Why do my parents keep pressuring me about kids?

[Brittanyroseee]

Im a 27 year old woman and i work as a registered veterinary technician. I already found my calling and something i enjoy. My parents keep making comments to me about how i need to start dating and they want me to get married. I tell them all the time i am not interested right now in relationships and marriage happens when it is meant to happen. They also know i don’t want kids since i have told them in the past due to past comments however yesterday was valentines day and i was talking to them on the phone, and my stepmom began telling me how im getting “older” and i need to find someone ASAP. I told her that it will happen when it happens and she said “no i want it to happen now” and i was like “why?” And she said “i want grandkids” and i said “you know what i said before about this. All i can offer is pets” she just continued saying “but i want grandchildren” and i told her “i like pets instead sorry” why don’t they respect my boundaries? Not everyone wants the same thing in life. She proceeded to tell me she wants tons of them. Im not a factory. How do i make them understand?

[AviatorTom]

Like most parents, they want grandkids, to continue the family lineage. And they would like them soon so that they have time to enjoy them before they get too old.

[Brittanyroseee]

Tooo bad im adopted and they won't be biological so no point😂😂😂😂

[AviatorTom]

@Brittanyroseee Biology doesn't really matter. They still want grandkids.

[Brittanyroseee]

Well what matters is what i want.

[Brittanyroseee]

Eh. doesn't matter what they want tho

[Brittanyroseee]

They won't be the ones carrying that thing for 9 months and pushing it out themselves then having to take care of it 24/7, changing its dirty diapers, wiping its dirty bum, etc

[AviatorTom]

@Brittanyroseee That's a pretty selfish view of life. Good luck

[Brittanyroseee]

How is it selfish? Its true though….

[Brittanyroseee]

It does matter what i want at the end of the day- its my life and my own uterus

[Brittanyroseee]

A baby/child consumes a lot of ur time energy money and patience

[Brittanyroseee]

They want grandkids but who is gonna be the one to carry it for 9 months and push it out and take care of it and change its dirty nappies?

[Brittanyroseee]

I dont like babies or small kids tbh

[Imjustagirl1520]

@AviatorTom how is she selfish for not wanting kids and wanting to take care of them?🤣

[AviatorTom]

@Imjustagirl1520 Defition of selfish...

self·ish
[ˈselfiSH]
(of a person, action, or motive) lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure:

She clearly satisfies the second part of the definition, "concerned chiefly with [her] own... pleasure"

[Imjustagirl1520]

@AviatorTom so you think having a kid in this horrible world is selfless? And that she should have a kid because her parents want grandkids? u have to be joking me.

[Brittanyroseee]

@AviatorTom a lot of selfish people have kids too how stupid of a old man are you?

[Brittanyroseee]

@Imjustagirl1520 does he not realize there are a lot of bad parents out there that abuse their kids?

[Brittanyroseee]

@AviatorTom do u not realize a lot of people have kids and are abusive? Having a kid does not make you a good person. You have to be a good person already. Im a good person but im not selfless enough to sacrifice my life for a kid and i dont have that type of interest either. Also, i can't afford a kid. Who is the selfish one? Its selfish if i have a kid i cannot love or care for

[Brittanyroseee]

@AviatorTom lots of people have kids and are selfish. Many people abuse their kids, neglect them.

[Brittanyroseee]

@AviatorTom i also do not owe the world kids nor my parents. Im my own person

[Brittanyroseee]

@AviatorTom my pleasure does matter because its my life nobody elses life. Do u want me to be miserable for the rest of my life? Do u want kids to have unloving parents?

[Brittanyroseee]

I cannot even afford a kid. Brother. You are a breeder.

[Brittanyroseee]

I have some friends who had abusive parents. I dont think everyone should have a child sir.

[Brittanyroseee]

My friends mom babysits for someone who has 2 kids and her husband starves her children. She is also abused. Yeah. Buddy….

