The "Friend Zone" and what "Just Friends" Means To A Man

[DaveJord]

Friend Zone-

A situation in which a friendship exists between two people, one of whom has an unreciprocated romantic or sexual interest in the other.
"I always wind up in the friend zone, watching them pursue other people"

I will tell you its a concern for me when I meet a women with a lot of guy friends. So yes, I proceed a with an abundance of caution and I recommend ladies you do the same with the fellas you meet like this.

What's "Just Friends" means to a man-

This "Friends" question comes up a lot honestly and some people get defensive about it, so I just want to say from the start, I am only speaking for myself. In saying that, I mean it's probably reflective of 90% of most average guys out there, if they are willing to admit it or not.

Me, as just myself, I don't maintain relationships with any women unless on some level there is some type of attraction. You can label those relationship whatever you like, "just friends", "possible girlfriends", or "Women I would date if the opportunity presented itself." Again for me, I definitely would never maintain any type of relationship with a women, unless there was some type of romantic interest on some level.

"Just Friends"-

For me, the women I would call, "Just Friends" are the women I maintain semi-acquaintance with, because I have some romantic interest in then. Either they are currently taken or otherwise unavailable at the moment. I maintain the acquaintance in order to remain relevant on some level to them without getting to close as to fall into the Friend Zone Trap. Once you fall into the Friend Zone Trap, that means she is only thinking of you as a friend and has made it very clear that is all you are to her. Once a women considers you as being "Just Friends" they tend to only see you as such and nothing more. Yes guys, they get the get the "Just Friends' thing in their head and see right past once they start looking for a romantic interest because you got too close without expressing your desire or sense of expectation. Once this happens any possibilities of a romantic relationship becomes a very long odds type of endeavors. As a man if you think there is some type of chance later you maintain the relationship on some level with your fingers crossed.

"Possible Girlfriends"-

The other type of acquaintance guys maintain are the "possible girlfriends". This is the girl where you seriously see her as some one you would consider dating and maybe even on a committed level. But for what ever reason your are not sure about her. She not in a place yet where you think she would or is ready to date. There might be some other factors involve were you are not sure she is would be ideal girlfriend material, but you still have some level of interest. So you maintain some type of relationship with her, but again you don't want to get to close, just remain relevant in some way so you can try to move it to a romantic situation if the opportunity presents itself.

"Women I would date if the opportunity presented itself."-

These are the types of women that you feel might be beyond your reach or other wise out of your reach. But if they wanted to date you or showed any interest you would jump on the opportunity immediately. So again you maintain the acquaintance on a more flirty level. You do this in order stay relevant, without getting too clos, there by avoiding the Friend Zone Trap.

So why does it mean when they claim to be or what to be "Just Friends?"

So guys with a lot of "Just Friends" that they clam are "Just Friends" in there lives are the type of guys with a lot hooks in the water. So as a women when you met this type of guy you have to ask yourself; why does he have so many women as friends and still available? What is it you don't know about him that possibly all these other women do and just want to be friends and not romantic with him? What makes him so likeable, but not dateable? Or is he a guy that is attracted to these women beyond his reach and is interested in you, until something better comes a long or one of his other prospective prospects pops up?

Let's be honest ladies there are a lot of guys out there that worm their way into these friendships, and once he starts dating someone else he suddenly becomes more attractive to you. Because you never saw him as someone you would date, until you see him with someone else, and you as his "friend" become less relevant in his life. He suddenly become the guy you never seriously consider, until you see him with another women and all of sudden you start thinking he was a lot more dateable then you thought.

I believe most guys fall into these "Just Friends" situations, because they honestly believe at some point, usually when you are at your most vulnerable, that you will see him as something more. They would much rather keep a girl they are attracted to at arms reach, rather then having no prospective chance later. Or they are just the type of guy that doesn't know how to advance a progress in a romantic relationship and they get to close on the friendship level and miss the opportunity. These types are the ones that will for ever wonder why it always happens to them. Sometimes, they eventually break the code with some one else then armed with knowledge and real romantic experience pop back into your lives later.

