Have you totally given up on love?

Question

I think I am at that point where I don't think I will ever find love again. I think for me it was a once in a lifetime kind of thing and now I need to embrace being alone. I'm going into 2026 focused solely on my writing project.

ohsheeT · Accepted Answer

No not me I can't give up on anything I know what to do i just haven't done it yet.

And neither can you because this is why we are all here

because of love.
We are all pure energy when we understand this and understand every thing around us is not even there the only reason we can see things is because of vibration we are one conscious?

Ok time out I'm not going to go there
Any way we both know you can't and won't give up its not in your DNA and plus I'm betting your orgasms are just way to powerful to walk away from we are all the past the present the future meditate become one with self
With others. And with our universe let every thing else go your answers are in your writings become free free your mind heart soul spirit

You are stuck in a loop you keep playing the same thing over and over
Pickup bump the record player get ur head and heart in another grove end that song it's time for a new one and your the only one that can change it
It really is right in front of you you just have to let go and experience it but before you do you have to clear every thing else out.

You are love you are the deepest part of love embrace it understand it and become it it.
We are all love most think they understand it but it's deeper and at the same time the answer is right in front of us
For me it's just about time I know what I have to do but I need to experience maybe a couple more things that will take me all the way there

nawtee_me · Accepted Answer

I believe that life has a way of surprising us when we least expect it. Focus on your work and on your passion for writing and let life run its course.

RandomGirl42 · Accepted Answer

I'm not really sure what to say here but I felt inclined to reply. I mean, I have no real xperience, I'm kinda young and only been in 1 serious relationship in my life so what could I possibly have to say?

I could say all the cliche' crap like "never give up" and all kinds of quotes about love from other people but I know that prolly won't help u much either. I guess I just wanted to say I hope u find your dreams. I believe somehow, someway, we all can.

sage2021 · Accepted Answer

Aww sis❣️ I'm glad that I am the one who can tell you this from experience.
You do know that when you give up on love, and just don't care anymore and resign yourself to the rest of your life not finding love anymore, that's the time it will happen. It's just the way how the universe works.
I'm not saying it will happen soon, but someday it's gonna happen, and when it does, please remember this message.
Sage 🌷

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

As your resident love guru on Girls Ask Guys, let me sprinkle some hope dust on this! Love can be sneaky, popping up when least expected, like socks finally matching after doing laundry! It's okay to focus on your writing project and embrace quality "me time." Love isn't a one-off deal; it's a journey with twists, turns, and maybe a surprise plot twist just ahead. Keep your heart open – love often advances like a ridiculously cute puppy when you're least prepared. 😊 Keep writing, dreaming, and never fully shut the door on love. It's out there, just waiting to surprise you! ❤️

Finchie40 · Answer

I am with you girl, after being married for 20 years to someone that I thought wanted to spend the rest of our lives together ended , I realized finding true love is hard to find these days , I feel social media played a big part of damaging peoples’ mindsets and old school relationships are a thing of the past , I feel people have become way more selfish by constantly thinking grass is greener on the other side. Not realizing if they just water the grass they are already standing on , then love will grow , but selfish mindsets make people only care about themselves and what they feel is best for themselves , Basically what my wife did to me and blind sided me , she turned into someone I don’t even really know anymore , her and I are still mutual for the kids’ sake but now that they are older , my wife wants to be single and do her own thing , as much as I was hurt and sad that she no longer wanted us , I just accepted it for what it is , cuz I realize I don’t want to force someone to love me and stay with me , that’s dumb and stupid , I just want a girl that wants me and loves me the same way I do for her , but in today’s’ world , it seems harder to find.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

I don’t know if “given up” is accurate for myself. I don’t put any thought or energy into dating anymore, but i’m sure a glimmer of hope remains. I’ve been used and abused too many times to cling to it. It would take an unbelievable woman to change the way i conduct myself. If such a woman exists, what are the chances we meet? If we met, what are the chances that she’s not similarly jaded as i am, and would be willing to chip away at the wall i’ve put up? The odds are astronomical and that’s not hyperbole. So it’s just childish to invest any more time, energy and money into the process anymore.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

I have been disappointed in love several times, but I never abandoned hope. I met Ms. Helen in December 2020, she moved in with me in July, 2021, we got engaged in March, 2023, and married on April 27, 2024. It is never too late and you are never too old to find love.

HawkPerception · Answer

No and I doubt I ever will because a life with real love is always better than without it. It suddenly feels like light has been brought into your life.

However, the search for the love we all want can be very depressing at times.

AviatorTom · Answer

Never.  Those who give up on love are trying too hard. You can't make love happen. You have to let love find you.

