Search Results: my ex changed

I met a guy online YEARS ago, and when we 1st met, we were very much in love with each other, considering we were kids. We were dating for a few months online (lived 3 hours away, but he didn't have a car to visit, and I felt uncomfortable with the drive), so we never saw each other physically besides video calls/pics. I met a guy at my undergrad school and dropped him to pursue that relationship. But we have contacted each other at least once a year since the initial split to catch up. Each time I would hear from him, he would be with another girl while I was in the same relationship. He joined the military, and I was very excited to hear from him after he was finished because I still had feelings for him.

After he left boot camp, he informed me that he was stationed across the world without a choice and that we would figure out how to communicate best since there were time differences. Around this time, my dad passed, so I was in a bad mental state, but we were planning on seeing each other since he was going to move to a different location shortly while I was going to the same city for a school conference. He disclosed that he cheated on me with another girl by getting her pregnant (miscarriage), and he couldn't see me as promised due to military circumstances. I was devasted and told him never to contact me again. I spied on him via social media to see what he was up to, and he got engaged to another girl.

Recently, he kept popping up on my social media, and I decided to message him at the beginning of this month to check-in. He was thrilled I reached out. He told me that his engagement had been canceled, disclosed that he loved me, and said he'd pay for my flight to see him physically. I got weird vibes about it all since he didn't fully close the ex-fiance chapter and even had sex with her while we were discussing our future. I cut it off yesterday because he did not show that he changed. Do you think I did the right thing?

I’ve never been attracted to someone like my ex. By this i mean inside and out! I miss making out with my white ex 😔. I miss his smell. I miss it when he carry me. I miss looking into his blue eyes 💔. I miss our conversations. I miss feeling peaceful and safe on his lap. I miss everything about him. I wish if i could take him back one day! i now only want a white man like my ex so I could forget about him. I think if i was so attracted to him then i will be also attracted to my future white boyfriend like him and then forget easily about him. Because i think the worst thing is if i marry a brown guy and then I remember my white ex, nothing i could change then 😥. Should i be picky and just date anotger white man? Or am i stupid to think in this way?