I'm getting gaslighted & ghosted by nearly every person I interact with?

[Anonymous]

I don't know what to do in this circumstance & why it is constantly happening?

[David318578]

Well its either all the people you meet are the problem.. or your the problem.

Of course you gave no information so we have no idea on how to help you. You have to give specifics

[Asker]

Read what I put down below with the previous user on the question & I'll explain the rest.

[David318578]

Update your question so everyone reading it will have the information

[Asker]

You can't once posted.

[David318578]

Yes you can

[sawno]

That might mean you have a really boring conversation style.

[Asker]

What's conversation style?

[sawno]

Basically what you say to people and how you say it. The topics you bring up, etc.
Lets say its a conversation in DM's between two people.

The bad example:
A: Hi
B: Hello
A: How r u?
B: I'm good how about you?
A: Good also [This is already a potential where the person won't reply anymore, its a closed answer and so far no topic was introduced]
B: Why did you message me?
A: I'm bored
Now its done. You won't talk to that person ever again.

But lets do the good example (assume both are honest):
A) Hey! I saw your post about X, does that mean you also do Y a lot?
B) Oh hey! Yes I do that all the time actually its really fun.
A) I knew it! I also do Y a lot and I noticed it had a lot in common with X but I especially like Z about it.
B) I don't like Z as much I mostly do it because I just really like Y. Whats your favorite thing about it?
*Conversation can easily continue, the two will eventually jump from topic to topic*

See the difference? Of course my examples are a bit plain and artificial even in the second one because I didn't use a real example. But it should still show the difference between a very open style and a completely lame closed style that communicates nothing.

[Asker]

I have been ghosted on all those conversations starters that you mentioned here

[sawno]

Well if you relate to both of them then at least you know why some of them failed. It ultimately falls or stands how compatible you are with the person you talk to. In general online conversations eventually die out.

[Asker]

I'm guilty of the first few when I first started dating & talking online. Then in the last five years I've been doing second examples but even then I still receive the same treatment. So I still don't kw what wrong.

[sawno]

Some of it is inherent to the dating platforms, but part of it will be the topics you bring or the purpose behind it. For example us messaging back and forth here on this question will end when I consider that I shared everything I have to say on the topic. Thats just natural.

[Asker]

Yh I expect that to happen. My concern is if example two which I have been using more nowadays are giving me the same result. So now I'm like what do you even say anymore to people.

[sawno]

Something meaningful ideally, for me I get bored real quick when conversations lack meaning or have no actual purpose. Especially if they aren't even fun. Its super organic. Lets take the dating out of it for a moment, got any online friends you DM with? If so, how does that go by comparison?

[Asker]

No issues guys are always happy to talk to me or at least don't air.

[Abbycado]

How would any of us know if you don’t?

[Asker]

So you never experience it?

[Abbycado]

No, and I’m around a lot of people every day. I go to a huge university and interact with lots of people.

[Asker]

Ahh I'm not in education despite being 24 . So I only get to interact with people at work or if I wanted to go shopping.