Search Results: ex girlfriend want me to date

Hey everyone, I’m looking for your input and advice. ****not complaining, I just need help understanding bc I’m a dumb cis straight white male****

Am I leading these women on somehow?

I went through a breakup in September, with 0 bad terms between us, she was way out of my league both physically and as a human. I was and still am deeply in love with her, and I never shut the fuck up about her to people while I was with her (almost 2 years). We’re still super close.

about me (just trust that my self assessment is true for this exercise): I’m a lot of fun, around 30 years old, attractive but not active, so I have a dad bod but I’m really fucking funny and charismatic. I have a lot of beautiful platonic and meaningful female friendships that are strictly friendships. I’m a sweet heart and people are generally protective of me, because I’m depressed and having a hard time and they all love me more than I do. Aka, women see that and feel safe around me.

at the same time, I have a dad bod, my life is a mess right now, I’m openly still in love with my girlfriend, I communicate that “I’m not ready to date anyone right now.” I’m about to start attending both NA and AA meetings. I feel like somehow, me being at the lowest point in my life, is somehow attracting all these beautiful women who are initiating conversations with me and asking me to hang out.

I haven’t slept with anyone since my ex because I’m not ready for that, it would make me too sad. But, I’m a total flirt.
Anyway, one of my gal pals said that my behavior is confusing, because I’m vulnerable and texting with them, and still flirty. But I’m just thinking like, “surely my life is so shitty right now that no woman wants any part of the mess that I am right now.”

so why do you think I’m getting this new attention?

So there are a few people in my life, thankfully not many, who I have these multiple-years long conflicts with. We're talking like active hostility, they'll block me if I tried reaching out, that sort of thing. I've learned to just respect the fact they don't want to be in touch lol.

Now, me personally, I know what the conflicts are about, but I just don't see them as that big of a deal. Like the one conflict happened because the guy thought I was abusive to my ex girlfriend (I wasn't). Another happened with a girl I dated, who it turned out that she had a fiance and was dating me on the side. There's a conflict I had with two other ladies who had dated my friends, and who blocked me after the relationships ended. I'm sure there are others.

None of these people have any interest in interacting with me whatsoever and seem to be actively repelled by the idea, even years later. I guess I just don't see the big deal? Like I get that we aren't going to be friends, but we can't even engage in small talk and pleasantries? Some of these conflicts happened more than 5 years ago.

I realize that I'm probably more comfortable with confrontation than most people, but I feel like this isn't normal. Like, if you briefly dated my friend 5-7 years ago, we should probably be able to at least talk. I think the one where she cheated on her fiance with me makes a bit more sense that she wouldn't want to be in contact, but even that I just feel like replying to a message online isn't that big of a deal.

Am I missing something here?