Society Putting Pressure On Young Women

[Anonymous]

I hear about it, I see it in magazines, on tv and the net. You read a teen mag and have a look in the Q&A section and think wow these girls are too young to be thinking about sex, love, body image etc. Beeing a GAG member just confirms to me the growing numbers of girls worring about things that really shouldn't be crossing their minds at all!

I'm all for sex and health education but it makes me mad knowing that our society has created such anxiety in terms of barely even teenage girls thinking they aren't skinny enough, won't be liked by boys, won't fit in because they haven't had sex, feel the pressure to have sex by a guy etc.

I was a young teenager when I started thinking about these kinds of things but not that young. Now looking back to those years I wish I would have just focused on school, my friends and family- just enjoying those years and being my own person instead of worrying about guys, sex, body image, partying etc. I wasted those prescious years away and now I sit here watching girls even younger than I was going through the same- and not just girls for that matter even young guys.

Next time you post a "how do I look?" Or a question about whether your sex life is great or not sot back and think of the demographic that is reading, internalizing what you are saying. Are you setting an example for young people or are you adding to the angst of the next generation of GAGers?

[SomeGuy37]

I'm not AT ALL BLAMING WOMEN, but I know I am going to get a heap of sht for just saying this: YOU PERPETUATE WHAT YOU SAY YOU HATE!!!
I HONESTLY, REALLY think that most models are really kind of gross, and just bony skeletons in some bullsht idea of 'fashion', designed to make NORMAL women feel bad about their bodies, because they don't look like these anorexic models!
I LOVE WOMEN!!! I love working with them, and I TOTALLY HATE how they CONSTANTLY degrade themselves, and others, based on their clothes, or if they gained a pound or two!
Many times I have told several that they look really nice, and they deny it, and say they look fat, or some other BS!!!
They compare themselves to each other, and the hair, and nails, and jewelry.
What are you ladies hiding, with all this phony sht, clothes and jewelry, and makeup?
What are you so afraid of?
Do you want someone that just likes you when you look good? Personally, I want to be with someone that I like to be with, because of who she is. I don't care if she is wearing a T-Shirt and sweats, or whatever! It is HER, and who she is, that matters!!
Yeah, she looks nice, dressed up, but I don't need that to want to be with her.
Our society will always make women objects, and drive you to pay outrageous prices for makeup and shoes, and clothes, and the underthings!! (WTF? You pay that much for that little tiny thong thing?) until you stop playing into their game!!
Think about it!! If every woman, everywhere, just stopped, and said NO!! They decided to wear a T-shirt, and sweats, and white cotton briefs, what do you think would happen?
I think most guys would barely notice, and some of us would say, 'It's about time you took your power back!' and would love you just the same. . .
When I have been dating someone I think I could really care about, I kind of hope for that terrible time, but that turning point, that time when she is sick, and at her absolute worst, and HATES that I see her that way. But it is that time, that I know, even at her very worst, I still want her, I still care, and that she is the one.
Once you have seen the other, at their worst, and you still love them, what difference does a few pounds, here or there, or a 'bad hair day' matter?
It's not image, or fantasy, like the media, and fashion, it is about day-to-day life, and reality.

[Spermdumster666]

I feel like we women have played our part on putting pressure on young women and must work to remedy it. We women seemingly no matter how old are all caught in the same trap of our own making and instead of promoting stick thin models and bring overweight as ok we should be promoting education, healthy eating, exercise, sport and in general self respect. Just look at Russian and eastern European women and how they live, you will struggle to see any obesity amoung them and are healthy and in shape without sticking their fingers down their throats.

