A woman's only " true" value is her beauty?

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

I remember this quote from English class a few years ago:;

" My strong boy...My pretty girl."

That's all society tells women they need to be. We get praised for such a stupid superficial trait - just one major trait, and it's so shallow and ridiculous.

Men on the other hand are praised to be strong, diligent, hardworking, progressive etc - those are amazing traits to strive for, it gives men so much worth than just how he looks.

Women on the other hand - I keep hearing " if your not a pretty girl, your pretty much nothing."

Like really? So if that ugly girl is hardworking, ambitious, cures cancer or something - she's still worthless?

See what I'm saying? And I think that's why women have been placed as second to men for so many centuries, and still aren't taken as seriously as men today. Society trains us girls that the only thing we should be is pretty. That's all we need in life to get by.

Why can't we be icons for more than just beauty? Why can't women be more than just materials, clothes and make up?

Those things don't last, and it devalues women in such a twisted way.

It kills how we see ourselves - so many girls are unable to go out the house with some type of make up on, can't accept their natural beauty, hate their bodies, hate themselves - and we honestly shouldn't, because we should be able to seek value in more than just the physical.

But we don't because that's the only idea society wants us to be, and we're so brainwashed we don't even care to realize there's way more to us.

When will women be more than just pretty faces?

Even men have complained about this female focused phenomenon, asking why girls can just be pretty and nothing else.

That's what I want to know too lol - I would think a strong hardworking guy, would want a strong hardworking woman at his side. Not some ditzy female who's going to mooch and beg for everything from him.

So what are your thoughts?

[Anonymous]

We've been the "second sex" for most of history. Our worth has been historically measured by how men value us and how we benefit men. In western societies (in eastern as well), we are measured by our utility. It's difficult to pull out of centuries of what was literally legal slavery.

Although as a gender, we have been allowed a bit more versatility. We have rights, more equality, etc. All that remains are silly arguments for the "laws of the strongest" and this perpetuation of sh*tty media that tells everyone that beauty is important. Beauty is almost a weapon of sorts. Those who have it can choose to use it or not, but beautiful women have a ton of power because historically, a successful man has a beautiful wife (Rousseau wrote about this as well).

Because men rejected gender equality for so long, when it finally came along some felt the need to hold on to their masculinity which in many cases can be confirmed by attaining a beautiful women. On the other hand, if they date women who are too intelligent and they aren't extremely masculine or comfortable with their level of masculinity, they would almost feel emasculated.

And although ugly girls aren't actually worthless (regardless of ambition or not), they are worthless to men who need to have their masculinity reaffirmed.

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

ooh very true. Wow that's really sad.

So this dynamic exist because men wouldn't be able to handle strong beautiful women? Like they'd feel emasculated ultimately?

[Opinion Owner]

the really traditional ones probably would. they certainly all avoid me like the plague :P

[peace-love-couture]

The truth is, as much as we enjoy complaining about society's views on women and men, beautiful women know the advantage(s) they have and men love beautiful women and value them more.

Too many times have I seen guys place beauty over personality or intelligence or character. Guys will go through a hellish relationship just to have armcandy.

Guys are often intimidated by girls with strong personalities or who are intelligent and successful, they feel threatened, less masculine. So it doesn't help that guys are overly sensitive when it comes to that stuff.

As long as women with beauty continue to abuse(not all do, but many do), society will base our values off of it.

I think one of the saddest things I've seen on here is when a user(guy or girl, can't remember) asked a question about what behaviors both attractive and unattractive women should accept in relationships and there were some guys saying that unattractive women will and should deal with behaviors an attractive woman wouldn't. Such as cheating and abuse. I was like "really?" A woman simply wanting respect is determined by attraction.

[peace-love-couture]

But no, a woman's true value ISN'T beauty in my opinion. Beauty eventually fades, but so can memory and intelligence...so it's all pretty much subjective.

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

Great answer - no way some idiots really said that about the whole ugly girls should put up with certain things? Wow.

Your answer makes a lot of sense though - like it is a male dominated world, and since guys do focus so much on female beauty, naturally that'd be all we're held to.

I mean, it's not a horrible thing because I mean, we can just get by off of looks, but at the end of the day, I think we should be given a little more credability than that :\

[pr3ttybr0wn]

Women can be more than just their looks, but it won't matter to the majority of the people anyway. Society praises beautiful women for being beautiful more than they'll ever praise an ugly woman that was hardworking, nice, smart, etc. There is an advantage to being beautiful so instead of whining about it, I want to have it all, that way I can have status in society but be fulfilled in my personal life. I've seen guys go out of their way to be nice to a pretty girl, but be rude and nasty to a girl he wasn't attracted to her. This is normal and happens all the time its expected. If I was super beautiful I would be so powerful I'd use that to get whatever I wanted.

[Ugliness]

Women have value as human beings. Even if they don't have beauty (I've never met a woman who is not beautiful).

[ElijahCynicism]

Why must you constantly appeal to the authoritative and the societal? Try to live your own life!

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

... I do live my own life. It's just something I've noticed is all.

[ElijahCynicism]

Oh, no, I was quoting from a poem on that bit, LOL. 'And I tried to live the life of Railly, when Railly said he said to me, I dare you to try to live my life, and Railly said he said to me, try to live your own life!'

I just meant, like... The only people who hold this view are society and authority, and I see no reason to bay to their bulbous head while we are at such an age that their reign is so inconsequential, that we don't need their permission.

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

True :)

[moviedude714]

it's sad, even I feel guily for being shallow, but I guess it is because us guys are hard-wired to want women that will produce healthy babies

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

Yea I guess that's all that really matters. Who cares if she's dumber than a bag of bags? Can't cook very well, has no ambition, just mooches off of her husband. So long as she's hot and produces healthy kids.

No wonder men think we have it easy - you guys let us have it easy.

[ihatetakingcharge]

that should be an advantage for you

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

It is because that's all society wants a woman to be - but it's a disadvantage in a way too. Like for the girls who are actually more than a pretty face, it's often harder to find men who aren't intimidated by that. It sucks because it's like I have to dumb myself down or make myself look weaker in order to get a guy? But at the same time, I and a lot of other girls want to be seen for more than how we look - but it's like no one really cares unless your pretty. Wth?

[ihatetakingcharge]

because it's easier to be visually appealing to someone than it is to be verbally, socially, mentally appealing to someone

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

It sucks. I want to be just appealing. On every plain. I want a guy to see me for more than just a pretty face.

Guys have it good in that sense - you have such solid value - women are just things to boat about and show off who's got the prettiest girl / wife ultimately.

I don't understand why men have set things up this way? Don't you want a girl who has value?

[ihatetakingcharge]

if she's hot then she has value

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

Even if she takes all your money? Cheats on you with your best friend? Sleeps with numerous guys? Didn't finish high school? Is addicted to some drug? Doesn't want to do anything with her life? Is completely dependent on you?

All that matters is that she's hot?

No wonder men have so many problems dating - you guys don't care about anything else. :\

[ihatetakingcharge]

taking all the money, yes that is an issues, but if she cheats on us, as long as we got to sleep with her first then it won't be as bad, and the is dependent on me, I don't like that, but the other reasons don't matter

[oOsweet~o~nessOo]

Wow.

Men should never complain about dating then. You guys set the standards so ridiculously low.