Neighbor hung up a half American half rainbow flag in my neighborhood?

[blueonblack22]

Updates

1 y

I posted this prematurely by accident. Anyway I could care less if it was a pure rainbow flag. I would just ignore it. But what disgusts me about the half American half rainbow flag is that it’s dishonoring the American flag itself. THAT is what I don’t like.

Anyway I know this woman put up this flag WANTING and HOPING someone to complain or even better do something about it. Her end goal is to be able to say “look at all these homophobic bigots in my neighborhood!” She wants to be a victim.

Updates

1 y

And thing is she already lives in a very deep blue state. I live in a suburb only a few miles from Denver. If you drove to Denver you would see rainbow and trans flags EVERYWHERE. My neighborhood is just older and more quiet. You see American flags occasionally but it sure as hell isn’t “maga” country or something. So why is this lady doing this? I hate seeing it when I walk out my front door.

[Caroline91]

How do you know what her intent is? Have you asked her or interacted with her in the past? I understand that it is difficult to have something that is offensive to you constantly in your face. A lot of the political signage in people’s yards is offensive to me and I wish it would disappear, but I know I just have to look past it, liberally

[blueonblack22]

I live in an upper middle class retiree neighborhood. It’s well kept up and quiet. It’s a bit boring but that’s totally fine. I own my townhouse and I’ll take boredom over riff taffy any day. But I notice a lot more riff raff going on in urban neighborhoods (crime) that often has lots of rainbow/trans flags. To me it’s a sign of other non gay/trans issues coming to my neighborhood (e. g. illegal migrants/crime)

Anyway nobody in our neighborhood is hanging up MAGA flags OR rainbow flags. You see occasional American flags which should be NON political but for some people that is “political”.

Anyway she is the only person doing this in my neighborhood. Only one. And she so happens to be 50 yards away from me.

So why is she doing this? Why. What’s the point?

I get a feeling she things she is either “rebelling” and/or trying to be a “missionary” because my tiny neighborhood is older and more old school. So if I speak up about it she will get exactly what she wants: to be victim who is “fighting” for equality or some faux altruism bs.

[Caroline91]

@blueonblack22 I not saying to "speak up" about it. I'm suggesting just asking why she put it up. You something like "Out of curiosity... what's your thought behind displaying this particular flag? Oh... interesting." That's a neutral question. It could be done in a vey noncommittal way and then at least your why? question would be answered. Who knows, it could end up in an interesting discussion... or not.

[blueonblack22]

@Caroline91 if we lived in normal times I would do that. If it was 2014 or something I would do that.

But let’s say a thoughtful democrat such as yourself lived in my quiet neighborhood. Would you hang up a half rainbow half American flag when nobody else around you is doing that? Maybe you would hang up a rainbow flag maybe not. Maybe you would put up a “Harris Walz 2024” sign on your lawn and/or windows. Maybe not.

But I would have to imagine you would think twice about going as far as having a half American half rainbow flag on your front porch. I would imagine you would think twice about how some people might view you using the American flag in that context could be received.

This woman has to be at least in her mid 40s too. She’s been around long enough to understand the message you are sending when you twist the American flag with other political messaging. She’s definitely no 20something far left university college grad who naively doesn’t realize the message she’s sending.

So that leads me to believe that any confrontation I have with her about this will not end well. No matter how politely I bring it up. Again I think she’s expecting (and likely hoping) someone will say something negative. Then her self imagined prophecy that “she’s fighting the good fight” will come true in her own world. It will get that adrenaline rush going for her.

Also given I am a 6ft athletic white guy who dresses modestly (with no tattoos) she’s likely going to assume my political leanings quickly. I don’t dress or act like a hipster. I don’t dress like a red neck either. But still it’s not the same as if another woman or a minority male confronted her about it.

I am most likely not going to do anything. Chances are she wants attention and the best thing I can do is not notice.

But still walking out my door and seeing that everyday is really driving me nuts.

[Caroline91]

@blueonblack22 Lol... I'm sorry... there is so much to unpack here and you really can be funny! First, I would like to clear up one misconception: I am not a Democrat.

You're probably right, it wouldn't be a good idea for you to confront her. Although the current idea in our society today that everything we disagree on has to be deemed a "confrontation" I just don't get. You're a human being, I'm a human being... I'm on your side, even when we disagree. if the Boogey Man comes after you or yours, I'll be one of the first out my door to help chase 'im away. I would most likely arrange to be taking a walk around the neighborhood sometime when I saw her out side and stop for a friendly chat.

And you're right, I wouldn't have something like that on my porch. I'm not one for grand gestures, you're more likely to find me doing volunteer work, trying to make my community a better, happier place. And I don't really care what political party you belong to, if you'd like to join me.

