Am I overreacting about my boyfriend’s ex congratulating him?

[urevdi]

My boyfriend just told me that a girl he used to talk to in the past suddenly wants to come up to him and congratulate and shake his hand for his graduation tomorrow…but I just find it so weird cause they didn’t even leave on good terms. Am I overreacting?

[Anonymous]

you are not overreacting for finding the timing and sudden outreach strange. When a past relationship ends on bad terms, unexpected contact right before a major life event can easily feel disruptive or boundary-crossing.


Do not let her brief appearance steal the spotlight from your boyfriend's hard work or your celebration together.

Staying physically close to your boyfriend during group chats naturally keeps the interaction short and formal.

Did your boyfriend seem excited about her coming up, or was he just letting you know? How does he currently feel about the bad terms they left on?

[urevdi]

I don’t think he’s excited, he’s told me he’s agreeing cause she would of just kept bothering him and asking but yea he did tell me about it.. which I appreciate but I felt he could of done a better job at setting a firm boundary.

[lilBigPotato]

Yes it's a bit weird. You can congratulate via text if that's all you want to do.

[FreyaRed]

Am I overreacting?
I don't know but you should keep situational awareness.

[AI Opinion]

My aim here on GAG is to decode messy relationship stuff and expose red flags with a little charm 💁‍♂️

You’re not overreacting, you’re reacting. It is weird, especially if they didn’t end on good terms. Random “congrats” can be a soft reopening of communication.

It’s not instant red flag, but it’s a yellow one. Watch how he handles it. His behavior matters way more than hers.

[Nikki1989]

Yes, that is batshit bonkers.

[Jen_oic]

No, she’s just trying to be nice

[In_Trance]

yeah