I feel like there is quite a divide when it comes to this topic so I want to explain where all the anger and bitterness comes from.
I'm autistic and I didn't know that when I was in high school but I knew there was something wrong I was having trouble fitting in understanding why people did certain things I had been bullied in my first 2 years and I was anxious that it would happen again so I was hypervigilant and paying attention to what all the other students did and trying to analyze and learn from it. Because the part of my brain that was supposed to do the social stuff has been on vacation all my life I had to use other parts to try and compensate for it which is exhausting and doesn't really work that well especially with teenagers who don't do many things for logical reasons.
I was in school and back then feminism was on the rise and the main message was. White men have it the oppress other groups of people and women need to get paid more etc. You can disagree with how the message is conveyed but that's what people hear about when they hear about feminism. Or at least back then. I was looking around and the girls in my school had all the things that I was struggling with. Social skills, dating, being organized and neat with notes and school work, general having your shit together. This was the top level of high school in my country so the best 20% of students also because it focused on law and economics all the rich kids were there. I was middle class and just got there because autism allowed me to absorb information well and I was actually interested in what we were learning most of the time.
Years later most of the people I went to school with are lawyers or have a business degree and I'm on disability. Nobody can tell that I'm autistic and I didn't know back then myself but everyone can see that I'm white and male and that's why I take it personally when people spread this ideology and talk shit about me my whole life. Right now I'mliving with ex convicts recovering drug addicts and schizophrenics etc. I don't want to complain about my living standards or the people I live with because they're good atm but this is my standing in society basically and then being preached to it's not very sympathetic. I'm just one example but there are many men who are struggling a lot.
And this is the crucial point. At this point in their life will they chose to listen to a message that tells them they are oppressing other people they're overly privileged and at best sees their own issues as n afterthought, or someone who is directly targeting them with their message and seems sympathetic, seems to understand their problems and claims to want to help them?
I talk to a lot of women online and I understand the point of view. I'm just saying if you actually want to appeal to all people and include everyone, there's some work to be done. These men are lost don't have anyone to show them things about life you don't learn in school. As a kid they think they're the main character of an anime(or something like that) and then irl they're a nobody and nobody helps them find their way. So they will latch on to any mentor they can find.
But once a person is in this situation they can be lead down a dark path. First it's conservatism. Oh back in the 50s relationships were so much better, traditional women are better etc. But then it can continue to more extreme views, blaming women for everything being angry all the time.
What starts out as a need for guidance and a will to take charge of your life leads to resentment. Since there is a unending supply of young men who are lost there will always be people who wanna make money off that. It has been going on for ever and it's only getting more professional. Each person is responsible for themselves and the people they follow the ideas they believe in but this is the competition you have if you want to address the youth with a more positive message. If there was anyone else reaching out to them trying to address them maybe they wouldn't fall into this negative spiral but often the grifters are the only ones that seem to care.
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