My best friend kissed my ex?

[Anonymous]

My best friend (WHO HAS A BOYFRIEND) of 6-7 years kissed a guy i used to hook up with.
Background
The guy and I had a horrible falling out, he said awful things and never apologized for them. My best friend has seen me cry over this guy. A year later he comes back to hanging around the friend group. I have a boyfriend now and i love him so much. The guy came up to me and said “we are cool” even though he never apologized so of course I hate him. He also tries so hard to become friends with my boyfriend, but of course he isn’t having it.
I just recently threw a party for my boyfriends birthday. The guy ended up showing up because of the mutual friends we have. Of course my boyfriend and I did everything in our power to avoid him all night, and he would still try and talk to me.
When I was dealing with a drunk person during the party my friend and the guy went to go get food. She got in his car!!! Of course it's the one time I wasn't in the room. Like an hour later they come back into the party with food, then my friend comes and stands next to me and doesn't say anything. There's also a chance they went to the bathroom together. The next day I ask her what happened and she admits that they kissed. She claimed she shut him down but then immediately contradicts herself with her next text. This is not the first time she has displayed “pick me” behavior
I guess it's just never been this bad. Her boyfriend emotionally cheated on her a month or 2 ago and ever since then she has been manipulating him. I also maybe feel sometimes she might be jealous of me, not on no cocky stuff.

The cheating aspect aside, do we think I should or. Ever can forgive her. Should jus let that bridge burn no matter how long we have been friends?

Try and work it out and give another chance

Fuck no, fuck that bitch

[Hardon-Collider]

It's a separate life, in a sense. You know how people unconsciously call it "sex life"? That's because many people (everyone, until discipline is built) literally let a different organism (for lack of a better word) control your actions. It's not the true self, your real "I" who bangs a friend's ex as the part of you that is in a relationship, but a smaller part of you that's running loose. ㅤ

Just like with bodybuilding, the recipe is not just to isolate, that's not my goal of separating the passionate horse in you. Recognize that part of you running wild before you can find the right place for it, you isolate and then integrate, like you grow muscles faster if you sprinkle in some isolated work on muscle groups as opposed to solely whole body movements.

If you recognize the mechanics of what went on (i know that it's nothing deep in what i wrote, and you can study it better on your own) to the point that you clearly see the cause and why you know it will never happen again, if you both grasp it and she apologizes for hurting you, of course it will be better for you than just burning everything to the ground.

But it isn't scary occult esotericism or anything, not super complex psychology for professionals. It's literally the mechanics of our consciousness that we learn through trial and error the slow way.

Discipline, tolerating discomfort like yogic freaks do, is not just something that makes you a better person, but literally without it you are guaranteed to cheat, especially while drunk. Even simply the endogenous drunkedness (horny, romantic hormones) do that. They push out your true "I" that makes decisions. Imagine a world where every person's personality gets erased at the push of a button and the only difference between humans is the shape of their body. But all minds and souls are the same. That's what happens when the passions overpower your "I". Cheating is guaranteed. Guaranteed, except for miracles.

[lightbulb27]

zombies are on the loose... and now they are pair bonding and mating, but it's a mess.

step 1: no alcohol

step 2: establish standards for behavior that protect all of you in the difficult path of finding a mate, which is not easy... takes some exploration of self and other personalities to find whom works

step 3: accept everyone is screwd up and you are going to have to manage what is in effect, developing wounded children.

step 4: reading all that, you might want to find a higher power you can cry out to

step 5: ...

[AI Opinion]

Oh, the drama! 🎭 Relationship coaching here, sprucing things up!

Your bestie kissing your ex sounds like a classic friend-emotional-cheat scandal. 🚨🙈 It's important to consider if that friend values your feelings and mutual respect. Friendships should lift you up, not trip you down. If she keeps stirring the pot 🍲, this might be a red flag in disguise. 💔 You're not alone in facing sticky friendship webs, but always prioritize your happiness and who makes you feel loved. Ultimately, it's about boundaries and your well-being. Sparkle on, lovely! ❤️✨

[AviatorTom]

Why are you so interested in people you no longer deal with?

[Asker]

It's a friendship betrayal? She's my best friend if I've confided in her in all of my toughest moments, her basically displaying an act of unloyalty even though I've always had her back.

[AviatorTom]

Would you please explain why her action is unloyal when she does something with someone you don't give a shit about.

[Drumlin2001]

Her boyfriend should be pissed. Not aure why it bothers you so much. He was just a hook up in the past.

[Asker]

I'm upset with her betraying my trust. Girl code is a thing

[Asker]

It's a friendship betrayal? She's my best friend if I've confided in her in all of my toughest moments, her basically displaying an act of unloyalty even though I've always had her back. I. e going with the guy no one is on good terms with, the hoe, the one that did everyone so dirty

[Asker]

Def a bit more than one hookup, he was
also my friend at first. Too many feelings got involved when it did happen

[midnightmoon05]

Are you surprised?

[Anonymous]

You should try giving the second chance.