Don't get me wrong, these types are not necessarily bad people, or undateable. They just lack a degree of confidence or experience and unwittingly fall into the "Friend Zone." They do it to themselves either unknowing or subconsciously, and for women they seem to look past the romantic possibilities, or they like all the benefits of the friendship without the romance... its like dating someone for free. But be wary because at some point it will click in their heads, and they will become cold and distance, or more assertive, or suddenly more desirable to someone else that previously took them for granted.

[RangerBlue22]

Attraction isn’t a choice. But respect is. Just remember that.

9 out 10 tiene when a woman friendzones a guy the following criteria are present:

1. He’s a nice guy

2. He’s given her signals but he’s too respectful (and maybe paranoid so thanks a lot #metoo) so he never made a real move.

3. He does things she likes and benefit (attention, free meals, free counseling, favors). But there is little or nothing she can really offer him as a friend. Just talking to him and being present isn’t a “equal” friendship

4. She know’s she has emotional leverage on him. He’s not thinking completely clearly vs. she can see him plain as day because she’s not interested in him. This gives her leverage to take more advantage of him vs anyone else who isn’t interested in her.

5. She might have herself convinced she is being friends with him to “not hurt him”. But deep down she doesn’t respect him as a real man.

6. She plays games and never communicates directly how she feels about him. If she does it will be long after she made the decision to friéndzone him and his frustration has finally come to the head. But in the meantime she enjoys a lot of one way benefits from the time the her decision is made to when he finally calls her out / cuts her off

Now before a bunch of defensive girls get all pissed off at what I wrote above I have admit that guys sometimes do this to girls. I ashamed to admit I did this once in HS and again in college. But it was never my modus operandi and after age 25 I made sure to communicate early and respectfully if I wasn’t interested.

Anyway again: attraction isn’t a choice but RESPECT is.

[DaveJord]

💯 Well said! 👍 Friend Zone is definitely a one way street. Sure both think there getting something out of it. But friendships between opposite sexes usually means one person is getting maximum benefit from the friendship without having to be romantic. Leaving the other person believing its better to be friends then nothing. While the grasp to some level of emotional fulfillment, buts its still a glass half full scenario.

[RangerBlue22]

Being “friends” with someone who you attracted to when they don’t feel the same way (and you know it) is about like being a self mutilating “cutter”. You get adrenaline rushes from harming yourself.

I used to think this selfishness was limited to youthful immaturity. Then I met grown ass women in their 30s who still think this crap is okay.

Anyway my theory is that there was a time in history where women had to be selfish for survival purposes. They feel less regret/guilt about taking advantage of men than vice versa. Sure some guys use women for sex and that’s another evolutionary behavior. But at least consensual sex is supposed to be a mutually enjoyable activity. But the friéndzone is almost completely one sided. One person’s advantage to another person’s detriment.

Anyway again I know guys do this sometimes as well. But we don’t look to “set it up” the same women do. It usually happens by circumstance vs. women will go on dates with men who ask them out, decide to friéndzone them and then play dumb to milk them for all it’s worth. Guys for the most part don’t ever do that.

[Anonymous]

What if he led me on then rejected me and kept me as a friend then when I decided to leave him because he didn't treat me right and used to ignore me sometimes, he said to his friends that he loved me and I didn't love him back even though I never felt that he loved me... is he playing the victim?

[DaveJord]

So he lead you on, rejected you and then put you into the Friend Zone. So basically he did this because your his fall back chick. Or because he figured it was nicer then just flat out rejecting.

You say he didn't treat you right, and you didn't feel loved. So why would YOU want to be his friend?

