You start off by saying that you're not conceited but you then go on to say that you yourself believe that you are narcissistic and then follow up with you love to look at yourself and have others look at you to give you that boost that you so desperately need. I do say you need it because it seems no matter what your intentions are with that girl you want her to want you. You go out of your way to seek that attention to assure yourself that you're still wanted by all.
"I don't do it on purpose, or not consciously anyway." Yet you again try to test or see how many women will respond or flock to you.
" I guess my point is that there are no malicious or manipulative intentions." I'm not sure of that. Are you sure? I mean if you really wanted it and were pushed to that point of one day no one seemed to notice you...Can you really say you wouldn't? You already seek it out from strangers by going out of your way it seems. Not just by merely observing.
"It's all just done for the greater glory of my own ego." Again, your ego.
This could be broken down into many things of why you want and need that but I'm unsure if you would accept or even acknowledge it if those reason be valid as to why you feel and do the things that you do.
I mean...Everyone needs to be loved, right?
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Odd Random question...when's your birthday?
I think you sound fine - just have an ego to fill. I'm the same exact way, it's almost scary reading your description!
I love the attention, adoration, and being in the spotlight as the " hot " one or whatever. I constantly look out to see who's checking me out, if there's a group of guys I'm going to pass, I'll put a little sway in my hips and listen for one of them to be like, " damn babe girl!"
xD
I love compliments and I have to humble myself to avoid it all going to my head. I love mirrors and any reflective surfaces, I constantly look at myself as I walk past glass windows too make sure I'm still looking good. It's bad, I even do this on days when I don't honestly feel like I'm that hot. But I've never declared myself to be ugly, that reality is impossible to me...
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Ok I'm not a psych major but I am currently taking a college level psych class. If you have ever herd of the Humanistic approach of psych it basically says that we all strive to be the best person we can or that we seek to be our version of perfect. Everyone sees perfect in different ways. Maybe for you being wanted makes you feel closer to perfect. In addition its not abnormal to I guess you could say want to be wanted, everyone wants to be accepted, you just can't let it consume you. Once you find one girl that really makes genuinely happy you won't need all the other random girls attention, that's just my opinion.
your insecure and worried that no one is going to want you the way you want or feel you deserve
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