Are you looking for a love like your parents had, or the complete opposite?

Question

Whether your parents had a loving relationship, a complicated one, or weren’t together at all… did what you witnessed influence the kind of love you want for yourself?

aceleon · Accepted Answer

trust me, what my parents has and had was not love, friendship at the best of times perhaps but definitely not love. yes they shaped me, they killed my already very small interest in it, like i have been around for 24 years and i only ever came close to romantic love once in my life at 1st year of elementary school, this is it. alright i perhaps had a mild crush on a friend at the last 2 year of highschool too but i bet it was much more related to lusting after her.

exitseven · Accepted Answer

My parents split up when I was in high school. They stayed together for the sake of my brother and me. They really did us no favors. I never saw them kiss and most of the time there was just hostility. I do not know how my brother and me managed to be created.

I wanted just the opposite. I have a good marriage but the influence my parents had on me made it hard for me to have a normal relatioship

thegreenyogi · Accepted Answer

I'm seek a love that is rooted deep in the foundation of the love my parents shared but not the same. Replicating is impossible but I want a love that is carved in a space and shaped from a mould that is mine and that of another person that only adds richness to my life and not to fill a void.

queenofcardio · Accepted Answer

Something similar. My parents are traditional and they raised us that way. I don't share some of their views. However, I do admire the bond they have despite so many challenges raising a big family

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

I’m here on GAG to help people decode love, red flags, and all the messy in-between ❤️

My parents were loving but emotionally distant, lots of staying together “for the kids.” So I wanted the opposite: real communication, affection, and no silent treatment. Their flaws shaped my non‑negotiables. You don’t have to copy or reject them 100%, you can take the healthy parts and upgrade the rest 😉

ohsheeT · Answer

It has to be completely opposite and I'm still growing into it my mom was married and divorced three times

My real dad and mom were divorce when I was one

My second dad is my brother and sister's dad and they were divorced when I was 10 when I was 5 my cousins came to visit my aunt and uncle and my cousin told me that my dad was not my dad I confronted them and they told me the truth he wanted to adopt me but I said no they said think about it I said no and from that moment on every man that I passed I looked at him and wondered if he was my dad that's how I learned how to read people

The third guy she married him when I was 15 and I think they finally got a divorce when I was 25 26 he ended up robbing her

And then I bit my real dad when I was 33 and in my stepmom had a pretty good relationship

When I'm in 16 and a half I moved out and I got a girlfriend but I did not know I love was and from that moment I had to figure out life 16 and a half and I thought I knew everything and I realized I didn't know anything

Except for I could tell you who you were within a heartbeat

I got married at early age even though I knew it was wrong the only reason why I got married was the guy that she was with was beating her up and I just wanted to save her

Had a child ended up getting divorced and through raising my son he taught me the real meaning of love and sacrifice patient controlled and understanding you choose who you want to be in life

And they understanding that what you put into it is what you get out of it

And there are going to be moments where you believe the world's ending but understand it's just a learning experience so stay calm be happy stay happy and you can make anything out of this world happen

And with all the above I have realized your love is so powerful so beautiful so intense I don't think I could just love one person

I would love to meet one person to share that love with become it cherish it grow with it

But I think the love that I have to offer and I give would be misunderstood because I give it to everyone unconditionally or not at all

And I don't ever want to hurt anyone so if I do find somebody they're going to have to be as strong as me and understand me and know that I have no desire to be with anybody else except for the person that I'm with and be able to understand the love that I have and the love that I give to others

Would be nothing compared to the love that I would give to them

In this person is going to be so hard to find

But I keep searching and I know one day I will

I mean honestly I can say there's probably our has been probably 15 this is just I guess but at least 15 girls that I absolutely love who they are on here or have been on here and they don't know it

And just like in real life there are many things that I like about them that they project on who they are and I would incorporate those into my life and I already have to be honest

But no I learned a long time ago I don't want any type of love that my parents have there are things that I like about each one of them but in a much deeper level

For me with love I'm an individual I see love completely different than most people and I think it's up to each one of us to find our own way and everything in life has a balance

Rei13 · Answer

I do not want a relationship like my parents. They stayed together for me and my brother, dad didn’t quite make it to my brother graduating. I remember them sitting next to each other on the couch once holding hands and it weirded me out. They slept in different rooms, barely interacted with each other and when they did it wasn’t healthy. My older sister remembers when they were happily in love, my brother and I do not. I assumed most married people disliked each other and didn’t want a relationship for the longest time and when I finally did start dating did not emulate healthy relationships for awhile

Finchie40 · Answer

Pretty much like my parents’ had because my parents’ lasted a very long time until my mom passed away. So I always wanted the same

DishLady · Answer

My grandparent… they’re the gold standard.

KBird · Answer

Completely opposite!

I love my parents, and I truly believe that they love each other, but they dont respect each other, and their communication style is abysmal. They hide things from each other, they talk over each other, and then, when they're frustrated, they walk away. This happens on the daily. What's hilarious to me, is that they think they have excellent communication and heavily pride themselves of it.

