Search Results: good conversation

Not too long ago I went on date for the hell of it with a young woman I had very little physical attraction for. But I treated her well, bought her drinks, engaged in a good conversation and even drove her back to her place.

After some discussion she made a very insulting comment about my haircut a few moments after I dropped her off. Taken aback and pissed off I just said “well fuck you & have a good night” and left. I did nothing to provoke her. I didn’t hit on her.

The next day I sent her a DM saying “that haircut comment was mean”. She responded “you know what you are completely right. You did absolutely nothing to deserve it. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me”. She then proceeded to literally beg to me (not exaggerating) to go on a second date. She kept going off on how cute I was & everything else.

I told her I felt better that she apologized but I declined. I wished her the best.

I later asked myself (and should have asked her) would she have apologized if she did not find me attractive? I highly doubt it. Her apology wasn’t truly genuine because there was still something in it for her.

The world isn’t fair. It’s obviously easier to mistreat people who are of little or no value to you. It’s like seeing a homeless person. There is virtually nothing they can do for you (and they can be annoying or even dangerous). But would you do something nice for them and do it discreetly (not for optics)?

It is just in my experience especially with dating is that women have a harder time respecting men they don’t find value in.

To a limited extent I can understand they don’t want to give the guy the wrong idea. But once a woman determines a man is of little use to her she feels like it’s okay to disrespect him much more then vice versa

I have been in the reverse position a few times. I won’t bend over backwards for those women. But I won’t ghost or disrespect them either. I will politely turn them down.

This cute girl started recently and she is quite nice. I didn’t think too much initially when she was presented (maybe that she is cute but that’s all). But the past couple of months I found that she has a really cool personality. Really nice, smart, sense of humour. She remembered some details for me even tho we are in different departments. We joke around. We had a very nice conversation about her hometown while travelling from work once and it seemed that she enjoyed our brief time then. However I never really though anything for my colleagues ever. For me they are just colleagues. I am kinda one of the cool colleagues with whom you can always talk to and get help and people usually expect me to do something in a convo. But here I am wondering after I kinda got nervous talking to her the other day.. heart pumping, weird. There is this one colleague who gives her a lot of attention and sits next to her. They joke around and stuff. Even gave her “jokingly” a “my-work-wife” bracelet. Yesterday I got a notification for her profile in Facebook. Was wondering if should just add her (I rarely add coworkers). I can talk shit in front of people for hours, but when it comes to the romantic side of things, I am kinda weak. So maybe just sit on my ass and pass? I have enough work and sh*t to ignore her but I find myself thinking…maybe she is just a good person and I shouldn’t mix things (today she even gave me free lasagna that she made for some cook-off they were doing at her department…talk about the way to a man’s hearth is his stomach.) So continue talking to her, add her on Fb and plan to ask her out?

So I would really appreciate some insight from the girls out there about whether or not this girl at work likes me. I certainly don't want to make it awkward between us. We pass each other at work and our conversations have always been light hearted and work related. I take the opportunity when I can to show my appreciation for the work that she does as she is in HR and that as we all know can be a really difficult job. Well after a big presentation she did i made the point of congratulating her on what an awesome job she did and she seemed appreciative. I asked her if she would love to get coffee the next time we are in the office together (which would be a week later) and she said "Wonderful! Yes I should be in". That day came and i felt nervous so i just left it and neither of us spoke about grabbing a coffee together. Well fast forward to last week - it was a rough week as there was a huge round of layoffs across the company and i am sure she was heavily involved in all of that and i can only imagine how awful it was for her and others in HR.

I let the dust settle and then reached out to her yesterday and said "Hi [insert her name here] - no idea what sort of week you had last week but my heart went out to you and others in HR. I hope you are okay." To which she responded a short time later to say "thank you [insert my name here]! I'm on vacation now recovering!" To which the conversation went thusly:

Me: "Good for you! Did you go anywhere warm and sunny for vacation?"

Her: "Opposite! I'm skiing in Japan!"

Me: "WOW!!! FUN!!! I'm jealous - I hope you have a truly awesome time!!!
I would love to catch up with you for lunch/dinner when you are back so I can hear all about your trip!"

Her: "Thank you! I appreciate you reaching out
Yes of course! Sounds like a plan"

So she is back from vacation next week and i am sat here wondering what to make of this.

Is she interested in me the way i am interested in her? Am I overthinking this? What should I do?