"Only in the leap from the lion's head will he prove his worth." - Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade.
Ok, so not off to a great start on that having faith thing, huh? You trusted me when I said non-religious approach to faith and then I quote a movie where they are trying to find the Holy Grail. I counter with the following though, Monty Python did a movie about the Holy Grail and nobody is confusing that for the scripture, so just let me have this lead in, alright?
The inspiration for this MyTake was from a very close friend who confessed to being afraid to try intimacy with someone they care about because they wanted to work on perceived flaws within themselves first. I tried to convince them that nobody is ever going to be perfect going into anything and there is no such thing as having every single contingency planned out. Life is way too imperfect to even allow for such planning. As I continued the conversation though, I thought about my own fears and how I have allowed them to cripple me for years. It made me feel like a hypocrite telling someone I care about not to be worried while sitting in the safety of a darkened room.
I have a laundry list of phobias (more on that in a moment), but as of late, I have really let a few of them completely take over my life. I am pretty sure I am a certifiable mess when it comes to fears, but just to name a few, I am afraid of: flying, losing control of my mental faculties, anything happening to my eyes, being penetrated in any way really, public speaking, being seen, being a burden, being a failure at things I try, germs, porcelain dolls, sleeping with open doors/windows and birds.
Now you would think the bird fear would be the one keeping me inside, but those feathery bastards haven't won just yet. In my case, the being seen thing is what does it for me. I hate how I look and I automatically assume others feel the same when they see me, even when they say they don't. In fact, the only reason I include my photo on this site is so that I am forced to keep my opinions honest and not hidden by anonymity. Over the years, this has become so overwhelming that I can add agoraphobia to my list. It is getting really hard to find the willpower to leave the house and be out in public which really sucks for my poor kids who want to escape from this house from time to time. So, now that we have my fears out of the way, let's get to some faith, shall we?
I know some of my fears are irrational, most are, but most of my early life was spent outdoors despite there being more birds around than a New York Giants v Philadelphia Eagles football game (Or maybe Liverpool v Manchester United for my friends across the pond? I don't know football over there so don't hate me if I got this wrong, ok?). I have flown several times for both business and vacations. Once kids entered the picture, I had to stop locking my bedroom door when it was time to sleep. The fears never went away for me, so, if the fears are there then why was I ok with compromising on some of these, but not others? Sure, some may be based out of necessity, but in others it was just a leap of faith that it will be ok until it wasn't. There has to be a reason why I could overcome some of these and live my life. I mean, nobody walks outside expecting to run into an army of porcelain dolls so clearly I can go outside and just walk around the park and not care what people think of me, right?
I questioned myself after talking to my friend and immediately told him I was going to write this with his permission. If he is so scared to try finding intimacy out of fear of failure, who am I to tell him to just try it and everything will be ok? Don't get me wrong, that is exactly what I said, but I hate being a liar or a hypocrite. So here is my promise to him and to everyone else out there fighting your own fears of one kind or another, it is time I practice what I preach when it comes to a lot of my fears. I am going to start taking back my life and I want to open dialogue with those here who face their own and need help working through it. I am very aware that taking that leap of faith has a VERY real chance of failing, but it also has a very real chance of succeeding as well. As Wayne Gretzky once said, "You miss 100% of the shots you don't take".
So, dear reader, what kinds of fears do you face on an every day basis, but find yourself making compromises with and which ones are completely crippling to you? Of those crippling ones, which ones can you tell yourself today to take your own leap of faith and try to do them regardless of the fear? I'd love to hear from you in the comments and just talk with you about those fears and what leaps of faith you have taken or will take.
Just remember this is meant to help people come to face their fears and take chances, not to tease anyone on those fears, so let's be nice in the comments.
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