Should I be worried? Boyfriend invited me to a wedding, then uninvited me?

[Anonymous]

We have been together 10 months. We do everything together. He is playing in the band at his good friend's wedding. He was invited to the wedding before he met me.

But 3 weeks ago his friend (the bride) told him to invite me to the wedding.

I said yes, but did not expect an invitation as I did not know them. He seemed happy about it.

1 week before the wedding, he went silent about it and just uninvited me saying there would be no where for me to stay and that it would be awkward.

I just accepted it, said that's fine, but thought to myself, I don't really understand why it would be awkward. I knew he was lying.

Confusingly I realised the bride's sister is my boyfriend's ex. His ex was a bridesmaid at the wedding.

Obviously I don't care about the wedding, but as the bride invited me herself, don't get why he uninvited me and made up some crap excuse and I felt it was really rude and quite hurtful.

When he was at the wedding, he started texting me that he wished I was there. I just ignored him for the whole of the weekend. And now he's having a go at me for ignoring him, telling me to tell him what's wrong.

So he uninvites me and then starts saying he wants me there.

I don't get it.

Should I be worried by this behaviour, is it to do with his ex, or was he just being an idiot. Am I overreacting?

Thanks

[Anonymous]

I think you're overreacting. I mean understand why you feel the way you do but you have to be considerate of his feelings too. Or even his ex girlfriend's feelings. If you guys were together longer I'd totally agree with you. New girl around old girl is very awkward and a wedding is no place for that. You are not the only one with feelings that matter.

Talk to him about it. Let him know how much it bothered you. Being passive aggressive gets you no where.

[Asker]

I understand all that, but why then did either of them invite me. Surely they should have thought about all that before inviting me. I know that my feelings aren't the only ones, but I don't think it's fair to say I have to feel for his ex. She cheated on him and broke up with him.
I agree I shouldn't be passive aggressive, and need to talk to him about it. Thanks

[Anonymous]

Your boyfriend is not in charge of the guest list at a wedding or how the rooms are allocated. Without knowing anything more, I think you're over reacting.

[Asker]

I know he isn't in charge the bride is though and it was her who invited me, not him. She even asked after the wedding why he didn't bring me.

[Opinion Owner]

If the bride invited you, then you could have taken your invite and gone. No matter what your boyfriend said.

Either you had an invite, or you didn't. Either you had an invite, or you were someone elses plus one.

Your story doesn't make much sense.