Search Results: will he ask me out friendship

I think the most awkward is inbetween. So like when someone says kinda cliche date-like questions but is also very uncomfortable with the situation. Rather than either being very much in their element in dating, or taking it slow.

For me I prefer to be friends first so even if I ask soneobe out or vice herds, I do best in the friendly realm initially. I think of dating as ‘friendship with potential’. So I would not date someone I wasn’t friends with but I also do not automatically switch gears if we are dating.

I understand this is not ideal for many snd rewuires a lot of patience for something that might go no where. I’m not in a rush for any kind of relationship so this gives me some flexibility , I suppose.

Brief Update on situation with the guy of the “ based in the recent 5 posts…” series 😂

****We met up today but I kept it very normal like how we used to be when we were friends. We mostly played basket ball. Talked a bit. But normally. It went well was more natural & he did not weirdly randomly try to kiss or hug me —which in this case is a good thing 😊😊

So I don't know basically we see each other on Wednesday’s. I don't know if it will turn into full fledge dating. I’m not exactly in the right space for that but as for how things are as of now, it’s good. So maybe down the line. We’ll see.

…and no need to worry bc of the posts 👍🏼 There were several posts bc the convo was 12,000 characters & posts are only 2,000–Not bc I was 5 posts worth of worried 😄I was setting a debate with a friend. I am not nor was I so much worried the guy is not honest it was more to see what other people thought bc my friend who is very observant normally, thought he was dishonest or will be trouble in future.

…. In my opinion initially he was acting unnatural and he probably is somewhere inbetween the first date where he presented as very traditionally and the second where he implied very loose character.

1 No. I just find “liking” anyone in any kind of a way other than friendship to be

Extremely stressful. I’m not good at it. it’s probably a terrible idea for us to do anything bc we did actually get along before. ALSO I’m not being coy. 🤨 I know often if someone says something negative it’s taken as coy and I’m being serious I honestly dk if this is a good idea. I’m also serious when I say I move SLOW and I don’t mean sex I just mean anything as far as getting to know each other….

☝🏼 …But that does bring me to my other concern before you interrupted me…

All I know about sex is I’m not ready for it and as far as WHEN I will be or if I will EVER be I have NO idea…

…So if that’s the ride you’re looking for you should exchange your ticket 🎫 and hop on another train 🚂—I mean that with all due respect.

I know sex is a big deal to most people and I don’t judge I just really dk if it’s gonna matter to me.

(So he def looked more surprised here -& maybe concerned not sure-than he did when I said “it takes me a long time to talk” & he kind of paused…then asked)

2 Sooo is that like you HATE it orrrr you just never found out? 👀

1 🤔 Fair question I suppose but it doesn’t really impact the fact I’m not in any rush. Anyhow the latter.

(He looked a bit more relaxed which honestly bothered me but on the other hand, I am the one who brought it up so I can’t fault him for reacting and we are not in a Disney cartoon so I can’t expect him to not care about sex)

(Getting over my discomfort bc it was all fair his reaction, but I guess I did not know what to say)

1 I do know I do not want to date someone who’s is having sex with other people 🤢

(He looked kind of feeling accused)

1. Oh lol no ! I don’t necessarily think that’s what you’re saying. I’m only raising it bc I USED to think it was a GOOD solution a perfect one. Like I can date whomever and never have to worry about sex! And now I don’t think it’s such a good idea.👀

CONTINUED*

I’m not really sure how to put this, but sone of you know I had ashes secersl questions about how you might react if someone you were seeing told you they plan to marry, you told them you do not, and they wanted to continue dating regardless. I found this odd and suspicious bc if you already know what you want and you know it’s not what the other person wants, well you either think they are not being serious or you are not being serious. That’s how I see it tho I know there’s varied opinions.

this situation confused me not just bc he said he def wants marriage but the whole way he spoke about his future plans he is not flaky and he seems kind of traditional so I don’t understand how he’s ok with a situation that doesn’t line up with his plans or values.

he wants to finish his phd and hopefully get married before his grandparents die (he’s not going to just marry anyone but he’s hoping the timing works out bc it will mean so much to them and they mean so much to him. I mean no doubt it’s super sweet it’s just…) he wants to go beck to Ukraine to get narrated have the celebration there & locate work in Europe bc he expects there will be few job opportunities in Ukraine itself and wants to be as close as possible to his family. We both have family from Ukraine but his is immediate family, mine is several generations down, so while I am Ukrainian so I’m not Ukrainian in the same way that he is.

now he’s telling me all this on basically the first time we were in a sort of date (went to the park before I went to work) we have been friendly for two years but I only asked him out a few weeks ago and bc of scheduling conflict it took us a while to get it together.

I did tell him I do not plan to marry for various reasons, he was quite in disbelief at that, also that I’m not sure what my ten year plan is. At the same time, he was very eager to see me again and as of now we will be going in a date next week. But I’m not sure it’s a good idea.