Search Results: hang out with a guy you dated

Black male's experience in college

" Back in college I’ve seen the sexiest Asians just throw themselves heavily at white guys. It was a surreal experience to say the least. I thought I had some sort of favoritism being an exotic, good looking black guy.

I never dated at all in high school, so had no idea what to expect in freshmen year, but I remember the first girls I ever talked to were Asian & they wanted nothing to do with me. I had a white girl that I befriended and at my first big social circle, she was my wing women & everything she told me to say seemed really good. I had no idea how to interact with women myself but the Asian girls still seemed just… indifferent, like they had no reaction to me & it wasn’t fun. Everyone else I encountered freshmen year was extremely social & fun to talk to.

It was probably because they knew I was talking to them with romantic intent & didn’t want to lead me on or had no interest. Then I asked a close white friend and he told me that Asian girls don’t like black guys, they are obsessed with whites, don’t take it personally. Some time later next semester, I got semi close to an Asian girl whose a friend of my best friend.

When we all hung out, she talks about the little things her boyfriend does that she doesn’t like but she gets very gushing about him anyway. Fast forward to sophomore second semester we were all hanging out in the student game room… she reads her phone text & begins crying & runs to the bathroom. My friend and I share a concerned face. Never knew what happened but I thought that this boyfriend must be a real catch. Until I saw his pictures and he was a very chubby, very average or a bit below average white guy. This girl was a 5ft Asian girl with perfect features everywhere, and had a very bubbly, love-able personality. Fast forward 2 years later, they break up. It’s revealed the dude she gave so much love to saw her as a fetish to release all his desires upon."

You have this guy friend you've known for ten years. He likes you- he's asked you on dates before but you've always said "no" because you don't want a relationship. But you're close. He comforts you when you struggle- most recently with the loss of a family member, flying to a different state to care for your nephews. You talk and hang out often, sometimes at each others' places. He is always there for you and stops whatever he's doing to help you. He recently bought a house and took a management position at a major company. Your mom likes him. You feel safe around him and trust him with your life.

He recently started dating a girl. He's even introduced you to her. You immediately become jealous and insecure. You call and text your "friend" more often, telling him you "think of him". You buy him things that you know he likes. You drop subtle criticisms about his girlfriend. You invite him over for dinner one evening. He feels something is "off" but you say everything is "fine". Your conversations seem normal and casual. He continues talking about his girlfriend and being excited to meet her family. You're confused. You don't know if you really love him or not.

You can't take it anymore and decide to ghost him. Cold turkey. No contact. Your friend is obviously confused and worried. After a month of ignoring him, he comes to your apartment door. He knocks but you don't answer. It's pouring rain outside. He has keys to your place but he doesn't come inside. He sits down with his back against the door and begins talking as if you're there. He says he loves you; that he always has. He observes you're hurting and he says he's a bad friend for hurting you, but he doesn't know why. He says he will walk out of your life if means you'll be happier, but he at least wanted to say goodbye. He stops talking. You...