Sure. Been there, done that - and I have worked in politics since the late 1980s.
What a lot of people don't get is that, although the tensions between political leaders can grow and even become bitter - as is happening right now - in general such leaders work together. They are polite and even cordial at times.
You have to work together and so you observe the courtesies. When that happens, whadda ya know, sometimes friendships form and - as happened with me, although it is less common - even intimacy and romance develops.
In my case, when I was working on Capitol Hill, it was a gal I met in another office. She was pretty and funny and we just hit it off. So I asked her out and soon we were in a very intense relationship.
For the political stuff, we either debated politely and intellectually, or alternatively we would make jokes about it. About the only thing we did not discuss, and it was more just something we did - or actually did not do - is discuss the specific goings-on in our offices.
My boss was a Republican - now retired - and her boss was a Democrat - actually still a Member of the House, although my then girlfriend no longer works there. (In fact, left long ago.) So the internal workings of our respective offices we just kept to ourselves.
The truth is, the bitterness of American politics rises and falls, but it is, in general, much worse among the public, intensified by the media than it is among those who work in politics or serve in public life. In general and not always, but broadly speaking that is the case.
To be fair, truth in advertising, our relationship did not end well. I got her pregnant and she aborted the baby without telling me. Still, the most painful thing I have ever experienced.
However, even there, the issue had not so much to do with our differing views on abortion. She used to say that she believed in it for women but not for herself. What came into play is that she was African-American and I was white and that did not go down well with her father.
Of course I cannot prove it, but I have always thought it was more her fear of telling her father that she was pregnant with a white man's baby out of wedlock than that she did not want the baby. (I will not go into the long story why I believe that.)
Could there have been a long term relationship? Truthfully, political differences, when well thought and sincerely held, reflect fundamental values and that might make a relationship stressful. It would not be easy.
This I can say, when she told me she was pregnant, I was - after the initial surprise - very happy and I was sure I was in love and I never doubted that I would stay with her and our baby no matter what. In fact, when she told me that she had aborted the baby, I cried - and even now, when I have three children and a girlfriend I deeply love (we don't want to get married), I still love the baby I never got to hold.
So for all that, would I say not to date someone of differing political views? Of course. Politics is important and holds a vital jurisdiction. However, it is not all that there is and you can find kindness and love - and hurt and regret - in those whom you disagree with.
@nightdrot So, in the end she proved you to be a fool. You actually believed that she cared about you when all she was doing was posturing to do you in. Typical demoncrat.
@JimmyQ Hmmm. If you go through life expecting perfect outcomes, you are apt to be disappointed.
For my part, I have regrets - I never knew a life worth living that did not have a few - but I have a woman that I love with all my heart and the three beautiful gifts that she gave me. Gifts who get all excited when I get home and run to me shouting "Daddy!!"
Nothing worth having comes without a price. I would rather have my happiness than your bitterness and vitriol.
Yes, because my political views are really weird. However, I wouldn't date a Republican (unless she was fucking rich lol). The thing with the modern American political parties is that they don't really represent people's morals and beliefs, so much as they do their psychology and personality. The political parties draw in numbers based on their rhetoric, and then those people tend to slowly assimilate to the beliefs that they might not have otherwise first agreed with. Cognitive dissonance.
I did single out the Republican party, but that's for a physiological reason: there is a part of the brain that is, on average, significantly larger than their Democratic counterparts. That part is called the "Amygdala", and it controls the fear (fight-or-flight) response in people (look it up, it's true). Simply put, Republicans tend to feel threatened more easily and be more afraid.
This might not be such a big deal on the surface, but fear is a pretty essential emotion and it spills over into a lot of parts of your personality. People who feel fear more often tend to be close-minded (afraid of differences), stubborn (afraid of change), conformist (afraid of conflict), irrational (afraid of reality) and paranoid (afraid of everything). None of these are good qualities to look for in a woman. Now, not all Republicans are like that, but the fact is that if you vote red and you aren't rich, then I don't know what the hell is going on in your head.
Too many of my interests are tied to politics. I don't like to say that I would not date someone purely because of their political beliefs, but some of my fundamental beliefs regarding abortion, women's rights, lght+ issues, and climate change are significant to who I am. I like to talk about politics, and I'd rather not argue with my significant issues about those issues. I'd rather go to rallies with them by my side.
There is a certain degree of political differences that I can tolerate, but beyond that I just couldn't date her. I am an anarcho-capitalist, but there are a fairly wide range of political ideologies I'd be willing to date someone who held.
I would be comfortable with any type of right-libertarian, from minarchist, to classical liberal, to conservatarian. However, I could not date anyone who belonged to an ideology that was either left of center or more authoritarian than neoconservatism.
not a citizen of US, but division of society over politics happens in Europe as well and it's amazing how "hooliganized" people became because of politicians and the NGOs pumping money in aggressive propaganda. They act like those 70s-80s football fans looking to beat the shit out of the others if given the chance. And it's hurting societies we live in, not the politicians. So while I would date a girl with different political views, I have a feeling others wouldn't or would break up over it.