Maybe you put yourself in the Friend Zone, because you are still hoping theirs still a chance. Women do this to guys all the time. They start out dating him, then someone else pops up that they think maybe better. So they come up with some excuse to stop dating, but want to be friends. For me, when this happens I know I would never seriously date the women every again. But if I am open to hooking up with her later I am fine with her thinking we are friends, but I don't really invest into the supposed friendship. Most times then not we never speak to each other again, unless she reaches out to me first.

I would assume this made you his "It" girl. Meaning you were there and available and he had some physical attraction, but some other opportunity became available.

[Opinion Owner]

Now I understand thanks so much 😊

[Pinay_ako]

I had many guy friends in grade school, high school, college all the way to today… yes I know, most of them, I sense some attraction towards me and some would even tell me but that is it! I only considered two to three guy friends who were relationship material. One became my 2nd ex. So there is a way to get out of the dreaded friend zone. But you gotta stand out! You gotta show her you’re more than just one of her go to guy friends, a shoulder to lean on and cry on about the boy who broke her heart! My 2nd ex used to talk smack about my crush and I was wondering what’s wrong with you? What’s up your ass? 🤣 Then like a romantic chick flick true story, on prom night, he asked me to dance and we danced all night left our partners bored to death at our tables and we literally didn’t give a single damn about the world. I realized he was just more than a friend. Two weeks later, he was my boyfriend 😂. It was fun while it lasted till he cheated on me 2 years later. Yea but guys have a way out of that zone.

[DaveJord]

I agree there is way out, but its a tough row to plow.

[Pinay_ako]

True. Not everyone gets out of it. But can change overtime. Some guys get more handsome when they age and this happened to me in college. We were seat mates in high school and we were good friends. Until they moved to another city. A few years later I saw him again in college. Omg, he changed! I was crushing hard but I had a boyfriend so nah.

[DaveJord]

Right which goes back to what I was saying about guys that maintain the relationship with hope of potential future opportunity, but to me that is not a genuine friendship. Maybe in the mind of the women but no the guy.

[OlderAndWiser]

Early on:

Him: "I'm ready for us to get sexual."

Her: "I want us to get to know each ther better. I want my lover to be my best frend, too."

Later:

Him: "I'm ready for us to get sexual."

Her: "But I don't want to take a chance on ruining our friendship." (And, invariably, her profile says she wants a man who knows how to be honest and sincere!)

[nickaboy]

This is kinda the situation im in i asked her to stop talking to me for a while now

[DaveJord]

Right they all want honestly and sincerity, until they get it and don't like it.

[Jamie05rhs]

@OlderAndWiser Nailed it!! 😅

(In my case, substitute "date" for "get sexual." Since I don't have sex before marriage.
But the same concept applies!)

[coachTanthony]

Men shouldn't be friends with women they are attracted too. It wastes valuable time when you could be on the hunt for someone who does like you in a romantic way. Many men are just friends with women in hopes of getting a shot of dating them or sleeping with them. That's not really a friend now is it.

[JDavid25]

Absolutely!! 💯..

[Ryfyle]

Finally A Response I can't shit on you for.

[Jamie05rhs]

I used to not believe in having female friends. But then some older women advised me that it would be good to make friends with girls because that would help me learn how to talk to them and not be so scared. So I did.

However, I have never seen it as a means to an end. There are also a lot of people who have advised to make friends with girls first before dating them ("friends first"), but I don't necessarily ascribe to that philosophy. I think it's much cleaner and simpler to have my friends be friends ("just friends") and keep my potential love interests in a separate category entirely. That is why, for me, I can honestly say, "just friends" really means "just friends."

(Also, I generally don't make friends with girls who I am attracted to. ... UNLESS they are already taken. Because there is absolutely no issue there, since I am psychologically unattracted to taken women.)

If there is someone who I AM attracted to, I will generally do one of two things:
1. Not talk to her at all.
or
2. Make it clear that I am interested in her by having an intentional conversation with her and trying to get to know her better.