I don't look at someone and assume from outward appearances what political party they might belong to. My family are almost all members of the Republican Party and we go back generations as residents of San Francisco, that great hipster bastion. And me? By that metric, if you just looked at me, you would say "Republican" but, then, when I open my mouth you would say "Democrat" when, in truth, I am neither.

I really do understand how annoying it is to have to look at something that so deeply offends and fee unable to do anything about it. For cases like this, I have taught myself to have "selective" vision. It's amazing what I can manage not to see when I don't want to!!

[blueonblack22]

Yeah that’s what I am doing right now. This lady also moved in recently and I know she is just a renter. In a way it figures. It’s easier to be a dbag when you are a renter because it’s so easy to relocate if you don’t like your neighbors. I’ve never spoken to her before. But when you buy a place you are married to it.

The thing is we have a VERY strict HOA in our neighborhood. Too strict at times. But overall it’s a good thing because it keeps things looking good which retains property values.

Anyway yes I did assume you were democrat given our earlier conversation over Harris vs. Trump. I won’t go down that rabbit hole on that right now. I do appreciate your critical thinking approach though.

As for the neighbor I wish there was a low risk way to at least ATTEMPT to do something without it blowing up into all the drama she most likely wants in the first place.

And I truly believe all the LBTQA yah de yah movement at this point is NOT about gay rights anymore. I believe it’s a guise for “equity” and income redistribution communist bs. So seeing an American flag that is turning into communism absolutely disgusts me.

[blueonblack22]

Well lo and behold I walked by my neighbors house yesterday and the flag was gone! Never said a word about it to her or did anything. She took it down

[Caroline91]

Well, Holy Moly, will wonders never cease. Happy for you! lol

[Daniela1982]

So it won't be burned by either gay or straights.

[Anonymous]

Lots of American flags are bastardized into different things that clearly are not proper American flags by the official rules. Take for instance the thin blue line flag, or the flags warped into the shape of skulls or antlers. There's even camo American flags. Most people don't giveea shit about making sure it's up to code. They just want to make it a little fancier and show they support the country AND something else, or from a specific angle.

A half American half pride flag is just like that from the other side of the isle. She supports America and all its lgbt+ citizens. In fact this is probably a better reason to mess up the flag than most bc of how often American flags are used by people who hate minorities, having just an American flag up could send the wrong message & so she makes sure the pride flag is also included so that it's clear she also supports that community (and/or is part of it herself).

& it's real fucking full of yourself to assume the reason she put it up is that she's WANTING negative attention. Do you also think women who wear short skirts are "asking for it" just because YOU get horny when you look at them? This isn't about you. People put pride flags up the same reason they put American flags up: they're proud & want to show support.

And bonus for flags like the pride flag—they want to show they're safe. That there's a house in the neighborhood that doesn't hate lgbt+ people. For kids especially but for anyone lgbt+, that can be a huge comfort. It's scary sometimes with all the bad shit you hear about, & especially around election season with so many more political signs & flags that are so associated with hate. Seeing someone who lives near you is at least some form of ally can be huge relief as a member of the community.

So get ur head out of ur ass & mind ur own business. She's not doing anything wrong.

[JSkye]

I doubt she is fishing for confrontation.

That flag is heavily implying that she is liberal, but the actual implications of that flag just means that she supports LGBTQ+ rights in America and that she believes that those rights shouldn't be up for debate.

The actual purpose for posting up LGBTQ+ flags is to either

A). Signal to others that you are

B). Signal to others that you are a safe space and an ally

Seeing as it is a generic rainbow mixed with the American flag, I would tend to suspect the latter.

Also, just because someone supports LGBTQ+ causes doesn't automatically make them a liberal. You can be conservative and a supportive ally. Albeit rare, I have seen it.

Additionally, from reading the over everything in this thread, I am going to guess you live in Parker? If that's the case, there are actually a lot of maga flags going up around town (I know because I also live there). If that's the case, I strongly suspect that it is the second option that I presented and she is trying to show the LGBTQ+ community that they are still supported in the area.

[Telekinetic-Potato]

I think I speak for most MAGA people when I say as annoying and maybe even disrespectful as it is, it's not desecration and it comes with the territory if you want to live in a free nation with the beautiful first ammendment.

Even if to someone like me the pride flag represents conglomerate companies spending obscene amounts of money and using incredibly manipulative practices to take control of the country and turn us into essentially slave workers, that lady has an equal right to see it as a sign of the liberation this country stands for. Even if I think she's drinking the kool-aid like a vape head when they find a knock off mango juul pod.

