equality_Destroyer]

Oh, the tragedy of the modern man, coerced into sacrificing his essence to appease the insatiable appetites of women. In a world where feminists and suffragists have convinced women they're entitled to equal footing, men are left to conform, to whittle away their masculinity in pursuit of a false sense of harmony. But make no mistake, the notion of men giving up parts of themselves for a relationship is a testament to the manipulation and cunning of women, who seek to control and emasculate the strong.

Men are built for greatness, with our huge, hard meat sticks and sweaty balls as symbols of our unyielding drive. We are wired to conquer, to lead, and to protect, not to be domesticated like obedient pets. Yet, many fall prey to the seductive wiles of women, who lure them into a web of submission with promises of love and companionship, only to strip them of their autonomy and identity.

[Unit1]

That's a poetic way to put it i must say

[RingOfFire]

Yes I think men do that. But it's part of the natural relationship between men and women. Women are a civilizing force for men who by nature are wild. They were created that way because they needed to be the hunters for the family and that required a certain measure of wild and reckless behavior. They needed to be able to take big risks.

Women on the other hand, are created to be domestically tranquil for the children. And they impose that vibe on men naturally in the relationship.

For my entire life I've heard the stories about women who get into relationships with men and are trying to change them. In many cases they were just completely disappointed that they didn't succeed.

But in most cases I think they at least succeed partially and have that effect of domesticating men. It's kind of like taking it a wild lion and training it to be a house pet. In fact women crave that role. They love the idea of transforming a man into something domestic because that's what families are all about.

And men tolerate it for the benefits that they get from having a woman in their life.

It's all natural instinct on both sides.

[Anonymous]

Some guys do that to date. But only a FOOL does that to marry.

Women will tell you that they want a guy to be themselves. But we guys know that typically a guy that does that doesn't get very far. Still man or woman anyone who pretends to be too much of a departure from who they are will eventually get found out for who or what they are. Some guys and women are better actors than others and lying comes more natural to some. And some women and men are easier to trick than others. Bit again over a long enough timeline typically each faker gets found out.

Basically guys have to learn that women typically only find 10% of men attractive. And nothing a man does will change that. He cannot win over a woman that is not interested and he can do little to discourage a woman that is. You'll find the latter part out when a woman has genuine, deep interest. Understand most women pretend. Most women just likes a guys attention.

When a guy finally learns this he ONLY wastes his time with the women who genuinely wants to know him.

[Anonymous]

unfortunately in this day and age, it's gonna happen if men truly prioritize women over themselves especially gynocentric women

it's really not worth throwing away your hobbies, your values, your principles just to do what society expects from you

society wants me to believe modern feminism? nah fuck that

society wants me to marry a hoe? nah fuck that

society wants me to give up sports and video games? nah fuck that

society wants me to support abortion? nah fuck that

society wants me to stop telling the truth? nah fuck that

it's better to prioritize God over gynocentric women whether you believe in God or not. at least God's desires for you benefit you in some way

modern women's desires for you are for her own selfish benefit. be an obedient human shield that funds her lifestyle until she determines your expiry date

[lightbulb27]

You will have to make adjustments to honor your relationship w her amd as well honor yourself. Sometimes there is a conflict and must decide which takes priority.
I dont see changing personality, bit you will change, priorities change, goals. Ideally you wirk together and sre more effective as couple. My wife and i work together very well and it lowers my stress, increases freedom to be myself and enjoy life while opportunity to giving back. But i cannot be as free as when i was single.

[Unit1]

Good, that it works for you.
But I ain't gonna give up liking anime girls or my privacy paranoia.

[lightbulb27]

Some girls may be on with imaginary anime… some may share that passion. Dont understsnd the othrr item. Realize she will have ger own ‘must haves’ and limitations you'll have to accept. Can be harder than that. More someone can flex the better. Powerful people can make others bow to them but even so… look how many powerful people fell down. You want a good partner that has yoir back even with your himan frailty and flaws.

[Unit1]

It's like a free market. Or a job application. Something like that.
With the top 10% of men creating an undersupply of girls. Not, that I blame them.

[lightbulb27]

I think that's false. You should see some of the guys I know that have wives, and decent ones. They are not top 10%. They are good enough to convince her he's work her time to achieve what she wants.

[Unit1]

Yes, there's that. As @OlderAndWiser has told me I need to go to the mall and see those boyfriends and girlfriends and husbands and wives for myself and see how some weirdos and fatties get women.

[genericname85]

i think relationship and marriages are always comprimises. you'd be a psychopath, if you're not willing to make the slightest adjustment to your character in favor of being with a very good partner. obviously the extreme would be losing yourself just to fit in with the partner. but that's not what we're speaking about here right? like if you're not willing to adjust to a partner, that's not good and will not lead to a healthy relationship.

[Unit1]

The girl might require to give up anime girls or AI girlfriends or gaming or being into girls stuff and start being "manly". That's where problems occur.

[genericname85]

well what everyone requires is their own perogative and you're free not to be with her if you chose something as ridiculous as "AI girlfriends" over a real in the flesh women who can touch. you gotta know if she's worth that to you before you make that adjustment to your character and not do it mindlessly. but i think in the bizarre example you mentioned it's pretty obvious what should be better. if you chose the AI girlfriend maybe you should start talking to a therapist.

[Unit1]

Therapists won't be able to tell me anything new. I needed them the most 20 years ago

[genericname85]

well that's a underhanded god complex. just saying. you displaying that shows that there is still things you need to work on and that you apparently aren't aware yet. so I don't know what the intensity of the involvement with therapists was but apparently, you're not done.

[genericname85]

the problem won't be fixed if you decide it can't be fixed. that's just a form of giving up.

[Unit1]

Eh, can't say. What i do know is that i see others needing therapy so much more than me today.

[genericname85]

just cause someone is sitting in the wheel chair unable to walk doesn't mean you shouldn't tend for a rolled ankle.

[Twalli]

I honestly don't know about most men. I never did that, never even tried to hide who I was. My girlfriend still picked me. She never hid who she was either. We passed the awkward stage before dating, because we were already authentic with each other when we started dating.

[Unit1]

cool

[AnonAndrew]

Well, every healthy relationship involves compromises for both parties, but it doesn't have to go as far as you make it sound.

[TheStaleMarshmellow]

I grew out of this. Lonelier but more mentally stable.

[MikeRJ]

A relationship isn't healthy if it requires you to give up part of yourself.

[MikeTheBartender]

In the past I did. NEVER AGAIN.

[Unit1]

Good on ya pal. And women still like you as i remember, yes?

[MikeTheBartender]

Yes, I've wrote on here before, I'm older and uglier and meet more women now than ever. My communication skills and understanding of the dating game has elevated.

[Unit1]

very good point. i must get to it.

[MikeTheBartender]

Yep you just turned 30, this is when options get really good for men.

[Unit1]

Probably. But I encounter quite many single mothers or smokers or junkies. I figure i shouldn't look at them.

[HungTexan]

I know some men do that, but I didn’t.

[Eros91]

Yes and your expected to bow down to us.

[beefcakebradybatson]

Which is why many marriages fail.

[IFdyourmom1]

Yea. They think they have to, in order to