Now, HERE is where things stall out --in Option 2. (Option 1 I never have to worry about. Either I work up the courage to talk to them eventually or I don't. Either way I'm not missing anything because I'm not being rejected. If they marry someone else, so be it. ... But chances are they weren't my type anyway.)
In Option 2, I'll be talking to a girl, and she may stall out the conversation. Or slow things down. If this happens, I can only do one of two things:
A. Remain patient and continue devoting 100% of my time to her,
or
B. Find another girl to talk to.

While Option B is basically admitting defeat, and that does sound rather morbid if you think about it, I don't really get hung up on it. You have to treat these matters in strictly business terms. No, I haven't rejected the first girl, and I don't have anything against her; she's just lost her Priority Placement Privileges.
So anyway, I continue to meet other women and make acquaintance with them. Eventually, I may be chatting with 5 girls at the same time. Does this make me a player? No. Because none of them have made any commitment to me. None of them have even shown me interest. So I don't owe them anything, either. (This does sound like a cold and heartless way of going about things, but this is another concept that I learned from older women who were advising me, because they were afraid that I was being taken advantage of.)

So, no, I do not get trapped in the Friend Zone anymore. Because, while I may enter it frequently, I am not afraid to step outside the lines and walk off the field and walk away.

[DaveJord]

I agree I am "friends" has a lot of meanings, work friends, Facebook friends, people I knew from highschool that were friends but haven't' talked to in decades. Some people throw the word friends around loosely... like saying I love peanut butter, and that I love my mom. There is no comparison there on the scale of love.

So yes I have female friends.. but I would never consider a girl I am attracted to as "Just a Friend"

And yes friendship and dating go hand in hand, as long as she understands its a friendship with meaning beyond being "Just Friends". I make that very clear when I befriend a women I am attracted to and if she is not interested in my friendship, then we will never be "Just Friends'.

[Jamie05rhs]

@DaveJord Well, what I'm saying is I don't mix friendship and dating at all. If I want to date a girl, I always start it off as a relationship with romantic intent. If she puts up walls, she doesn't just magically then become a friend. She is actually less than a friend. Because she doesn't trust me and I don't trust her. You know what I mean? Even though we still may be on cordial speaking terms.

[DaveJord]

I totally understand

[Msputiton]

With my experiences because i play and have played sports for most my life.

I have a high amount of male friends, and i can tell most of them have never showed any interest in me in relationship way.

I think the common share of sports (basketball) there is this she's one of us mentality.

Most my friends male and female are people i met from basketball that we grew a bond with, and i honestly see no difference in the way the male or female friends treat me.

On occasion i get that friend who tries it, but they very rare.

I think it's the sports bond we have.

But i ain't disagreeing with you that the things you are saying ain't true because can say anytime i begin talkin to nonathletes they seem to struggle to separate friendship and dating.

But i don't know tbh, it is a little weird and desperate for someone to stay friends with someone that has no interest in dating them, in hopes that they can change their mind.

That is an even more of a reason to not date them

[DaveJord]

" it is a little weird and desperate for someone to stay friends with someone that has no interest in dating them, in hopes that they can change their mind."

See its totally not weird as long as you're "Just Friends." Thats why they are so instant on being just friends, but maybe its true for the girl... but I am suspect of the guy.

[Msputiton]

I do think based off your statement, i would understand why you would feel that way.
You wouldn't be involved with anyone female unless you thought you had a chance or interest in dating.
So your mind is automatically gonna say, him, probably same with him.

I do think guys are not anymore likely to do this than a woman.
I know guys who have done this and i have girl friends who have done this to guys/girls they like.
I just rather date someone who likes me, not someone I have to figure out how to manipulate into liking me

[exitseven]

@msputiton Do you think a lot of guys are intimidated by you because you are probably a better athlete than them?

[Msputiton]

@exitseven depends.
Most the athletes never seem worried about it.
But usually nonathletes always think this is the best way to flirt
Oh we gotta play 1 on 1. I know i will beat you.