[Brittanyroseee]

She is in the middle of a divorce and trying to leave but the dad will time the son and if he doesn't finish his food fast enough he takes it away. The son is also not allowed snacks at home.

[Brittanyroseee]

Are you ok with abuse on kids as long as the species continues?

[Brittanyroseee]

Do u remember gabriel ramirez? The kid that was locked in a closet and his mom and stepdad would beat him daily and feed him cat litter?

[Brittanyroseee]

Do u think this is ok?

[Brittanyroseee]

What about casey anthony? The lady that drowned her toddler? U think everyone should be breeding?

[Brittanyroseee]

Or what about the dad that raped his 7 month old infant to the point where her insides came out? Real case man.

[Brittanyroseee]

Or what about the mom that left her infant baby in a high chair for days while she went to go party?

[Brittanyroseee]

Should everyone have kids? A lot of people have kids and abuse them my guy. Come ob

[Brittanyroseee]

Come on***

[Brittanyroseee]

Or what about the lady that sold her infant baby to buy drugs?

[Brittanyroseee]

Oh and dont get me started on the lady in california who dumped off her infant baby in a parking lot and drove off with people recording her

[Brittanyroseee]

What about the dads that sexually abuse their sons and daughters?

[Brittanyroseee]

Why does everyone need to be breeding?

[Brittanyroseee]

How do u know i won't be neglectful of the baby?

[Brittanyroseee]

A lot of people are having kids and are horrible fucking parents old man.

[Imjustagirl1520]

@Brittanyroseee yeah I don't know. Its so much easier for men to say stuff like this, they dont get the same effect as we are

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

They told you why. Most parents want grandchildren.

Nevertheless, if you don't want kids then don't have any lest you end up upset and resent your kids as they are going to consume a big portion of your time and energy.

[Brittanyroseee]

Exactly. They take up 100% of ur time, patience, money, and energy. I can't do that!

[Brittanyroseee]

I dont think my parents realize how much a baby/kid consumes. Its a lot of work and responsibility and once u have a kid its not about u anymore.

[Brittanyroseee]

Yeah i would end up miserable and probably would resent them.

[DishLady]

Propagation of the species. It's instinctual pressure. You're here in the universe bc your parents were pressured. They exist in the universe bc they were pressured. And so on and so forth.

[Brittanyroseee]

I won't give into the pressure nor bring an unwanted life into this horrible world

[DishLady]

So either tie your tubes or stop having sex. End the whole drama completely.

[Brittanyroseee]

I dont have sex;)

[Brittanyroseee]

Ur silly

[Brittanyroseee]

Id abort anyway if i ever got pregnant

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to help you protect your heart, your peace, and your boundaries, gorgeous 💁‍♂️

Your parents are projecting their dreams onto you, ignoring yours. That’s not lovebombing, that’s pressure. You were crystal clear: no kids, pets instead, life on your terms.

You don’t need to make them understand, only accept. Calmly repeat: “This topic is closed. If you keep pushing, I’ll end the conversation.” Then follow through. Boundaries without consequences are just wishes.

[Anonymous]

Ok so your stepmom is a psychopath who's trying to live her life through you and gaslighting controlling manipulating and toxic good to know thanks for sharing your stepmom is a psychopath

[NathanDavis]

because they love the idea of grandkids

[Brittanyroseee]

I love the idea of pets

[NathanDavis]

me too... but four pets are enough, lol

[exitseven]

it is natural to want grand children.

[Brittanyroseee]

But to keep pressuring the individual about it when the individual has said time and time again how they feel, is ignoring boundaries and not respecting how the other feels.

[Brittanyroseee]

there's lots of kids in foster care they can adopt from

[exitseven]

they don;t want to adopt a kid. Instead they spend an afternoon with your kid, get them all wired up on sugar and then send them home.

[Brittanyroseee]

Yeah no thanks😂they won't be the ones taking care of it

[wkhan_87]

Parents are like that

[Brittanyroseee]

Sucks they dont respect boundaries