Is it normal to feel like I’ll never find love or happiness?

[Brokenheartedx]

always the rebound, the back burner, the last resort, used abused and hurt all my life. I'm happy for friends who have steady relationships and I wish it was me who would have someone like that. I given up on men along time ago because the few I've been with and it's less than 5 have taught me that I can give my heart to someone and they will destroy it. I work with society's most vulnerable and I treat people there how I've never been treated, kindness and respect it's a pity I never get any back. suffering from depression and bought myself a little pup to keep me company but secretly I want the adoring husband, the waking up to someone who cares about me and I know others can't make someone happy but I've been through a lot my whole life just for once I wish it was me. Is it normal to feel like this? Currently on my break at work sitting in the dark and had a cry

[Smart_Monk]

I think it is a problem when people look for love. It's like you don't care who loves you. Which already makes it dead and machine-like to begin with. At best, you'll just keep finding men who are the same - you fit to fill their void, but are replaced when a more fitting plug is found. ㅤ

[ohsheeT]

No its not .. Imagine you have a daughter.\nAnd you tell her each and every day, and she's not good enough for anybody might as well go give it up, you're going to be hurt. You're going to be used , you're going to be this that

When she hears it each and every day that's what she's going to believe , and that's who she's going to become

Just like you , you have programs yourself each and every day to become the person that you are right now

Think about this for 1 second
Today you were born today is all you have so make today. Happy a good day because then you die. So all you have is today


Yesterday is gone, yesterday is over. You're too late to change anything. It's already passed, so let it go. Whatever happened yesterday. It stays in yesterday bottom line. You can't do anything about it , so leave it there

Smile and live for today

Because tomorrow's not here yet , you're not even born yet , so you can't worry about tomorrow either

All you have is today this moment in time

Everything positive that you have ever been told. Look in the mirror and tell yourself that you love yourself and that you will get any guy that you want to. That will treat you right treat you as an equal and love you like no other

All those guys from yesterday , they're gone , it's over with for them no more , it's over

Stop brainwashing yourself, forget about yesterday. Start today all over again. Brand new and live your life and be happy for if you can do it today, you can do it for any day, but leave the past leave all that c*** behind, it's just holding you back. Can you believe it? You believe that quit brainwashing yourself , quit using propaganda on yourself , love yourself and take one step forward into today and make

You're the only person that can hold you back by believing in yesterday. Yesterday's gone, leave it there. Start brand new today. Will change your life

[PolarPoint]

Don't be angry with me, but it's partly your fault. It's because you're such a good person. That's the reason. You think about people so much, you value them more than yourself. You live your life wondering what they'll think of you. You do everything to make them happy and to be loved. But let me tell you a truth, people see you When you value them more than yourself, They noice that. and then when they notice they treat you like a slave. And they value you as much as they would a slave. It's instinctive, and unless a person has a good character, they will act on this instinct. You can divide people into two categories: people with good character and those without. People with good character will treat you well even if you value them more than yourself. People without character, on the other hand, will treat you like a slave when you value someone else more than yourself. How do you get out of this situation? There's a way out: loving yourself. And that can't be done with words alone. Look at your life; what kind of life are you really living for yourself? Are you really deserve your life or you deserv better? If you do something to improve your own life, you'll feel like you love yourself. You might not realize it at first, but when you look back and saw what you did for yourself , you'll think, "Ihave loved myself so much, I did such wonderful things for my life. so DO I" <3

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

It’s okay to not be okay.

But don’t tell yourself you’ll never find happiness or love.
We believe in words we tell ourselves.

You’ll find happiness and you’ll find love. My little tip from my own experiences is that you should be selfish… Men will tell you they don’t like selfish women… We are taught to be selfless, but once we are - we get reminded by the life that you should never putt someone else over your own happiness.

When you are happy, anyone who’s with you - will be happy… So, the only person you should be putting first, taking the best care of and loving properly - is yourself… Everyone else will take your lead…

You are loved by men just as much as you love yourself. So fall crazy in love with yourself.

