Search Results: want more than dating

I feel like my ex was emotionally abusive. I used to really be into her more than she was into me. She used tell me “I didn’t want this relationship, you did”. And when people would ask how we met she’d say “I didn’t wanna date him”. I explained to her how it hurts me when she says these things m. And she’d say “you’re just insecure”.

What’s even worse, she told me about how before we started dating. She went on dates with guys who she really liked and they rejected her. So am I the nice guy who finished last?

I used to be highly attracted to her. She never wanted sex with me, at the same time, complaining that her ex boyfriend didn’t want sex with her. She barely wanted to be affectionate with me.

Even worse, she used deliberately turn me on so she could sexually reject me. Would tell me “come over I’ll lick your balls and your butt” and refuse sex when I show up. Every single time we’d have an argument, even if it’s minor she’d say “you’re getting none”. So I started keeping silent to avoid conflict.

She used to complain that I’m not making her happy and give me reasons why. Which I’ll admit I’m not perfect, I know I have my flaws and bad habits, but. When I’d tell her what she’s doing to make me unhappy she’d reply “you knew I was a bitch when you met me”.

About 3 weeks ago we went to a Thanksgiving dinner at her friends house and I felt like she was kinda flirty with a guy. She seemed very touchy with him. I even saw her put her arm around him. I mentioned it to her a few days later. About how I was uncomfortable with how she behaved with him, and again. Told me “im insecure” and broke up with me. Denied ever putting her arm around him when I saw her do it.

It’s been a couple weeks and I’m still emotionally hurting over her. Haven’t been able to eat or sleep. Having nightmares and visions of her in bed with other men. I’ve dated and had sex with other women since. But I still can’t get her out of my head. What should I do?

For context I am 22 and recently graduated college.

During my senior year of highschool there was a girl who was two years younger than me. Its a long story and hard to explain but essentially we both had a crush on each other for like 2 years at this point but had never dated. At this point, knowing I was about to graduate, I was scared of dating her. At the same time, I was a little sad that I wasted the last couple years and never dated her while I could.

there's more to the story but I'll keep it brief: we were really, really into eachother (based on my own experience and what her friends have told me) but we never dated, and when we tried in the summer before I went to college we got into an emotion-fuled fight and really hurt eachother. I think we both just knew that with me in college and her still in highschool it was not going to work. And being young and dumb we said stupid things to each other.

During my freshman year I asked one of her friends if she was still mad at me and she said no, in fact, she wanted me to text her. We apologized to each other and I told her I wanted to at least be friends and she said she felt the same. But we drifted apart and I haven't really spoken to her since then.

I am probably overthinking this but I wonder if she's still into me. She is the most attractive girl I've ever met even after all this time. She always views my stories on instagram and snap, but we never talk. We both dated a few people over the years but nothing has lasted.

Do you think there's a chance she still might me interested in me? Or am I crazy and wishfulling thinking. I just hate that we never really had a chance to actually try at dating.

I want to know if I need to finally let go and move on if there could be a chance for us.