They can't honestly think they can beat me, that's just ego talking

[exitseven]

@msputiton Would you give a guy you know you can beat in sports a chance? Just asking for a friend.

[Msputiton]

@exitseven yes. In fact 2 out of the 3 guys i been with played it recreationally but never to the college level.

[exitseven]

@msputiton How about somebody who was not athletic at all. ?

[exitseven]

@msputiton If I am getting too personal let me know.

[Msputiton]

@exitseven well tbh. I don't date anymore.
I mean how bad we talkin? like they run like a baby giraffe?

I do prefer someone who plays basketball and can be somewhat competitive, but it's not a deal breaker, but they differently gonna have to make up for it in other areas of the relationship.
Because even after graduating i have business plans that center around basketball.

[exitseven]

@msputiton Thank you for the answer.

[river23]

I mean as a girl this is true and I'm not gonna lie I've had a few times where I fell into the "just friends" trap as well and it sucked cuz I truly liked him. And with the opinion about getting close to a girl when she doesn't know you to well or how a girl will wanna be friends and lovers but then not wanna ruin the friendship later cuz your also lovers. Well I'd have to disagree I'd wanna try and be friends with my boyfriend if I had one as well but if he wasn't ok with it guess that's that and if us being friends means we can't be intimate I disagree a lot I do believe if I were in that situation as long as the guy I'm dating doesn't think it'll ruin our friendship I'm fine with it because I know myself well enough to know it wouldn't ruin our friendship on my part at least. And nah I'd rather get to know a guy I mean shit I'm shy as fuck so it's hard for me to date anyone and I've been through a lot of bad situations with men but I still want one for myself I mean I've never really dated anyone so fuck I'm to inexperienced to know Jack shit about dating so hey again just my opinion here but I'd love a guy as long as he loved me because I know there will be disagreements or hurdles in the road along the way but I'm prepared to fight and make it through together and if the guy I'm with isn't ready well fuck guess I was stupid or he just wasn't ready and yeah I'm willing to wait and in my experience that's not usually something I've ever heard from any girl but I'll wait I'll wait as long as I can but just as time can heal a broken heart it can also break a waiting heart ya know. I'm not gonna judge others I'm not gonna be a problem I just want to find someone who loves me and won't hurt me and will stay with me and I'll be fine and yeah that's more or less just like a fairytale but I hope and believe it will come true one day maybe not for me but that's just to bad then I guess, also I feel like I interrupted a guys discussion sorry.

[ManOnFire]

Guys who are always ending up in the friendzone simply are not assertive enough, yes. They want to be her man but don't know how to progress to romance like you said. I was once that way myself in my younger years, but with enough experience over time I gave up being that friendly guy and got way more assertive, and it became natural to me. Most women - real women anyway - appreciate a man who is not afraid to ask her out or be somewhat direct.

Now the really awful women who friendzone you are the ones who have casual sex with men you know nothing about, although you can tell by the way she behaves. If you're friendly with her, she will perceive you as being "pure" or decent material, and she'll play the game of pretending to be a wholesome girl only with you in case she later on wants to swing your way for a real relationship, but all the while she's getting downright raunchy with other dudes she would never marry. She's cool to keep you as a friend because she thinks you're not the type to be assertive in bed because you're friendly and respect her, but she keeps you around in case she ever feels ready to have a real relationship and thinks you'd be a good option for that.

[Twalli]

I make friend far more organically. Gender isn't a concern or issue. If we like the same things, then we hang out and become friends that way. Doesn't matter if I find the girl attractive or not. Having said that I have only ever found two friends attractive. I only find one friend attractive now, because the other one is my girlfriend (so while I find her attractive, I don't see her as a friend anymore, she's a lot more). Because of this organic friendship, I find that I am generally not "friendzoned" we're not friends because one of us likes the other person. We like the same things so we keep ending up at the same places. Because we keep ending up at the same places we develop a relationship that is strong and we know that romance did not affect us becoming friends.