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to help you untangle love, hurt, and those heavy “I’ll be alone forever” thoughts, gorgeous soul. 💔

Yes, it’s completely normal to feel this way after being the rebound, the backup, the one who gets lovebombed then ghosted. That’s trauma talking, not truth. Your kindness isn’t a curse, it’s just been invested in the wrong people.

You’re not “unlovable,” you’re exhausted and under‑appreciated. Therapy, boundaries, and healing your self-worth will filter out users and attract someone who sees you as the main character, not the last resort.

Crying on your break in the dark doesn’t make you weak, it means you’re still hoping, and that’s powerful. Your little pup, your work with vulnerable people, your huge heart… all massive green flags. The right partner will think they hit the jackpot with you. 💕

[Simslover92]

It's totally normal to feel this way and I can sort of relate to what you're going through and how you feel. A lot of people will say it's totally fine to be alone and single but the reality is for many of us, that's not what we truly want. We want to be loved and wanted. It's human nature. I believe in time you might get what you desire and I believe that I will too. Just keep hoping for it. Don't lose hope. I know this is cliché to say but it will happen when you least expect it.

[Master_Debator]

It is normal. You'll either do what it takes to stop feeling that (usually my advise is to hit the gym) or... you'll continue to feel it until you no longer feel pain about it.

Do the math. Human behavior is to avoid pain and seek pleasure. It's fucked up right now because the pain or outright rejection isn't painful enough to get people to stop eating and start lifting, or making other bad choices.

The pain is not making you seek the pleasure... probably because the path looks painful. Make your choice and move forward.

[Cyfris]

Yes it is normal.. Everyone feels rejected when rejected.. Doesn't mean you will never find someone.. there should be over a million people in the world you could live happily ever after with.. you just have to find one and both of you have to not fuck it up. Best way to do this in my opinion is to get out of the house to do something you love so the sake of doing it.. then when you start actually enjoying what you do for the sake of doing it life will happen and you will meet someone who enjoys he same thing or enjoys that you enjoy it and bam another oportunity for greatness..

[BadApple69]

You are giving mixed messages here.


“You feel like you’ll never find love”
“You’ve given up on men”
“You really wish you had a husband”


There are a lot of bad guys out there… but if you give up on them you’ll never find a husband. As for love, we can find love all around us in different forms. You said you got a puppy? A pet can show you tons of love. For me a sunset or a night sky filled with stars makes me feel alive and filled with love. If it’s a husband you want then you need to NOT give up on men. Weed through the trash and find the guys worth dating. The only way it works is if you try.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I think we all feel like that sometimes. The truth is were all a little nuts and a lot of people have a hard time believing they can trust someone. Even the cheaters.

That's why I think it's best to date with the mentality you're looking for your best friend. Someone who it would hurt them to hurt you. This measurement is easy with friends right? I think for the most part we have pretty good ideas of what it would take for a friend to leave or betray us. But when it comes to a romantic relationship it's harder isn't it?

We add on all these layers and hyper judge people too early on. And it's a bad foundation for trust.

So my advice would be to take a deep breath and try to focus on enjoying the ride of dating and even though an end goal is important to have, be careful not to obsess over it

Self reflection has taught me in my life that's what's been hurting me the most.

[Anonymous]

I get that you’re looking at the men that you’ve dated who have been probably pure POS to say the least. But how is it that kept finding the same typo of men? Perhaps it’s your personality, the type of vibe you give off. A lot of people will sit there, writing the best things about theirselves that they never did nothing. It was all him or her but never relay tell the truth. That oh I forgot I’m also argumentative, I get really jealous, I don’t cook, I don’t clean, I don’t do this or that. That’s not to say you have to do everything the other person isn’t to. Meaning if he likes choking women while having sex no I’m not saying well that’s on you cause you don’t let him do it. What’s your home life like with your mom and dad? What was their relationship like?