There are basic differences in the way people think. Anyone who can say they are a democrat and keep a straight face is a fool. If you are dumb enough to lay down and sleep with a fool, the real question should be, just how smart do you think you are?
Lately it's become impossible to even discuss politics among people with opposing views. I'm an independent and I loathe the 2 party system. I will look at an individual candidate and want to see their record and know their positions MORE than which party they support. But it's become SO polarized now (it began with W. Bush/Cheney, got fueled by Boehner & Ryan & McConnell, and lord knows how many Pelosi haters there are) that it's nearly impossible. The thing is, I haven't met a Repub who isn't a Trumper, and if a girl supports someone that ignorant and vile, there's no way I could date her.
Yes of course. My political views are quite unique, I'm a centrist, meaning I am actually very much on left on some topics (e. g. social safety net, immigration) and on the right on some others (e. g. liberal economy). I'm french so I'm probably very on the left comparing anywhere you can be in the US political spectrum. But anyway my point is that I respect much, much more people with different political opinions but with sensible arguments and able to talk about it, than some people who would vote for the same party i do but don't even know why. I do have some values that are important, but then if you don't share them your personality is just not compatible, but this actually doesn't limit the political spectrum that much. Sorry for complicated answer, and relatively bad English.
Well it was reported that 67% of self id Democrats have none or a few friends of different political views
Self Id Republicans reported in 58% that they have none or a few friends of differing political views.
So in the world of dating - especially during the current climate fueled by 24/7 sensational media, - you would have less relationships of differing views.
Women are primarily democrat and women choose who to date, since all power is in their hands it would be my understanding there would be hardly any heterogeneous relationships in terms of political ideology.
I wouldn't date anybody like that. It's ridiculous. Morality matters more, I won't date anybody who's partisan regardless of the party. Either lying, unrealistic Democrats, or lazy, lying Republicans. My allegiance can't be to people, but rather to a practice.
All other stuff can be talked through, when you don't worship people you can be reasoned with. The classical liberal idea of freedom to speak and think as you wish is my only other condition.
I mean I'm a huge conservative and my girlfriend is moderate, some things we agree with some we don't and to be honest a lot of it I dont even know it doesn't really concern us all that much, and I've had a very liberal girlfriend before who it did affect because of how radical we both were, so yes, you just have to find the right person who you'll love enough that you'll both not care and always find a compromise
I think it depends on how far from center they are. I consider myself a moderate that leans to the right. I have cancelled dates when I realized the person was too far right for my more centralist ideals. On the other hand, I had a girlfriend who had a slightly left lean and we got along fine.
To some extent sure. I’m a moderate independent so I don’t really care if someone is a republican or a democrat. I can agree with certain policies from either party. I have no party loyalty. I wouldn’t want to date a fanatic, but just being part of one party or the other would not bother me.
If you're taking your political views so serious that you would reject a potential partner just because of different political opinion, then you need a psychiatrist. Parties are just sock puppets of lobby groups and big capital, no matter which color of tie they use to wear.
I wouldn't say "yes" or "no" exactly but wouldn't be closed to such a possibility if I was single. I lean towards the right-libertarian side which tends to be considered moderate on a one-dimensional political spectrum (although I'm not sure it should be one-dimensional) with usually some overlap with the views of both democrats and republicans (although I align more with republicans these days). Typically I can get along well enough with both.
I would not choose a partner because of a specific party she favours. But it reflects her views, and it is likely that because of her different ideas in general we would not get closer with each other. B. t. w.: did others notice as well that the elephant has a very SMALL ... tusk?
Yes, it wouldn't matter to me. Share a story all my Fathers late parents were Republican. So they were Christians like and Conservative. When my Father met my Mother ( late) she came from Family that was Democrats. So this is common to happen but in this case some people switch to whatever Political Party their Spouse happens to be in this case my Father , switched to Democrat. I learned about this in History class this happens in many cases.
Well I consider myself independent so I don't care. Politics have never really mattered to me. 🤷♀️ I don't pay attention enough to really have an opinion one way or the other.
@meesegoMoo We're both very much in the middle of the two main parties in terms of our values. So it wasn't like we were die-hard on our respective "sides" or anything. We were engaged during the last election and after the results came out he DID ask if we could still get married lmao
Funny. I can't stand either party. Good on you for not being to far either way, I've never met anybody remotely intelligent who was. Very considerate of your now-husband to ask. I'm glad you two work well enough that it wasn't a big deal.
@meesegoMoo Well, at least you know who cancelled each others vote out. Maybe you should just go out to dinner next election and focus on enjoying each others affection instead of the all the hassle.
I would date someone with different political views but i hope they aren't to stubborn on it. Like there is no Ideal Political view and every political view will have some positives and some Negatives. You have to open to criticisims and ready to accept mistakes. If the person is too stubborn it would be hard. Even I have to be the same open to chance and understand flaws
I dont consider a person's political views to be all that they are. Although I would very quickly grow tired of someone is dogmatically leftist and SJW because of their unreasonable infatuation with gender and race and generally how they use it as a lense to judge others. That shit is toxic as hell
Hell no. The more I've talked to liberals, the more I see they are dishonest, hypocritical, back stabbing kinds of people without logic. I don't even want them as friends anymore either. It seems like all they do is hate White people, especially White men, hate Christians, and hate anyone that supported Trump.