[Anonymous]

This is a problem for men as well. Every day I wonder if I am good looking, I wonder whether or not I am too fat or not muscular enough, I feel bad about myself when tons of guys around me have girlfriends but I dont. I think this problem comes from the over sexualization of society, we have sex everywhere, porn is all over the internet, naked women appear on TV commercials and ads all the time (covered by only a small sheet or something similar), on our beaches women dress in basically underwear, men dont even wear shirts, and things like the crop top, tank tops, and other hideous attire have made their way into the mainstream in an effort to sexualize society more. Additionally in most movies that aren't kids movies there is at least a sex scene, or some sort of sexual reference, most movies have more then a sexual reference, they have a few, a lot of movies have nudity, all the kids are talking about porn and sex in school, and it is now used as a way to make people feel superior to others. You dont have experience being a guy in school, but I can tell you that some guys will literally berate other guys, and pretend to be better then them because that guy has had sex with a girl or two, or 10. This over sexualization is the problem, women wouldn't feel pressured to walk around half naked if the media didn't portray half naked women everywhere, men wouldn't be so obnoxious about sex if they didn't see it everywhere (whether its on TV, in the music they listen to, in the women dressed like whores around them, etc). Its not one particular gender at fault for this mess, its all of society, I've been to other societies in Southeast Asia, and women still have some of the same insecurities you describe (looks, and body image), but it isn't as prevalent there. Vietnamese and Indonesian societies are not geared around sex, and so in the pop culture there isn't a lot of it. Coincidentally the women also dress more conservatively, the guys dont talk about sex all the time, and rape and sexual assault are much less common than in the west. Whats more is that the average age of losing virginity in these countries is something like 23(compared to 18 in the US), and most people that lose their virginity are married, so they aren't just sleeping around with anyone. When I talk to these people about American pop culture they are disgusted by what they see, and I have to explain that not all Americans approve of that garbage, and that our society is heavily sexualized.

[Opinion Owner]

This oversexualization of society is the exact reason why women (and men) are having the problems that they are having, and unfortunately its hard to stop this awful thing once its started.

[thecd1979]

It’s true for both genders. I can relate from a male perspective when I was a younger man right out of high school. There was a lot of pressure where I was at to to hook up with as many girls as you could. If you weren’t hooking up you were looked at as unmanly and looked down on by the guys that were claiming to be getting it all the time. I really wasn’t that kind of guy and didn’t mind getting to talk to and know someone a little better before doing that. I spent a lot of time at night clubs talking to trying to get with the wrong kind of girls and feeling like their was something wrong with me because I wasn’t getting laid all the time like they supposedly were. I tried really hard to impress these guys and never did, because that just wasn’t who I was. I look back on my younger years and wish I had spent more time doing other things like reading books, going out to see a movies, and hanging out with the friends that were more like I was. I can understand where your coming from, from a male view point.

[myTake Owner]

I was hoping to reach males too with my opinion. I did make it sound a bit gender biased but really was directed at young people in general men included. I never went for the popular kind of guy. I was always more attracted to the guy who wasn't being an absolute dick and was just cool to chill with and have a conversation. Unfortunately those kinds of guys wernt interested in me because I had let myself become an attention seeker, hanging with the wrong crowds of people and sleeping with giys who weren't interested in me for anything but sex which got me a bad reputation 😧

[Anonymous]

Seeing 6 year olds practice pole-dancing freaks me out, but have you seen how they tell young boys to "man up" and sacrifice themselves for ingrates. I've heard so many stories and have seen way too many news articles of young men getting victimized by all these social dynamics.
Male domestic violence victims are shamed, male rape victims are laughed at, all in the name of the constantly evolving social goal-post telling you to "Be a man". If a man hits back at a woman who is assaulting him, then he is also shamed. If a woman rapes a man, she's praised for what is apparently considered "female empowerment" for committing sexual violence.
Don't tell me that it's not okay to fight back at a female assailant for the sole reason that she is "physically weak and inferior", there are both male and female body builders, nurses, doctors, athletes, lawyers, scientists, combat troops, taxidermists (idk lol), musicians, actors/actresses, photographers, artists, game developers, serial killers, presidential candidates, fry cooks, pedophiles, twitch streamers, terrorist sympathizers, the list goes on.

Nobody tells women to "Be a woman" or "Woman up", they never get this intrusive storm of discipline, you're just pressured into being strong enough to be killed off in warfare as a reprogrammed emotionless killing machine or to become a baby-factory pleasure whore because of a government agenda.

I'm going to get my genitals pierced, YOLO.

