My boyfriend proposed!! The thing is, I'm only 17.

[Anonymous]

Okay, before anything I wanted to state I'm 18 in September. My boyfriend's been 18 since May. Last night, he got down on one knee and asked me to marry him. "I've loved you for so long." "I don't want anyone else." "i need you to be my wife." He said things like this in his proposal. It kind of scared me, to be honest. He wants me to say yes because we're both going to different colleges on the other side of the country and he wants to show me how committed he'll be to me. I *do* love him, but it's strange to be thinking of marriage so early. What is your opinion on all this?

[Anonymous]

I loved my boyfriend in HS too, but we weren't meant for 'forever'. You may not find that out til a few years down the road. You are both still discovering who you are and right now don't have a very realistic idea of what you will want and need from a man 5-10 years down the road, when it would be an appropriate time to get married. Don't rush it, getting married too young does no one any favors and is the cause of a lot of unhealthy/unhappy relationships. How long have you been dating? Don't ask for a promise ring either, if you are meant to stay together through your college experience, then BF/GF should be enough to get you there. I strongly advice you to not accept his proposal at this time.

[Anonymous]

I think it depends on the situation (because some young marriages CAN work!), but since it scared you, maybe you're not ready. And maybe he's not ready either, he just thinks he is, haha.

I think it would be better if you wait. Tell him that you guys can be committed without taking such a huge step. Say that you feel that you're too young and just not ready yet. If he loves you, he will understand and want you to be ready and comfortable when that special time comes.

Hope it goes well for you. :)

[xHoneyxBeex]

Probably way too young. You don't need a marriage proposal to stay committed to each other. If you really care about each other then you'll both stay committed anyway. Even being married, your relationship could still not work. Going to college far away from your partner is extremely difficult. It was very hard for me and my boyfriend was only an hour away from my college! You're young, people change as they get older, especially in college. I would highly advise against marriage.

[Anonymous]

Yikes. I was in love like he was at his age once too and wanted nothing more then to marry that girl. Well, we broke up in college and I fell in love again with someone I wanted nothing more to marry after her. Well, we broke up after college and I yet again found love and someone I wanted nothing more to marry. Strike 3 and I'm out! Sure it's always wonderful to want to hold onto your first love, but I have been in love now three times into my adult life. Just take your time and don't rush things.

[Lafemmedeschats]

Haha very true although I wouldn't give up on finding a mate!

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry, but if you guys were smart, you would have made sure you went to colleges that were close. Relationships like this fail ALL THE TIME. If you both feel the same about each other...and are deeply deeply in love...it could work. It will be miserable being apart in every way. Did you say yes?

[Asker]

No. I didn't, I feel as if I'm too young to make that commitment.

[Opinion Owner]

Age is just a number. Just because you say yes, dosn't mean you can't change your mind in 4 years. He was basically proposing...hoping that you would promise not to date anyone else in college. He should have offered you a promise ring.

[Lafemmedeschats]

My first reaction was to scorn you for bring naive. But I've met a few, a FEW, a very select and mature FEW which had a scenario like this work out. My advice would be to not tie yourself down at such a young age and enjoy being a child for the time you can. I'm finding with each year that I regret not doing so myself.

[ArabianPwincess197]

Ask him to give you a promise ring. Tell him you love him too. Give him a significant gift. Tell him what's on your mind. Say you want to focus on your education at the moment you feel too young to settle down but you love him and if you want to marry someone it will be him.

[cheesesteak7]

Marriage at 18 is questionable at best. Marriage at 18 while living 1000s of miles apart is just plain not very well thought out and pretty shortsighted.

[snowangle]

That's too young to get married, but there's nothing wrong with staying engaged for a few years. You have the rest of your lives to be married, so there's really no rush.

[kambo_trick3y]

Don't do it, the whole thing is incredibly brash, incredibly stupid.

[angrychick]

Tell him if he really loves you he can wait a couple years.

[Anonymous]

It's beyond stupid. Even if he doesn't know any better, you should.

[Asker]

Who said I didn't know better? I said the proposal scared me, and it's strange to be thinking of marriage so early.

[bassman]

As a couple, why did you decide to go to school far far away then?

[Asker]

Because we're trying to pursue different goals, at different places. I don't think it's your job to tell me whether my relationship can survive long distance.

[jacquesvol]

Too young, too early.

First get a degree,then a job, then a house, then marry.

[Anonymous]

Far, far too young.