Polls: Relationships

Here are two ways your relationship ends:

- Either they've been cheating on you the whole time and were full of lies or they future faked you with false promises for you (ex: a boyfriend deliberately stringing along his girlfriend with false promises of marriage and kids, making her wait years and in the end tell her the truth that he never had intentions), took money from you and never returned it, etc. After years of being together, you've discovered they are eiter cheaters or users. Your time was wasted. You suffered a terrible heartbreak. They aren't the person you thought they were. They're a total lie. You go permanent NC with them and they're dead in your eyes. You never want to see nor hear from them ever again.

- You're in a great relationship (youthful love), in the honeymoon phase, both of you are in love and even talk about the future of possibly getting married and having kids after finishing college and graduate school. You both want to be financially stable for the future. Just then, a tragedy takes place and your partner dies. It can be from an car accident, from getting run over, from an explosion, an illness or them dying saving your life (the ultimate sacrifice). Since up to the moment you never had any arguments with them, you're left never knowing how the relationship would've finished or if you would've ended up having kids with them later on.

This is a topic I’ve been thinking about a lot lately because every time it comes up, people seem to have completely opposite opinions on it.

Whenever I ask my friends, some say it’s entirely possible, while others insist it’s impossible because one person always ends up catching feelings. It made me wonder why this dynamic is so complicated.

Growing up in a small town, every guy-girl friendship was scrutinized. If I had a guy friend, people speculated we were dating; if a male friend hung out with my female group, people instantly assumed he was gay, even when he wasn't. Movies and TV only reinforce this by framing every cross-sex friendship as a slow-burn romance. Even as kids, harmless friendships were teased as "crushes," creating awkwardness for no reason.

Despite all that, I’ve always had male friends and firmly believe men and women CAN be real, lasting friends. Research backs this up—studies show "friendship attraction" is often much stronger in these bonds than physical attraction. Guys get a safe space to open up emotionally, and girls get an honest look into how men think. While my deepest connections have been with female friends, I think that was mostly due to societal pressure pushing us to stay in same-gender groups.

For me, feelings only pop up at the very beginning when you barely know each other. As time passes, catching feelings actually becomes harder because you know the person too well. I've never caught feelings for a friend, and I don't see it happening. Platonic friendships work seamlessly—as long as both people have emotional maturity, clear boundaries, and avoid mixed signals or using each other for emotional validation.

I really want to hear your personal experiences: Do you have genuine friends of the opposite sex, or has attraction always ruined things for you?

Vote in the poll below and leave your thoughts in the comments!

If you knew a relationship would definitely end in a year for whatever reason, would you still pursue it?

What parts of yourself would you hold back on purpose?

So.. I feel like people always say love should be 50/50, (and I agree…) but I don’t think it always works out that perfectly lol.

Sometimes one person is just a little more attached, expressive, or invested than the other.

So if you had to choose, would you rather be the one who loves more, or the one who is loved more?

Last night he talked to me saying he could never be with someone like me again and called me mentally challenged when I’m not and called me a slut when not. I want to actually be serious and be a mom one day and many people that are decent said to me that I should be able to have kids one day and that I will be an amazing mother. He’s been with me for 6 years and is questioning my abilities and saying someone like me shouldn’t be a mother because I’m too mentally challenged to and won’t know how to take care of a kid which is not true. Is he right? He told me right in my face to get my tubes tied because I’m not right in the head and told me no one would never would want to be with me. This made me upset and haven’t spoken to him since. This isn’t true right and he’s an asshole and ignorant right?