Relationships
2 mo

Should I wait for my long-distance boyfriend or am I being naive?

We’ve known each other 3 years and been dating 2. We went long distance 6 months ago after he had to relocate for work following job loss. Before that, our relationship was very strong—constant communication, normal ups and downs, but overall the healthiest relationship I’ve had. Others can see how much he loves me.


Two weeks ago, he told me he resigned. I asked for a call, but he said he was having panic attacks and felt “screwed.” The next day he repeated he was overwhelmed, anxious, and needed time. After 2 days I called him. He said he had shut down mentally, had no plan, and was low on funds. He apologized for not telling me properly and for going quiet. He also said he feels ashamed for impulsively resigning (he has done this before). He still said “I love you” during the call and seemed emotional.


It’s now been 9 days of complete silence. I haven’t reached out because I wanted to give him space, but I’m starting to feel anxious and like I’m grieving the relationship.


Before this, he has questioned whether he should be with me because he feels unable to provide as a man. He also has significant debt from a legal case in his home country. He is still legally married, though he said he was waiting for citizenship before handling separation paperwork. With his job loss, relocation, and unstable work situation, the future we planned feels uncertain.


My questions:


Should I continue waiting for him to reach out, or should I contact him again?
Am I being naive for still believing this relationship can work under these circumstances?

Should I wait for my long-distance boyfriend or am I being naive?
Post Opinion