Search Results: could he ever want me

As many of you know, for the past year, I've been drinking like a fish, a whole bottle of rum every day for much of the year and sometimes more. I did this because I felt depressed and stuck, unable to move, and wanted an escape. Many of you tried to help me, to which I didn't listen. However, I hit rock bottom when my liver function test was done on May 19, 2025. My ALT levels were 373, and AST was 319. Both of these are more than 6 times the acceptable levels of 50 or less. Indicating very severe liver damage. This explained why I managed to drink so much, yet not feel drunk, my liver was doing a death rattle, and I would be, soon, if I didn't stop. For the first time in a while, i felt scared to lose my life, I looked back and saw what a coward I'd been. I felt a deep sense of regret, all the people I pushed away, all the problems I avoided, and now it might be too late. I bought a bottle of rum, 1 liter. I poured out 700ml of it and drank the rest. That was 80 days ago, and I haven't had one single drop since. My doctors had given up, not even bothering to schedule an appointment as they knew my cowardly behavior would simply cancel, so I didn't have to face them. After 38 days of absolute sobriety, I messaged my doctor informing her that i took her advice to heart and have removed alcohol from my life, I wanted to come in and get bloodwork done. On July 14th, it came back. ALT levels are 64, AST is 42. My liver healed faster than I ever thought possible, crushing my foolish excuse from before that I was too far gone to heal. With this, I was able to go back on Trikafta, improving my lung function greatly. I got another liver function test done on August 13th, ALT levels are 49, AST is 25. My liver is now healthier than it was a year before I started drinking. I wasn't sure I believed in God, but I prayed for my life to be spared, and I do believe he listened. I'm not sure how I want to celebrate, but you can bet it will involve a lot of family and no alcohol

I saw an article discussing the Great washout of the tech job market. Once an industry that presidents, billionaires, and other prominent people boasted as the pathway to success is no longer.

It speaks volumes when tech majors are struggling more than art history majors. I have come to wonder, has the software engineer the new aspiring "artist" or musician? You know those career paths that are highly unrealistic where people laugh when you tell them? Like "yeah, I want to be the next studio artist for Disney" or some shit like that.

Meanwhile, the middle class is being pulverized and destroyed. Once the beacon of prosperity of the "American Dream" is becoming less and less likely to obtain, especially for younger generations.

I grew up in a typical upper-middle-class family. The two-story family home in a mostly-white subdivision neighborhood with the community pool, attending top-notch schools, and riding in the family SUV. The baseball team, boy scouts, and my regular doctors visits became a common routine as a child. We were able to eat out at modest places after church. The pantry full of food. You know what I mean.

It seems this lifestyle will never be obtainable in my lifetime. My grandparents were wealthy, my parents were strong upper class, my generation is struggling to even afford an apartment or trailer. It is like kicking a can down a road, getting more and more beat up.