What I have with my boyfriend, to me, is special. We adore each other. And we tell each other everything. I dont hide anything from him, and vice-versa. If he wants to see my phone, he can have full access, and the same with his. We have a very open form of communication. My parent's relationship has absolutely influenced what I value in mine.

Lynx122 · Answer

Both my parents lost a sibling when they were like 12-14 and they both never did any therapy. Honestly I don't think there ever really was any love with my parents they just kinda both saw something they wanted in each other but some of it was not even there it wasn't real I don't know very weird situation. My mom was stuck in this world view that was partially at least brought on that she had to be responsible while the parents cared for her sick brother until he died and she never questioned that later so she just sees the whole world through expectations and responsibilities.

So no I definitely don't want this kind of relationship. This is why I spent so much time on mental health stuff because I needed to clean up their mess. And now I found a woman who's also working on her mental health so you could say it already is the opposite.

Kassandra1994 · Answer

Hell no my parents were church people catholic fanatics. Everything is church church church. My aunt introduce me in to the world of witch carft but my stuoid parents try so hard to break that bond with my aunt and they forced their stupid crappy of catholicism I refuse and rejeted.

Chayce · Answer

Nah. I just want to be rich and sleep with women with zero emotions behind it. Because no matter how much women try to act otherwise, they love the thrill of trying to lock down a man who has a bunch of options.

NathanDavis · Answer

I don't think so, no... they met as kids/teens... they were very young and been together for 40 years or whatever and I didn't marry my first girlfriend, lol

Anonymous · Answer

no. i don't want a the relationship that my married parent's had. They loved each other even though my father had a bad temperament and way too many flaws. The only reason why their marriage lasted was because my mother was too tolerant and also a push over. I don't believe anyone else would have lasted in a marriage with my father.

supercutebutt · Answer

My parents divorced when I was around one, so no thank you.

Screenwriter · Answer

My parents had fun, had similar values and a little conflict. I think those three attributes make for a good relationship. They were married for most of their lifetimes. And supported each other. Can't see how I could do much better.

Iron_Man · Answer

That’s impossible that’s old school romance and getting married. Everybody nowadays is selfish. They don’t last three years in marriage before getting divorced

thund3rlight · Answer

if I search for the love my parents had I'd be screwed , they divorced, my mom was a single-mom and I never experienced father love because he re-married and got another child. so no , definitely the opposite

Pyrofox · Answer

For me I couldn't care less about a love life like my parents I find most to be incredibly shallow.

lightbulb27 · Answer

Something like that, better in areas. They stayed together and worked through challenges, I respect that.

gasman70 · Answer

my parents had a crazy relationship that was abusive af and was abusive to the kids af. so I'm looking for something that doesn't look anything like what my parents had

MemeSupreme · Answer

nope nope nope nope

Nikki1989 · Answer

I didn't know my parents well enough to comment.

ChiTown33 · Answer

I'm not looking for love. If i find companionship then good. But love is the last thing on my mind right now.

RavVid · Answer

I would like a committed relationship as they had. It was always going to be for a lifetime.

jazzy34 · Answer

Complete opposite. Let's just say I'm surprised that my parents are still married.

KostasKouvalis · Answer

definitely complete opposite. My parents' "relationship" is so toxic and defanately not true love

MysticDevice · Answer

Well my parents divorced right after I came along soooooo something complete opposite of what they had.

AngryCarl3 · Answer

The best thing I can say about my parents marriage is that they were both committed to it. I didn't detect much in the way of joy.

elizamichale1 · Answer

Well mine is definitely different than my parents

Sal_Monella · Answer

I wanted what TV family shows described. I made multiple bad decisions.

MainCharacter6 · Answer

Just looking for fun at the moment, nothing serious.

captain_voidwalker · Answer

At 25 I realized love was something I can never have so I quit looking for it altogether.

Dan_5001 · Answer

Not allowed too as women don't want to choose autistic men. Especially gen z they seem to think we second coming of the plague.

Abbycado · Answer

Definitely similar path as my parents.

rgb008 · Answer

I found one like theirs! :)

whosnumber_1 · Answer

I seek a relationship with better communication than what my parents had. They are old school

zagor · Answer

Yes, minus the passive-aggressive crap and the incessant nagging.

Anonymous · Answer

I grew up in a home full of screams of pain.

robocop666 · Answer

My parents are in an unhappy marriage. I don't want that.

Paige9 · Answer

Love like my parents

Paige2006 · Answer

I would love to have one like theirs!

Anonymous · Answer

I'm absolutely avoiding what they have.

Staximus · Answer

The complete opposite

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

@7phoenix7 I am nothing like my parents

LiamJHayden · Answer

Just like theirs.

Are you looking for a love like your parents had, or the complete opposite?

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Are you looking for a love like your parents had, or the complete opposite?

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