[DaveJord]

Fair enough, so basically your not going out of your way to be friends if you stopped participating in the same hobbies you would never see her again, possibility? For example I have work friends, but they are more like acquaintances that once I stopped working there I would not stay in contact with.

Like I have Facebook Fiends but we never really talk out of of Facebook... so sure we are friends if that what they want to call it... but not really.

[Twalli]

Yeah, if we change our interests, then we'd stop being friends. I don't have trouble making conversation as I have a very general knowledge about a lot of things, even if they don't interest me. Because of that I can pretty much have a conversation with anyone, and based on what they'rer passionate about I can guage whether or not we can be friends. I will say that one of my strenghts is in making a conversation interesting to another person. People enjoy talking about things that interest them and it helps if the listener isn't confused becasue they have no knowledge of the topic.

[SomeGuyCalledTom]

A man can have a friend who happens to be female and not be "friend zoned".

A man can also have a romantic crush on a woman but lands in the "friend zone" through inaction or lack of reciprocated feelings.

And sometimes a man can start off having romantic feelings for a woman, but in time realises she's actually better kept as a close friend. Or vice versa.

It's all situational, and if you're not sure if that guy 'friend' likes you romantically or just platonically, then you should probably just ask instead of make assumptions. Because assumptions make an "ass" out of "U" and "I".

[U4ea0]

Using a mans sexual proclivity for a woman and turning him into a provider for said woman without said woman giving said man any sexual access is exploitative of the mans nature and completely immoral on the behalf of the woman yet this happens all the time and society is perfectly happy to ignore, reinforce and even encourage said behaviour.

[DaveJord]

Totally and I would not accuse all women of this, but there are definitely women other looking to exploit men like this. Most are genie about their desire for friendship, but they are naïve to the their subconscious in regards to the true nature of the situation.

[CallmeTheKnight]

You can't be friends with someone unless you wanted to be one in the first place. You agree to be or passively become friends then establish the friendship overtime.

If you can't take rejection then you'll go to this imaginary place called "The Friend Zone". Trust me, if a woman likes you then you wouldn't have to worry about such a thing... she'll make it obvious when she sees that you're interested in her.

[DaveJord]

Right, I don't have friendzone issues.

[Anonymous]

Because you are available and open to them they don't want you, you waste time and energy on them that you could be using with another woman. You are both a resource both financially and emotionally and there as a back up guy in case things don't work out with Chad. When dating a girl you also have to be wary of "guy friends" who use friendship as a way into your girls pants waiting for a vulnerable moment when you guys have problems or even manipulating her.

[DaveJord]

Agreed!!! Its one thing to be FreindZoned, but you if you fall into the FreindZone Trap then you are right, you're making all those mistakes.

[Opinion Owner]

I learned you got to pull away from that bs

[Smoothing]

Looking at how the friend zone has been described hear. I can categorically say, I have never been in the friend zone.

Maybe I live in a different world but I find most things said here weird. I have never been friends with a woman with the hopes of being something more. I don't even understand how a guy can be lining in the que like that. Ad much as it may be true, it sounds made up and I am persuaded to conclude that guys like that, have no pride in themselves and are most likely not interested in relationships but rather creating opportunities for having sex.

[Smoothing]

Though I understand the friend zone from the context of immaturity and lack of experience.

[Smoothing]

Proceeding with caution. I absolutely agree with you there. I also have another rule. If she starts playing games, I am out. I don't don't like the mind games. I can always tell when the games start. Lol. I am unplayable perhaps. Caution is the name of the game for me.

[Smoothing]

Sorry caution is the principle for me.

[TheSpaceGnome]

I don't like that sort of mentality because I would need to be just friends with her for years AND have her show interest in me to even consider her as a viable partner option.