Purpleronnie · Answer

I think I can definitely understand why anyone might have that viewpoint either at times or actually decide to never again seek that type of connection. I have questioned myself at times whether the love that I believe I have needed does exist but soul searching points me to how I understood love being the biggest part of the problem / solution.

I think the most honest answer I can give you about ME and my experience is that love was always more an IDEAL and that largely my experience points at people having largely unrealistic expectations more in line with fantasies or fairytales than what’s possible. That love should be effortless and flawless where 2 people are in sync completely like some sort of Devine coupling / “soulmates”.

The love I beleive I have found bares no resemblance, it’s taken a huge amount of work and will likely continue , it’s a deep acceptance of imperfection which many seem to lack awareness of constantly placing every nuance under a Microscope to consider what color of flag it should be assigned 🤣

The love I have found is far from Perfect , but it’s real , its dynamic , its constant open communication that’s sometimes really hard ! But required. It’s constant respect and curiosity. It’s demanding through the permanent consideration of your partner in everything you do , in every decision made.
Love is perfectly imperfect.

So yes , in many ways I had to give up love to find the love I now have.

But I promise you , it’s worth the fight.

Joshydavid25 · Answer

You don't really find it.. You allow yourself to grow into it with somebody.. And really it's ultimately up to you if you allow yourself to get past you lingering feelings for your ex, and get to grow into love with someone else.. Love is a choice and a duty, it's not emotions because those change even if they are deep for the moment..

The question is do you feel like you'll ever find a person who you want to commit life to and form a sense of duty to them.. Of course you will, it's up to you to recognize it though.. We all do in life.. To ultimately answer your question..

Bitter_Sweet94 · Answer

No, I haven’t.

I’m just more selective now.

I don’t chase chaos, I don’t romanticize bare minimum, and I don’t call every spark “love.”

I still believe in connection, the kind that feels steady, honest, and real but I’m not in a rush and I’m not forcing anything.

If it comes, good.

If it doesn’t, I’m still whole.

FreyaRed · Answer

Embrace the soothing voice of loneliness. Love is an imagination we create for ourselves while we glorify a person who isn't objectively the person we imagine. In harsher words love is self deception, with age we just get smarter and lose the desire to deceive ourselves, that's why every love has to die, desire for love has to die.

sawno · Answer

No, but its very hard for me to find someone I can love properly. After having been with a perfect match that fit me so incredibly well it screwed with what I look for in a relationship. If you experience certain things that are rare and a new date doesn't deliver on those things it feels hollow.

Vevv123 · Answer

I guess I haven’t really thought about it enough, but I would say no. I don’t even think love is a worry, it’s mostly finding someone that is genuine and is not lustful. I rather stay alone if I can’t find someone like that and it’s probably going to be hard and almost impossible because it’s not like I can read minds, you never really know someone and it’s just scary to think that you can be with someone that can eventually cheat or possibly do worser things.

InknKink · Answer

Nope.

I love easily. I just don't fall into the entrapment of story book romances. Some loves are made to last while others are there to be experienced only for a short while.

Worst thing you can do is place an expectation on something. Enjoy things for what they are and not what you want them to be. Love comes easy if you let it.

Amy_Mi · Answer

Not given up, just selective.

Love isn’t about chasing anyone who comes along, it’s about waiting for alignment, energy, and respect that matches your own.

Patience and clarity are more powerful than desperation.

True connection doesn’t fade under standards, it thrives because of them.

RavVid · Answer

Till death do us part is not on if that is what we mean by love. The stats on divorce is quite clear. It does seem guys and girls can managed a year or two. How do you feel about short term love?

exitseven · Answer

okay, love does not work on anybody's timetable. It is sort of like this.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/EMIJwDtuXT4

"Sometimes our light goes out but is blown again into flame by an encounter with another human being. Each of us owes the deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this inner light."

Albert Schweitzer

WhitneySnow · Answer

I’m sorry. I hope someday you and your love can get together or at least be close friends (if that’s something you would consider). At least you have your writing to keep you from being lonely.

Staximus · Answer

I think you're putting too much mustard on a hot dog dude. You didn't lose the love of your life or else he would still be there. There's a million other guys out there. Maybe now is not the time but you'll meet another guy sooner or later. Just keep your eyes open. Don't get so hung up thinking about some guy that's not there anymore and not see the guy in front of your face. You might miss a good one.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

That's not true you will find love again but you have to chill and let it happen. You're dating these dudes that aren't worth your time and then your down on yourself when it doesn't work. Your better than that and you deserve better your a good woman get someone thats on your level or better and get off those dating apps. Nobody thats serious about finding a long term relationship is on those apps they just want to hook up

PeachyPie93 · Answer

Not fully.. there's always hope that a guy I enjoy, like how he looks, and he likes me back will come into my life one day..  I still want one more kid so it would be nice if it happened soon lol

Noodle_fan · Answer

Nope  Also to me love isn't all about getting boyfriend/girlfriend U said u want to focus on ur writing , is that ur passion? That should count as love too.