[Anonymous]

How did you post a question without body? Only updates?
I’ve never seen that.

Anyhow, I agree that it should not be half and half but perhaps those people sr evita American and gay which is why they want to make a statement with their flag.

it wouldn’t really bother me because I don’t have a strong hate or issue with gays as long as they’re not trying to brainwash children.

my suggestion to you or advice is if you want a stress free life and be happier, then try your best it ignore things that are out of your control until you master it. If you always give such importance to things that bother you that you can’t change, then it will lead to anger and stress everyday and you allow them to make you live an unhappy life.

[AviatorTom]

Sometimes we just have to let people do what they want, and have the right to. I would't like a half-and-half flag either, but I respect the right of others to voice their opinion, and the First Amendment guarantees that.

Maybe you should just look the other way?

[snowboarder720]

Hahaha!! That isn’t the American flag though. That’s half of the American flag.
Meanwhile MAGA rednecks are wearing the American flag and desecrating it at Trump rallies.


https://images.app.goo.gl/Nv3WSn7RxbHHi1WM7

https://images.app.goo.gl/GfmVT5uxoAi3Q8PbA

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Do you get this up in arms when you see MAGA Republicans wearing American flag shirts and shorts? I mean technically those are desecrating the flag too. If so, feel justified. If not, then move on and just let it be.

[KostasKouvalis]

I normally disagree with you, but you're 100% right here. They literally pick and choose which flag etiquettes should be honored. Not to mention the Blue Lives Matter flag. If they're gonna make a list of flag etiquette, they should honor it too.

[blueonblack22]

Did you read my post? Again I already live in a deep blue state. I could care less if it was pure rainbow flag or new “trans” flag. I do not live in MAGA country at all. I have never owned or wore anything about “maga”. I know leftists are quick to make tons of wrong assumptions about guys like me who dare criticize what they are doing. They are quick to label guys like me as some sort of gun toting, pick up driving maga cap wearing redneck. But I am not like that.

But just having a pure rainbow flag isn’t good enough anymore for leftists. A trans flag isn’t good enough either. She has to take things a step further and dishonor the American flag herself.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

I read your post and never said you had a problem with lgbt people. My question to you is if you get up in arms when you see MAGA people do it. Again, never said you owned anything. For someone asking if I read your post you sure didn't read anything in mine. Just got up in arms about things I never said.

[KostasKouvalis]

He won't answer my question either. It seems to me that he sees the LGBT thing as disrespectful to our flag, but he doesn't see the other stuff as disrespectful

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

That's a shame, but not surprising.

[blueonblack22]

Funny how you both rubbed off on each other to quickly come to that conclusion. Funny how it’s quickly about “what aboutism”.

I got one simple question. If I kindly and calmly asked this lady why she put up this flag, she gave her response and if I did ANYTHING less then 100% agreeing with her…. how will the interaction end? I am guessing most likely not well. Her just disliking me as a neighbor is probably the best outcome I could ask for. But I know she would never take it down. In fact she would portably double down with more similar flags.

But that’s the adrenaline rush she wants. The faux altruistic feeling of “fighting the good fight”. To feel morally superior.

I am not crazy about any variation of the conservative flag including the ones you mentioned above. But one key difference is how often do people who hang those flags intentionally predict and hope for negative responses? How often do those people hope for vandalism, media coverage or more?

[blueonblack22]

*including the conservative flags

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Oh look you finally answered the question.

Both sides do it for the same reason; to express their point of views to others. I doubt they are looking for media coverage and certainly not vandalism. Both sides equally think their side is the correct side and co-opt the American flag into their message.

You have no idea what she wants otherwise. Maybe what she wants is just to find like minded individuals to become friends with for all you know. Stop thinking the worst of people.

[KostasKouvalis]

Someone sounds triggered that one of the 25 flag etiquette was violated. It's no different then the Police Lives Matter flag. PERSONALLY, I think the American flag should stay the American flag. But if the MAGAS are allowed to altar it, then Leftists should be allowed to altar it too. If her flag bothers you, then the Police Lives Matter flag should bother you too. Or are you only bothered by messages YOU don't agree with?

[KostasKouvalis]

By the way, the pride flag was appropriated from the Inca flag and I don't see Incas complaining. It makes me laugh how sensative Americans get over a piece of fabric😂

[blueonblack22]

NOBODY I mean NOBODY hangs up trump/maga flags in my neighborhood.

I am a moderate conservative but I have never done something like. I don’t care about maga caps, shirts, flags, etc. And hanging up an American flag is not and SHOULD not be a political democrat/republican issue. But in modern times it is which is ridiculous.