[VomitIII]

If a kid is stupid enough to care about those things, it's no fault of the people who post here. I've never been one to worry over whether I'm "swole" or if I get all "dem hoes". I'm busy taking AP classes, raising my GPA, and working to save for college.

It's like blaming video games for mass shootings, or Miley Cyrus for little girls being sluts. It's a faulty argument.

[angeless]

It's not if people are gullible or dumb it's the fact that there is a such thing as peer pressure and depending on where you are from and the people around you, you can go from being the most confident person ever to feeling like shit and worring every second that your not pretty or skinny enough. Yeah it's good to have good grades and all but, especially teens, their world don't revole around school... What else are they going to do when they are done with their hw... people have access to the Internet and even if it's not an article about how to loose weight there are still the "ideal" images for both girls and guys that can make people feel insecure

[VomitIII]

@angeless Like I said, I've done well in school and kept out of trouble. Not my fault that they're weak-minded.

[ALittleBlondeGirl]

@VomitIII Well, not everyone is as bulletproof as you. We're all human and people having emotions doesn't make them "stupid" or "weak-minded".

[VomitIII]

@ALittleBlondeGirl If you can't look past hormones and idiot peers to see you need a good education and future, then you are weak-minded and stupid. There's no working around it.

The kind of people who worry about such things are incredibly superficial anyway, yet somehow they're societal victims. Then again, everyone's a victim these days.

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[FallOutBoy2001]

I'm all for people expressing their views, but you've just been a dick. Stop it

[ALittleBlondeGirl]

@VomitIII Jeez, I pity the woman that ends up marrying you. Try having some compassion for others.. Society impacts everyone to some degree. Even you aren't an exception. If you weren't effected, then you wouldn't be protesting on this site. But, here you are.

Like I said, we're all humans. Interacting with each other psychologically influences us. It's just how our brains are programmed.

[VomitIII]

@ALittleBlondeGirl Some of us more than others.

@FallOutBoy2001 This is exactly what I mean. People throw a goddamn hissy fit if you hurt their "feels". Cry more.

[ALittleBlondeGirl]

@VomitIII You really think high of yourself.

[VomitIII]

@ALittleBlondeGirl *highly

See? Here's a practical example right now. People who focus in school can write/type without basic grammatical errors that make them appear less intelligent.

[ALittleBlondeGirl]

You must be fun at parties.

Jokes aside, I concur. I'm not the sharpest knife in the drawer. But, at least I have a heart.

[FallOutBoy2001]

First of all, I asked you to stop being a dick. Clearly, you don't know what a hissy fit looks like, because angless, ALittleBlondeGirl, and I are not throwing one. Second of all, you do realize that some of use are working on AP classes and our GPA, and are still being bullied for not being popular or pretty?

[VomitIII]

@ALittleBlondeGirl I'm not really the partying type, but I am fairly sure I have a heart. I can always carve into my chest to make sure, if you want.

@FallOutBoy2001 Maybe not the others, but you seemed to getting your panties in a knot over it.

As for your other remark, you should have more sense than to care what the popular crowd thinks. Within a couple years, they'll all be overdosed, doing menial labor, or breeding like rats and living off the government. Your focus should be on becoming successful yourself, not worrying about what the circle of future McDonald's cashiers thinks.

[ALittleBlondeGirl]

@FallOutBoy2001 Oh sorry, I was talking to the guy. My bad.

[ALittleBlondeGirl]

@VomitIII That's not necessary.

Take care..

[myTake Owner]

Well excuse me but I do not think the take was aimed at you. Perhaps you think so highly of yourself that you believe you can have a valid opinion on a topic you clearly know nothing about. You've read so much about it yet here you are, the perfect student claiming you know better. Until you feel it and have experienced it you have no idea on the subject. I personally find you weak minded for thinking you have such a solid wall built up around you.

[myTake Owner]

*not aimed at you. Forgive my error oh perfect one. I am using my phone and make mistakes easily. Seems I cannot afford a computer as I am too busy breeding like a rabbit and living off the government after partying so hard I didn't get a proper education to land a great job.

[VomitIII]

It's not as though guys don't face some pressures - do you know how much I've been told I need to go to the gym or get an undercut or some stupid shit like that? It's not as though I don't understand it/don't face it - I just ignore it, because I have a modicum of willpower and kids today apparently don't.