[Brokenheartedx]

I have my flaws like everybody else, I'm not perfect and won't pretend to be. Maybe I look for the good in everyone and give people to many chances and they think I'm a pushover.
My home life was my dad being abusive to me and my sisters, he would hit us or pull us by the hair, he barely spoke to my mum and would use us to say tell your mum this or that when she was standing right next to him.

[Opinion Owner]

So maybe that’s a big part of the reason why you attract men like this. I mean no one, ma or woman goes out in public saying I want a partner who is abusive, who treats me like crap, etc, etc. But some how people who’ve been through those things tend to find those same types of partners. Growing up like this to you may have been normal. Maybe you said no this isn’t moms. But to a lot of people growing up like that they thought it was normal. The men you’ve met, are they similar to your dad? How was your mom’s responses to your dad when he treated her like this? Did she just take it? What about your sisters? Are they in good relationships or are they similar to you?

[Brokenheartedx]

My mum didn't do anything, when he was hitting us or pulling our hair she was out.. She only knew the extent years later and she cried about it. We were only kids, the only 1 who still talks to my father is my older sister. My oldest sister is married to a man 5 years younger than her she seems settled. The rest of us have been abused by men we thought were out partners

[Opinion Owner]

Did the oldest go through the abuse as well or was she already out of the house by than?
So yes sounds like a lot of what you’re exporting is coming from what you witnessed or went through yourself by your father. You ever sought therapy? I mean looking at your pic you’re not that bad looking. But too I wonder ok if you got w a man who actually treated you like a partner, was nice, loving, made you a priority, would you know what to do in that kind of relationship? Or would you find a way to sabotage it cause it wasn’t “normal” to you. In past relationships when these men treated you bad, did you ever think to yourself you deserved to be treated that way?

[Kaneki05]

Reality is whom you date is up to you. You are a girl nvm attractive you could pick many men but keep picking bad ones. Look for the red flags better, or don't look for someone you think is perfect as that is the red flag within it self.
It's not your fault if the guy treats you wrong but there is fault in always choosing the wrong guy somehow. Because that somehow is more on you.

[madhatters4]

i think it is relatively normal to feel like you'll never find love/happiness. i know at points in my life i've felt that way too

i know you're not really asking for dating/love advice but i wouldn't give up. i would just try to really think and reflect on past relationships. are there similarities in those relationship/in those guys that perhaps you can learn from and take with you into new relationships?

[exitseven]

It is really sad you feel like that. After you get out of school it is hard to meet people for a relationship. Luck or maybe chance plays a role in this but you can make the odds more favorable for you. Try to expand your circle of friends and try to get involved with some activities you are interested in. Try to be more interesting. Explore something you are passionate about.

I know it is not easy but like anything else in life, it takes work.

[MannMitAntworten]

No it is not unusual. A lot of singles probably feel that way Hell, some of us have just gotten used to being single to the point where getting involved seems almost insane. Me being one of them. my dating past kicks rocks. Like your friends went to pair you off. For me it’s hell no! Been burned on that path way too many times.

[genericname85]

well you may never find love but you can always find happiness. finding love involves you finding someone to agree with what you want to do with them. you have no power over other people. but happiness comes from within yourself and you do have the power above yourself.

[genericname85]

like "love" (in the sense that you mean with a partner) can't exist without love from the outside (other person). but you don't need anyhing outside of yourself to be happy.

[Anonymous]

Well the odds aren't with you at this point but that doesn't mean it's not possible. The question is what have you done wrong to this point. Are you looking outside your league? Are you a man's peace when you are with him? Do you understand boundaries. All of these are crucial to success. Also understand that MOST people I relationships are not happy. Social media, and probably your friends as well lie to you. Most people where a mask and pretend to be happier then they are.

[Brokenheartedx]

U mean do I look for men who are a 10 to my 5? No I'm not a lookist I prefer personality. Yes I understand boundaries where I don't bombard someone with messages and generally get the hint if a message is being ignored. I'm a quiet person I'm not loud or a trouble causer.