[KostasKouvalis]

I wasn't talking about MAGA merchandise. I was talking about Conservatives altering the American flag. Maybe they don't do it in YOUR neighborhood, but they do it elsewhere. You're refusing to answer my question, like you're refusing to answer Ez-Bri's question. So it seems to me that you don't see the Police Lives Matter flag or American flag apparel as disrespectful.
I will try asking it THIS way.

Would you be offended/upset if someone hung up a Police Lives Matter flag? Yes or No?

[msc545]

I have no idea but it sounds kind of odd. I think you should just knock on her door and politely ask her. You might have a nice discussion.

[blueonblack22]

If we lived in a reasonable society that is exactly what I would do. But in my past experiences having a disagreement with someone about their outward political behavior NEVER ends well. No matter how polite and considerate I am about it. Chances are she hung up this flag WANTING someone to criticize her over it because the drama of being “in a fight” gives her an adrenaline rush and makes her feel relevant. The worst thing that happen to her is she would just be completely ignored and nobody says anything about it.

I’ve also thought about complaining to the HOA or at least asking hanging up flags like that. It used to be illegal to desecrate an American flag like that (I know it’s not now). But it’s been up for over a month now and they already know. So I doubt they care or even the do care they too are worried about this woman WANTING negative attention about this so she can be in “a fight” which is what she wanted all along.

[blueonblack22]

*at least ask then about their policy about hanging up flags liken this.

[blueonblack22]

Well lo and behold I walked by my neighbors house yesterday and the flag was gone! Never said a word about it to her or did anything. She took it down

[msc545]

Interesting. I wonder if she took it then or if somebody else did?

[exitseven]

Everyone has the right of self expression. I have one of those Back The Blue flags.

[DrPepper12]

So? Isn't a "back the Blue" flag a half flag too - same design, different colors?

[purplepoppy]

Her property her choice.

[msc545]

I tend to agree with this but she is obviously trying to be provocative and unless that gets resolved that could potentially end badly for her. I think it might be better if he spoke to her.

[purplepoppy]

Why? doesn't she have the right to freedom of expression or does that only apply to hate speech. I don't support the lgbt thing but people should be able to fly a flag without worrying about reprisals.

[msc545]

Except that reprisals are a real thing now.

[blueonblack22]

@purplepoppy it’s funny that someone from the UK says they have the freedom to “expression” considering all the Orwellian anti free speech laws being passed in your country.

But factual you are correct. In the USA we have the 1st amendment. And it used to be illegal to desecrate the American flag here until a stupid supreme court ruling back in 1989.

But I never argued she doesn’t “have a choice” to do what she wants on her property. But I have a choice to not like and confront her about it if I wanted to.

But her being confronted is actually WHAT SHE ULTIMATELY WANTS. She’s at least 45 and she knows what message she is sending.

So I won’t give it to her what she wants. But still (and I know you would side with her) I wish there was a legal way to get rid of it. I’m not going to do something stupid (steal/burn it). Besides getting in legal trouble I know she would actually LOVE for that to happen.

[purplepoppy]

That's the big difference between us. If someone flys a harmless flag in their garden we don't feel the need to confront them. I guess that's why out murder rate is so much lower.

[Steve-Handjobs]

@blueonblack22 Not only do I wave my own rainbow flag with pride, but I will come to your house on 9/11 with my bang bros and have a circle jerk on your front yard. It will escalate into billionaire group sex, where extravagance meets uninhibited pleasure. Your wife will get so hot looking at my opulent friends, that she will feel compelled to play the Russian trombone while she tosses my ass salad.

[blueonblack22]

Well lo and behold I walked by my neighbors house yesterday and the flag was gone! Never said a word about it to her or did anything. She took it down

[Steve-Handjobs]

I wish I could take you down @blueonblack22 , or rather go down on you and grip your balls lightly while @Justin_HugeThroat took your manhood all the way down while @Jacob_StrokeChild grips your manly shaft.

[John_Cobretti]

Sick Kamala supporter

[NamerOfStars]

Ah, the horrors of free expression.

[Guacamole409]

You can’t much more bigoted than the rainbow flag.

[Maybeyoutoo]

You should take down the rainbow flag now

[blueonblack22]

Trust me that sounds tempting. I would replace it with hammer and sickle communist flag to show her true colors.

But it’s funny that while you don’t hear about anybody’s being punished for desecrating/vandalizing the American flag this is what happens to people who do that to rainbow flags.

This is a true story and beyond insane. This guy got sentenced to 15 yes 15 years in prison for burning a rainbow flag.

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/amp/ncna1105131

[Agape93]

Okay?