@supercutebutt How about you be a typical liberal idiot and go do some drugs, steal from working people to help illegal criminals, have sex with a bunch of people and pop out plenty of welfare kids and then whine why no good person wants you. lol You are retarded. What a moron scumbag. You are a no good POS person.
It's not even an issue to deliberate on, its a simple yes, our dating is not a political affair neither does the party play any role in my love life so long she feels the same way I do towards her that's all that matters
You guys should wake up and trash that two party system and see that the world is more diverse and your partner is bound to have other ideals then you. See it as a opportunity for discussion instead of a reason for arguments.
I would as long as they have the same morals as mine, like more forward and liberal I guess, but I would avoid talking politics and if they were Republican, I'd like more of a liberal republican? I don't know if that's even a thing.
Older conservative more likely. Typically the thought is "whatever doesn't hurt me or mine". They likely have a different view on trannies still. Even to me that's an abuse of the mentally unwell.
I dont really want to date someone who has their political party set in stone. Instead I want to date someone who has certain values (that align with mine) and then will choose the political party that best represents them.
Date sure, but i am quite outspoken so it would fall or stand with her ability to accept my views either by converting or by enjoying or not caring about the differences.
I'm center right like 2 points from the side of the page and I'd date a classic liberal (non authoritarian liberal) on the right or left I can't stand government supremacy.
I can’t do that. I can’t date someone who doesn’t vote for Trump in the 2020 election. I have to date someone who supports Trump, is pro-life, a true Christian, loves our troops and believes in closed borders
I doubt i could. Too many fundamental beliefs are tied to it. I want to own guns and she is against them. An uplanned preg happens and I don't believe an abortion is right but she does. etc...
Yes. Because I'm open-minded, and also because I believe that there are many things in life that are a lot more important than politics. Not that issues don't matter. But people matter more. The most important thing is loving people.
Nope... why would I want to be with somebody who is completely against everything I'm for? There is no way, there would always be arguments and disagreements. I would rather be with somebody who is on the same page as me, it makes life so much easier
Been there done that. It was to the point that if I asked her out for a last minute dinner I'd get a speech about how men use last minute plans to manipulate and control women.
I’d be reluctant, but if we had plenty of other commonalities, I would give her a chance — provided that I wouldn’t be scolded for having my own political opinions
0
0 Reply
Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
It would depend on the views/opinions. I'm liberal in many ways, but I'm actually neutral or understand the opposing opinion on a lot of issues.
Me and my partner must understand ideologies are constructive and every ideology have their own way of justifying it... Rationality is also essential wn u r supporting it... No one is perfect and same goes with ideologies and we must accept ds
@dhiraj2489 exactly :) I need my partner to have a valid reason for thinking the way they do rather than simply following their parents' footsteps and blindly agreeing with that.
My answer uses to be "yeah, absolutely." But people have become so extreme this last decade or so that now I have to say "as long as they're not extreme, yes."
They can have some different views but I don’t want to be with someone whose values are drastically different from mine or have extreme views such as fascist or communist sympathies.
A typical democrat 25 years ago was just left if center.. with some views to the right... reasonable. There are still such people, but they have been terrorized by the extreme left.
The nice thing about that is how the centre left and centre right can come together as allies against the extremes. For example Dave Rubin (Rubin report on YouTube), a centre left liberal has spoken at TurningPointUSA events and has had many friendly discussions with Ben Shapiro. (Btw I spell center as centre because I’m British)
@Catlover1999 Well, your nation is pretty much a wash and the USA is going through a real struggle to try and not follow you down the drain. I really don't think this is any time to be offering conciliatory comments to the enemies of civilization. But, like you said, you never even learned how to spell and your failed culture is all you have to cling too. Pretty desperate if you ask me!
@jabbahut Trump is a democrat himself along the lines of JFK. The lunatics that now consider themselves to be progressives are so far off the ranch that they aren't fit to live and only God seems to be concerned. There is your real problem.
That's cool. I like cats, but I'd never say I love them. People can get the wrong impression.
I think you've looked past the most obvious problems with the demoncrats. They are all just paid liars and their followers are willing fools. Together they are hell bent on the destruction of the world. Our courts are no long places were justice can found. They political hot beds of deceitful people with an agenda.
Thank God, we Americans have been smart enough to never give up our guns.
I would not date a socialist. Socialists are responsible for the death of over 40 million of my people. If she were a centrist, it would be acceptable.
Holidays 
Girl's Behavior 
Guy's Behavior 
Flirting 
Dating 
Relationships 
Fashion & Beauty 
Health & Fitness 
Marriage & Weddings 
Shopping & Gifts 
Technology & Internet 
Break Up & Divorce 
Education & Career 
Entertainment & Arts 
Family & Friends 
Food & Beverage 
Hobbies & Leisure 
Other 
Religion & Spirituality 
Society & Politics 
Sports 
Travel 
Trending & News 
+1 y
+1 y
Most Helpful Opinions