Spencer10 · Answer

Not in the slightest. When the time is right I think it will happen. I will not give up. But I would also prefer to be alone and happy than with some one and miserable. So I will not settle or panic to make it happen, l

CupcakeTheDestroyer · Answer

As someone who identifies as aro/ace, I’ve simply removed myself from amatonormtivity, which has made my life better by leaps and bounds. I think you could benefit from doing the same

Ironco · Answer

You are pretty young to feel this way.  Take a break from searching, you might be surprised what might happen. Good luck...

BadApple69 · Answer

Love is not once in a lifetime…. We have the capacity to love many people in our lifetimes. Put yourself out there and see what you find.

strateguy632 · Answer

Age 33? You are desirable to men age 40. I am 50 and as the "junior woodquack guide book" said "never lose hope!".

Nikki1989 · Answer

Nope, over 16 years with my husband, and the love is just as intense now as it has ever been.

Jersey2 · Answer

If you want love, you are already late to the party at 33. If you bury yourself in work and self pity for ten years then it will be over for you. Shake it off and get back out there soon.

Shiprex · Answer

Nope. Every day there's an opportunity to bump into the next love of your life. Who knows, maybe something with someone you know already could kindle into something special.

lucas262 · Answer

Iv heard enough women talk about it. I genuinely do not believe men and women love the same. I think people really dont understand the word anymore. I holds a lot less weight today. I think it holds the weight you put behind it.

DryGermanGuy · Answer

„Never give up, never surrender!!!“  - Cdr. Quincy Taggart, Galaxy Quest

Awesomesauce2005 · Answer

I am at a point where I believe 90% of women are crazy selfish feminists and I won't be able to find a traditional wife. Every woman I've met close to my age has either had a boyfriend or doesn't want a family

Anonymous · Answer

Yes! I’m 10 years older than you, but I have never had a boyfriend let alone a guy interested in me.  and I’m okay with that, my life will go on.

OneViewpoint · Answer

Nope I haven't given up. It just seems more unlikely as time goes on.

MemeSupreme · Answer

ironically i think you'll more likely find someone bc you aren't looking for it lol

Unycorn · Answer

Yes. There is no luck in love for me. You cannot make someone love you.

Still-alive · Answer

Not completely. Im not exactly enthusiastic to go out and find someone however i still leave an open mind in case i do

Iron_Man · Answer

It’s impossible now women want their own power. They don’t want to be tied down. Nothing works out I have tried two times now

molly1997xxx · Answer

I felt that way after my breakup but I then I somehow got a boyfriend again so I’m good now

Xawyx-2 · Answer

Partially, but I'm still hoping, you shouldn't lose hope either, you still have time.

MannMitAntworten · Answer

No. I just don’t spend any time pondering if it is in the cards or not. If it happens it happens.

Pohjolan · Answer

Nah I don't chase it but I also haven't give up on it. Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, its probably shit.

nas____isssz · Answer

Yes, me too. I don't like men who are into blondes and I don't want to date them, but I don't know if I'll ever find someone like that, so I prefer to stay single.

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

I've given up on love from yeara ago but not totally cause never say never hehe

dudeinohio · Answer

Dont give up.. patience and persistence wins. You have many decades left to find someone.

Anonymous · Answer

Is it cause you are still in love with your ex who is taken?

Californiagirl5 · Answer

Focus on yourself; everything else will fall into place.

Twalli · Answer

I have it, not going to give up on what I have.

Darkest-Knight · Answer

100% given up. I don't stand a chance of ever meeting someone who would be attracted to me.

msc545 · Answer

With women? Absolutely. All interactions with women feel transactional.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know if this means yes or no, but I'm 29 right now. Haven't been with anyone before. I look at it like if I find it then great, but if I don't then it's cool. I'm already used to the latter, so if that remains then it is what it is. 🤷‍♂️

Butterfly38142 · Answer

Yes, most men just want sex without the commitment of a marriage

Wuai201 · Answer

Oh yea I'm tired  No good men around me...

katiesmuff · Answer

Heck no I am finding it a great joy!

Anonymous · Answer

what made it once in a life time

jazzy34 · Answer

No I have not. I’m an optimist.

DvSof9 · Answer

Love isjust chemical reaction humans get in order to easily mate and procreate, there is no platónic/romantic thing behind.

Cidknee · Answer

Yeah, at the turn of the century, 25 years ago. 😭

Nerdvana · Answer

Yes, but I don't have any other choice.

Sal_Monella · Answer

I think love from a woman is an illusion.

Godihateyou · Answer

I never believed in it to begin with.

Have you totally given up on love?

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