I also find it funny that you talk of education so flippantly. Perhaps you were one of those always making sure your hair, figure, and so on were perfect, but never quite mastering basic arithmetic. It's not my fault you lived as a dumbass and have a lower quality of life now because of it.

[FallOutBoy2001]

I'd just like to ask, do you think I'm like that as well? Because right now, you're grabbing for straws. Everyone can see what an idiot you look like

[VomitIII]

@FallOutBoy2001 Don't you have some victim status to be claiming right now? You're like an annoying gnat, buzzing in and out of the conversation without doing much of anything.

[FallOutBoy2001]

I don't have a victim status to be claiming right now. I'm pretty busy, but I come and see how this conversation is going, and I thought I'd chime in when you got a little too rude. You've been making un-based assumptions about everyone else, and then viciously defending those un-based assumptions.

[VomitIII]

@FallOutBoy2001 "Un-based"? Really? This is why you need to pay more attention in school.

Baseless. Baseless assumptions. And they're not baseless, because all of you arguing against me clearly do struggle academically. You're corroborating my assumptions for me.

[FallOutBoy2001]

https://www.thefreedictionary.com/unbased seems to think otherwise. Maybe we have different terms, perhaps because we come from different places?

[FallOutBoy2001]

I'm probably just as intelligent as you, and they might be as well, but the difference between us and you is that we aren't stuck-up and don't think that we're better than everyone else.

[VomitIII]

@FallOutBoy2001 lol, sure. Weren't you the one that made a MyTake about people supposedly buying AKs at US gun shows? You are not in the same plane as I am, and being compared to the likes of you is unnaceptable.

I'm going to block you now, because this has continued long enough and I'm tired of your inconsequential shit. White girl superficiality is no concern of mine.

[Remonster]

As usual, the girls can't "win" and have to resort to ad-hominem and plea to emotion arguments.

[Poppykate]

Personally, I think that parents have a large part to play in a child's development. I grew up with one parent at home. My mum was really strict. Boys were for when I finished school. ( maybe that is why I graduate at 16. lol). I was to come home straight from school. If I was 10 minutes late, questions were asked. I wasn't allowed to date, as my parents thought that my focus should solely be on my education. Quite frankly, I am thankful to them for that. Today, the majority of parents work, so children go home to a empty house. ( I am not blaming parents, because this is just how life is. Bills need to be paid.) But in that time, teenagers can get up to a lot!!

[Rawrzz]

Little girls will worry about everything, anyway. There will always be an ideal. They will always want to be the ideal. It's the parent's job to raise children who are adaptable and capable of not going completely insane because they want something they can't have. It's the parents job to instill acceptance and driving for goals. In fact, it's the parents job that their kids don't get fucking obese. And 15% of them are doing a very, very bad job.

Setting an example? It's the internet. Do you know what kind of repulsive shit is on here? You can go on to fuckin' youtube and see men brutally murdered, shot and stabbed. It's the *parents* job. Not fucking mine. If the parents didn't do a good job explaining society to their children, that is hardly mine or society's fault.

Exactly how is it my job to raise your kids?

[Shorty1991]

Yeah, don't watch too much of the idiot box and take too much notice of all these photoshoped models in gossip magazines. Its OK to idolize your fave stars but it doesn't mean you have to follow the crowd and become a wannabe. Most celebs aren't natural anymore theyve had so much work done its not the real person you see. Michael Jackson wanted to look like Diana Ross and looked more like his pet monkey. Victoria Beckham only eats spinach snd looks like a lollipop, her head is bigger than her body. Healthy? I think not. Anorexic snd on the verge of putting herself in an early grave. Yes. There is such a thing as individuality, be yourself.

[LittleSally]

On all women really...
The younger you are the more it bothers/affects you. True.