The "friend zone" is my safety net away from her trying to get in my pants before I know her.

I've never been friend zoned, but it would be a lot better than dealing with women who try rush into a relationship, and then think I'm not interested at all just because a few months just isn't long enough for me to know if I like her or not.

The friend zone buys me enough time to decide, without it she'd just give up on me as a possibility because most people are impatient af.

[DaveJord]

Interesting how many women do have trying to get into your pants? That's a problem fir you?

[TheSpaceGnome]

It's not that its swarms of women at once, my friend groups are small by choice at any given time, but they don't last that long because most people get bored of the stuff I enjoy, or turn out to be jerks.

So the number of women who hit on me to no end is high, but it's sort of "single file RNG" sectioned out over decently long periods when a friend group goes sour and I find a new one, because I'm pretty much a shut-in and I have a low bs tolerance.

Anyway, whenever I make a new friends in general, and one in the group is a female that is single (sometimes even not single) 9 out of 10 of them flirt with me in a "demanding" sort of way, acting in a way that if a guy did that, women would call him a creep.

And they just don't stop even if I tell them to, and every single time I decide to flirt back, It's made very clear that thats all the permission they think they need to get immediate sex (and a good chunk of them don't even think they need my permission at all).

If I had not met most of these people online, I'd probably had lost my virginity in my sleep by now, I seem to always attract THAT type of girl, the "it's ok, just accept it" kind, and to be fair, I think it's cute, but I can't figure out if I like someone that quickly, so I don't want that sort of extreme on day one.

So just 1 every so often. but it's every damn time pretty much. These women take things too fast, they just want a cute guy to hump, they don't care about shared hobbies, interests, goals, cost of childcare, birth control effectiveness, vetting a guy to see if he is lying, etc. so I pass their test in a few weeks (even if I reject them), whereas I need 3 years of filtering out any lies they might have said for them to pass mine.

My biggest issue isn't "too many women" it's that whenever a woman does like me, she has her mind made up long before I do. So I see "just being friends" as a sign I have actual time to think about it.

[JDavid25]

Yeah, the mistake a lot of guys make is settling for friendship with girls they clearly want more with in hopes that they might notice them.. Very rarely does that work because believe it or not even in this day and age women like strong hints of masculinity, or mystery.. If you agree to friendship, that's more of a feminine trait, most women are not sexually attracted to femininity, it doesn't get their loins tingling.. Women want a good man, but that's after they have established a strong attraction for you..

[exitseven]

I don't beieve in the friend zone. All relationships have to potential to be romantic. They do not always happen because one or both of the participants just do not feel any chemistry towards the other. sometimes this may change but most of the time it does not.

[MikeInHawaii]

The friend zone was much more annoying when I was younger.

“I can’t go out with you. You’re my best friend. I can talk to you about anything.”

”You wouldn’t want those qualities in a boyfriend?”

Now, some of my female friends are in their teens and twenties. I may have watched them grow up. I wouldn’t expect them to want a 58-year-old boyfriend. I have no family within 2,300 miles and they’re like nieces I’ve adopted.

[VforVindication]

I wouldn't date a woman that rejected good nice guys back in her youth to be with bad boys. She can fuck off. No sympathy for those women even if they grew out of it and learned from their mistakes. There was a girl where i worked that fell in love with me. I told her we could be friends and take it slow because i was planning on staying with her in an apartment. But then i realised that it cannot work like that. Because if we are just friends then we can date other people. And i told her i wouldn't want to see her dating other people. So a woman that puts you in the friend zone will never love you.

[Infinity12]

I do not feel I am being disrespectful to my male friends, nor do they.

[DaveJord]

At 59 I think guys your age know the score.

[grega239]

I dont enter friendships with women because it eventually becomes "i need help/favor" type of thing.

Not a fan of being looked at as utility

[DaveJord]

So true when your "Just Friends" they get all the benefits id having a relationship with a man, without the romanance.