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Home > Articles > Behavior Articles > Play To Your Strengths
NotThere
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Play To Your Strengths

 
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Posted 6 months ago Views 117 Comments 3 Category Behavior
Browsing over the questions, I see a repeated variation on the following: "What do I have to do so that the opposite gender will find me attractive?" No one can answer this question for you. Honestly, not even you can really answer this question. Plenty of books out there will tell you differently. They'll tell you to dress a certain way, act a certain way, live a certain way. And yes: some behaviors are more successful than others. Being a fun-loving extrovert will raise the likelihood of someone finding you attractive as opposed to being an embittered recluse. But getting down to specifics and how you personally can attract the opposite sex, there's no right or wrong answer beyond how you know yourself.

From here on, I'll speaking from the male perspective, but men reading this can reinterpret this advice to their own gender.

Let's start with looks: What are your best features? Where can you improve and where should you ignore? If you're 5'4", your legs probably aren't your best attribute. But maybe you have great breasts. Find a way to accentuate your strengths. Also, remember that there's plenty of room for makeovers and nothing that requires injections or surgery. Talk with stylists about re-doing your hair. Talk with cosmetic saleswomen on how to best apply your make-up. I'm sure a lot of these fall under the obvious, but my point is that there's no single area where if you're deficient, you're doomed to be single.

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This carries over into your personality. Embrace your interests and embrace who you are. Trying to redesign yourself for a faceless ideal of what men want is a recipe for misery. To all the men and women who want to know what the opposite gender wants, there's no single answer and deep down, you probably knew that. You just have to keep engaging people and putting your best self forward. If you don't click with another person, that's not because you're flawed. It's because not everyone connects and you can't force a connection. All you can do is make sure you like yourself and then allow other people to like you for those reasons.

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blufrenzy93 I agree with what you're saying. So many times, you'll see someone trying to be a different person just so the ones they like will like them back. - 6 months ago
Simply-Irresistible Very well said, and helpful : ) - 5 months ago
aceyacey "All you can do is make sure you like yourself and then allow other people to like you for those reasons" --> agree totally - 4 months ago
 
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