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[DooMguy]

So it's not aimed at adults? Well all I say is this. If 12 year olds are doing that then their parents are a disgrace, I wouldn't even. . . uh, anyway the way I see it. Not my, child, not my brother, not my sister etc. not my problem

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I don't even know why you'd care

[angeless]

Obviously you didn't listen to EVERYTHING your parents told you and even if kids did they still have people around them to influence them or effect their emotions too... Also, even if they aren't family there is a such things as friends and sometimes there can be such a thing as a best friend so obviously your going to worry about them... Even if it's a complete stranger some people know what it's like to be in their position and they know what it feels like and if someone truly cared they would do anything or even little things to prevent another person from feeling a certain way

[DooMguy]

@angeless Not quite sure what you mean there, my parents told me a lot of things, seems like a vague statement. Oh yeah, friends I forgot about that. . . but it's not like I have any friend who's some young teen struggling with body image especially not no young girl

So. . . are you trying to say that I should have empathy? I'm DooMguy you know, empathy ain't really my thing but I can do it if its for work or any kind of assignment but in real life? I'll skip it

[SakuraChii]

I agree but I feel that problems like this gets buried into the ground and were told to suck it up. If I think that body shaming is wrong or anything related to that then in school and online I am labeled as a 'prude, feminist, undateable, jealous or ugly'.

[coachTanthony]

The interwebs are the biggest influence of all. Kids grow up quick when it comes to sex thanks to 1 click 2 click.. wow look at that. When i was a kid I had to break into my dads liquor cabinet just to peak at a playboy magazine or read an erotic story.

[Spirit_Is_Free]

Yes - You are right to be concerned but by taking part on a site like this even by answering a post on "How Do I Look?" with "In all honesty most guys are interested in your personality at the end of the day" you are doing your bit.

[FallOutBoy2001]

This is for Vomitlll:
oh I'm sorry, you ran out of defenses and had to resort to blocking me.

by the way, I got an 1850 on the SAT in 7th grade, and I'm holding a 99% in my APUSH, so yeah, clearly stupid

[Anonymous]

I love your take. I am 18 and a senior in high school. I have decided to stop worrying about my looks, boys and focus more on school, grades, extra-curricular activities, spending quality time with my family, volunteering at the local hospital. I keep myself busy and don't even think about those unnecessary things.

[myTake Owner]

I applaud you! It is a huge and hard step to take but you will benefit from this for the rest of your life! X

[Anonymous]

I'm very healthy but I still hate myself and my body. I'm tall and I feel huge compared to other girls since I have thick thighs and build muscle easier than I loose weight. It's crazy how thin is the new normal and anyone above that feels fat. We can't feel happy about being healthy if we don't fit into certain size. I'm not overweight, but I want to be underweight. So stupid

[pavlove]

people of both genders tend to focus on the negative, the angst, the problems, the pressures more so than they do the joy. you chose sex as your poison but to me it's more about learning to live somewhat independently of expectations rather than eliminating those expectations all together

[Anonymous]

Hmmm when I was that age sex was all me and my friends talked about... No one likes school and family! We focused on video games and boys and when we hit 12 we found omegle and it is a crime but we didn't know and we showed our bodies to the guys wanking off.

[Anonymous]

There's a lot of anxiety, but average age of first sex in north america has gone up, not down since we were young, and i'm pretty sure teen pregnancy rates are lower than they were 70 years ago. (The difference there of course is that most teens having kids were -married- back then).

I do think there are some odd new pressures due to social media, and a difficulty to get away from the social shredder that is school, it's like the school social system is everywhere you have internet access.

[Anonymous]

I dont think its a problem. Im 12 well just turned 13 and lost my virginity at 11. I was pressured to do it but its just part of life. Yeah I wear a shit load of makeup to make myself look better and I work out all the time. But its not really a problem. its just part of life. Guys dont like unattractive girls. can't do anything about that. Its just in their nature.

[myTake Owner]

Can't really tell if you're trolling or not.. the problem is what you have said "guys don't like unattractive girls." What one guy finds attractive others do not. I cannot understand why you think being pressured into doing something is OK. Perhaps you are too young to see where I am coming from and I hope one day you do. 11 is extremely young and excuse me for being blunt and getting on a personal level here but have you even started to get your period yet? I personally think 11 is way too young especially if you aren't even experiencing puberty yet.

[SunsetRose]

We're putting the wrong kinds of pressure on all of our young people