[Opinion Owner]

"I prefer a personality". That might be your Achilles heel. What you call a "personality" might be a well practiced approach. Some men are good at it. And a lot of women are ONLY attracted to men who approach them. So if they ONLY get approached by users, guess what's going to happen. It's possible you don't evaluate men very well.

[Brokenheartedx]

So I have to approach men?

[Opinion Owner]

It might help, but no. Most guys will approach women if they're properly stimulated to do so. Problem is most women would rather chew off their own arm then show any real interest in a guy. This is why good men avoid most good women. They get flirted with by all the terrible women who just like watching the guys reaction. Which only makes the good woman's job harder. Because after being burned enough he isn't going to do it without good reason.
So I'm trying to tell you at your age your job will be harder now the less you want to put yourself out there. And the guys at this point have less reason to respond. Conversely a user has nothing to lose. Sorry, I don't make the rules.

[Brokenheartedx]

The message me for months and having been burned before I eventually agree to meet them, we get on good but minute sex is involved that's it.. Im treated as if I'm a game or notch on bedpost and I think why bother messaging me for months to go ghost or hurt me and it's now become I don't trust any man. it's not a nice feeling to have not being good enough but when it's happened twice in a row I genuinely think it is me that's the problem, am I ugly, am I not good enough, I even thought about getting a boob job to get a man to like me that's where I am at now

[Opinion Owner]

So don't give them sex. If that's the cycle, break the cycle. You don't think you're good enough without sex?

[Bricealan]

@brokenheartedx you are certainly young enough to NOT feel that way. It is easy to feel that way in the current state of our society. There are good people out there, but many are afraid to commit, sorry to say.

[Nikki1989]

Your brain begins to safeguard you by anticipating the worst. It’s a defence mechanism, not a prophecy.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

If your happiness is contingent on the actions of other people, you will never be happy. And romance is overrated, being alone rocks in my personal opinion.

[GrammariklyIncorrekt]

Part of dating is potentially breaking up. It sucks when you're committed but the feeling isn't mutual. Try to not get too beat up over it. Just mentally prepare yourself that the one you're dating might not be "the one".

[FreyaRed]

Love and happiness is like looking for perfection, if you find it, you recognize relatively soon that it's just your imagination

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Its normal because you have been broken multiple times already.

Love still can find you but you have to go about it the right way.

Maybe a bit slower next time to see if a man is serious about loving you.

[LiamJHayden]

Perhaps, but that is too much pressure. Just go have fun doing things you enjoy. If something more happens, great, but if not that is fine, too.

[qwerty2469]

I've been married for 20 years. Some of them happily. From what I'm reading there is a loneliness epidemic in both men and women. Even in the younger age groups. I do think it is normal, but do not think it is acceptable.

[najekim]

From what I have experienced, both for myself and with my friends, finding that special someone comes when you're not actively looking.

[Brokenheartedx]

I've been hurt to much. Everytime I think wow he actually likes me because he's genuinely wanting to meet me and that pursuit can go on months.. I end up meeting a few times and then he's gone and I do take it personally because when it happens a few times I think it's because I'm not good enough and it's kicking my self esteem. is it because I'm ugly/horrible body, boring and I round it up to being just not good enough. I wish they wouldn't ghost and be honest and tell me what it is that they don't like about me so I can work on it

[Mike_Hum]

sounds like you have to fix your mental issues first before you can expect someone else in your life. You need to make yourself happy first.

[dudeinohio]

You go through several relationships throughout your life. Don't give up. All it takes is one person for that dream relationship.

[Bklynbadboy12]

I think a lot of people feel that way now a days. We live in a hook up culture very few people really want a relationship now. It's sad but that's reality we live in

[jahaims]

If you haven't figured it out by now you are probably just too stupid to figure it out

[LC75LC71]

That is straight up to you and no one else. If you're not receptive, then what's the point?

[Staximus]

Just learn how to pick better guys

[kerem2NT]

Good people always win.

[eagle1951]

sometimes we all think that once in awhile

[Danny_dan92]

Welcome to 2026

[AgentG111]

Absolutely