6 examples of internalized misogyny that appear in everyday life

Anonymous
6 examples of internalized misogyny that appear in everyday life

"Women cannot be sexist towards other women" this is something that we hear quite often. Women's bad behavior towards other women is often explained with the saying that "Women understand each other, and therefore they hate each other". That whole saying is actually sexist itself. But let's move onto everyday things that women do or say that are actually signs of internalized misogyny and need to be stopped:

1. "I only have male friends because I hate bitchiness and drama". Seriously, this is the most common type and the one that annoys me the most. I mean, it is okay to have male friends if your interests are mainly masculine, or if you just happened to meet more nice. But if the reason to having more male friends is avoiding a whole gender and calling it "bitchy" and "catty", then you should think twice. Just as it is unfair to make generalizations about men (all men are sex obsessed etc.), it is not okay to generalize all women. All people are different, it's not the gender that decides how somebody is going to be. All people fight with each other aboit stupid things and all people can be jealous. It's just probably society's standards that causes women to do it more often (if they actually do it more often). Anyways, maybe catfighting is childish, but generalizing is also a sign of being immature and not rational.

2. "I'm not like other girls". This, like the previous example, also puts women in one box. This sentence is often used after hearing something negative about women as a gender. And instead of telling the people saying these things to shut up, girls just reply with "I am not like them". This makes it sound like the girl who says this sees herself as unique because she does not fit the negative stereotype about women. But "other girls" do. No, seriously. Either ignore the people who say the misogynic things or just tell them to frick off.

3. "I am so ashamed of being a woman". Well, first of all, this sentence sounds stupid because you basically tell us that you're ashamed for something you had absolutely no impact on. But other than that, saying you're ashamed for other women makes it sound like if all women were devils that bring no good to this world. This is almost the same case as with the "not like all girls" crap.

Another thing is that the only person we humans can be ashamed of is ourselves. You have no responsibility over other people and their actions. If we'd look at all the groups that exist on Earth, we all would need to be ashamed of something because we all belong to certain groups and people of all groups are capable of doing something bad. If three bald men would murder a human, would this mean that all bald men would need to be ashamed of other bald men?

4. "You cannot take a joke, you have no sense of humour at all", as a response to a group of boys touching a girl when she doesn't want it. Yep, this actually happens too. Since we are raised to believe that "boys are funny and quirky while girls are boring", most things that men do are seen as funny while when a girl doesn't laugh at this joke, she is just considered boring. Besides, some women are just so obsessed with having a good opinion among boys that they do not care to support other females. They just do everything they think will make them be popular among boys. This can cause harm to other girls, as they will get bullied even more and can eventually end up being harrassed.

5. Slut shaming and criticizing looks. You often hear people talk about how women cannot sleep with many men without being called sluts. Also, many people are complaining how unfair the standards set on women are. But it is not only men who should stop saying things like these. Women should too, as many women have already been "programmed" to hold the same beliefs. Never criticise other women and gossip about them, just tell them what they are doing wrong and give them tips about their looks or things they are doing. We aren't going to get rid of society's standards if everybody doesn't try to fight them. Besides, saying bad things about the way other women dress etc. only makes them believe that they cannot wear what they want and have no freedom of choice.

6. "Women are gross because they have periods and make more mess in public toilets". I always hear someone say "period shaming doesn't exist! it's just a feminist's fairy tale to prove that women are always victims!" Sorry to break it to you, but I can count all the times when I got shamed and laughed at when being on my period. This may come mainly from men, but some women cause these things to continue, simply by not telling them to stop or by saying stuff like "Hide these frickin tampons! It's so disgusting to hold a box of tampons in front of so many people!". Not to mention cases when it later leads to women believing they are inferior because of being period shamed, believing that periods are a sign of weakness and being a woman is absolute hell. I also mentioned something about public toilets, right? Well, that's probably a different issue. A lot of janitors tell online how women's toilets are usually dirtier than men's, and many people, including women, come to the conclusion that "women are just nasty". Did you never think about the fact that women have a lot more problems than men, including periods and the fact that they cannot pee standing up? It is also a known fact that women visit toilets with children more often than men. The baby toilet signs are usually in the same place as the female toilet signs. You cannot generalize a whole gender as disgusting only because of public toilets. You never know how these women behave when they're at home.

There are a lot other examples, but these probably repeat themselves most often, and many of them are never even included when describing internalized misogyny. You may call me a feminist who complains about everything, but it is just important that women know what behaviors are actually toxic to other women, and that they all should stand up for themselves instead of putting each other down

6 examples of internalized misogyny that appear in everyday life
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  • Anonymous
    I have, I have been ashamed of the actions of individuals of my own gender, race, and at one point religion. Growing up I had things pounded into my head like this is how men should be. And not fitting into the catigories made me ashamed. Like why do you have to be this way to be a man? I'm ashamed that there are groups of men that dispose women, I am ashamed that there are groups of violent activists made of men. But I am ashamed of groups of women who have screamed at me as a child because I was male, or how groups of female activists in Russia would assult men in the subways leaving perminant chemical scaring because the sat how it made them comfortable. I am at this point embarrassed to have any assosiation to any major groups, religions, and have spent 10 out of my 18 years on this Earth comptamplating how much of a plague the human race as a whole is.
    Is this still revelant?

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What Girls & Guys Said

15
  • Marriedwith2
    This what happens when the Right influences young women
    • meesegoMoo

      People forget Trump was left-wing most of his life. Are those all his quotes? I recognize most of them, but are all of them just by Trump?

  • DDmggrl
    End toxic femininity.
    Restore true femininity.
    Kill feminism.
  • MountAverage
    Yeah, even as a guy I get annoyed when I hear #1.
  • Sparkling_Star
    I generally hear 1) and 2)
  • Anonymous
    ... or you're just insecure and need to grow a pair.
    • Anonymous

      What are u talking about?

    • Anonymous

      None of these are “internalized misogyny”.

      It’s just some combination of people being assholes and/or you being an asshole.

      Framing it as”internalized misogyny” only serves to frame a feminist narrative.

  • Anonymous
    Some of these are definitely internalized misogyny. But #1 is simply a case of realism.
    • Anonymous

      The cartoon image is also a case of realism. Feminism today is an embarrassment to women in general and is just undermining respect for the entire female sex.

    • Anonymous

      Welp incels and Red Pillers should be an embarassment for men too but I never heard a man who's ashamed of his gender

    • meesegoMoo

      Incels make being VOLUNTARILY celibate a chore. I really hate having to explain that. My own cousins make me embarrassed of my southern heritage.

      Number 1 is very true, but not all that misogynistic. I don't like most people, I hang around some men on a professional basis. Most men I've met bitch and gossip every bit as badly as the worst women. That's why I eschew both.

      If a woman is wonderful/amazing, I'm going to try to be more than friends if she isn't something else to me already (mentor, guide, boss, professional connection, contact for some sort of service/group).

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