I'm 35, she's 22, will this work?

[Anonymous]

We just got involved, both of us are really into each other and both of us have no problem with the age difference. She is mature for her age, and I look A LOT younger than my 35 years (thanks to my Asian blood). Last year I was involved with a 49 year old woman, so I know all about a generation gap. But, our friends are telling us that it will never work, it sucks not to have their support. My parents are 11 years age difference, and her's are 12 years apart. I don't see what the problem is, age is just a number as long as respect is given. Any others involved with somebody with a big age gap have any suggestions? Thanks!

[Louise123]

We don't know you - or her - so it's hard to make a judgement on this on age alone. You have seen that your parents managed to build a happy life together so it's not impossible. The important keys to consider are compatibility issues. You MUST click spiritually, intellectually, emotionally, and share the same values. Maturity also comes into play. That is a huge age gap - and how much "life" has your girlfriend lived? Will she regret l0 years from now that she didn't get to have fun and do this, that, and the other thing? That would be my worst fear. If you both have the same vision - go for it. You can't worry about the risk. There are no guarantees in this lifetime. I would advise ENJOY your relationship - make it your lst prioroity - respect and love each other. We could all walk out the front door tomorrow and get hit by a bus. Don't worry about what COULD happen. Live in the now - and try to make wise decisions to benefit both of you. The other key -- GREAT communication. If you can talk to each other - really understand each other - that is half the battle right there. Don't worry that it won't work out - focus on the POSITIVE and believe in your heart that it will. If you both are truly committed to each other and willing to work at a relationship as two mature individuals - your chances are much better. But please be aware that at age 22 - like you - she will not be the same person. Were you the same at 22? The idea is to grow together... not apart. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

You should at least give her a chance. The age difference is not the issue, the level of maturity of each of you is. Your friends need to respect your decision either way. Keep in mind that some have their shit together at 22 and are ready to settle down and some aren't in that boat until they're 45, it's all based on life experiences. If all goes bad eventually (like it could go just as bad with another 35 year old) at least you get some good partnership and sex for a few years...

[abzence]

You have already answered you question with "I don't see what the problem is"

If you don't see a problem then why are you trying to create one or listen to people that think it's a problem? Some people will always be close minded. That doesn't mean that you have to listen to them and adapt to their beliefs... just do what feels right.

[Middleman]

From what I have heard, the best age to pick your partner (for men) is to find someone half your age + 7 years. So for you she's about 2 years younger than the expected age. Nothing the matter, just see how it goes.

[jacquesvol]

It may work for years, until you get feeling (and looking) 'old' at the moment she's desperately struggling to stay 'young'. Then there will be a large gap between you two. Things might get difficult then.

[jacquesvol]

"Age is just a number". Age is, difference in age is much more than a number.

[Anonymous]

Duno, but you will have a hell of a lot of fun if you try...get to it...