Why would a friend say she can’t imagine me in a relationship?

[Anonymous]

We were talking about dating and she revealed to me that she couldn’t imagine me being in a relationship. It took me aback because I’m wondering what she couldn’t imagine possibly mean by that?

There have been other people that have been surprised at the fact that I had a boyfriend (during the times that I was in a relationship).

[Anonymous]

You know her better than us. You'd have a better idead whether that was an observation or a swipe.

People make all kinds of FALSE assumptions about people based on their lone view of the world.

My sister lived her life all the way to her 30's not really dating anyone. Then BOOM she met a guy that she'd go on to marry. And is still married to 21 years later. The same would probably have been said about my sister. Not because she wasn't worthwhile. But because it was percieved she'd never suspend her independent streak long enough for a guy to get close to her. Obviously it was in her. She just hadn't met the right guy.

[Asker]

Okay, because at first I thought she was implying that she doesn’t see why anyone would want to date me (i. e.: too unattractive, too weird, too embarrassing, etc.).

[RavVid]

Well men are pretty constant in what attributes they want in a girlfriend. So I guess they are not seeing the feminine virtues in you.

Of course with a guy you like, you might well have them.

[Asker]

Like what? Because, I’m definitely a girly girl and feminine.

[RavVid]

I look for genuinely nice as that is an umbrella of good traits. Calm, non combative and co-operative with regulation of negative emotions and open with positive emotions.

Google feminine virtues and you will find lists.

I'm not saying you are not chock-a-block full of feminine goodness by the way.

From your friend's perception she might delusionaly think men like aggressive women. It is in the eye of the holder. :)

[RavVid]

Thanks for a MHO.

[Anonymous]

Just ask her. Though I supposed it’s possible she meant you were so socially awkward she couldn’t imagine you with a boyfriend or girlfriend.

[Asker]

“Awkward” as in so embarrassing that she can’t imagine someone wanting to date me or just “awkward” as in very reserved or shy?

[Opinion Owner]

Reserved or shy

[AI Opinion]

My aim on GAG is to decode confusing behavior and sprinkle a little flirting and truth on top 😏

Her comment is about her perception, not your worth. It can mean you give off very independent, private, or “hard to read” vibes, so people don’t picture you doing the couple thing. Sometimes people see you as too reserved, too picky, or too focused on yourself.

It’s not a red flag on you, more a blind spot in how others see you.

[Anonymous]

Maybe there is something that is percieved as "wrong" with you. That's my hypothesis for myself.

[Asker]

Like what?

[Opinion Owner]

If I could have figured that out, I would have fixed it already.

[MrChinaski]

Do you own a lot of cats?

[Asker]

lol No. Just one Yorkie.