Why do women feel they need to rush men into something they aren't ready for?
The last time I went on a date with a woman was a few months ago.
I met her thru on-line dating we e-mailed each other for a week, and talked on the phone a few times.
We had a lot in common,and had a lot of fun when we met and when out.
Except she said it was a date, I said it was a get to know each other better. Am I wrong in starting out as friends, then move up to dating, to being a couple, than living together, from there to maybe getting married.
You are correct in moving at your own pace. We women are always thinking about our biological clocks and getting our MRS. Degree (marriage). But don't fret, move at your own pace and if she seems to be too much in a hurry then she really isn't trying to get to know YOU.
I think if women took the time to understand men and how you all operate, our relationships would be better and maybe last longer.
I found a flaw here. If 2-co-workers go out for drinks a m/f is that a date? If not than how is it any different than a m/f getting together - 2 months ago
Answerer
If the co-workers have only an agenda to be social and talk, then no, it's not a date. Believe it or not, there are male and female co-workers who can just stick to social friendships without hidden agendas.
Considering that you met her on a dating site, I don't think it was unreasonable for her to think of it as a date.
In the future, try to make this more clear. I would be extremely hurt if I met a guy I really liked on a dating site only to find out he didn't see it as dating. You are not wrong to start slowly (it's logical), but there needs to be clear communication, especially since it is a bit of a misrepresentation considering the venue you met her through.
And that was little if any help. You failed to convince me the difference. Between going out as co-workers,and just getting to know someone. Can you try and do a better job explaining it better? - 2 months ago
She said it was a date and you said it was getting to know each other. Unless I've been living under a rock I thought when two people go out with the intention of getting to know one another better it IS a date! She didn't say she was your steady girlfriend after one night did she? Maybe I'm missing something?
To answer the other part of your question- about why we rush men. I don't know. I'm not the rushing type. Maybe at your age the women you're dating hear their biological clock ticking, know what they want in a relationship and don't want to waste time with people they don't share common views, interests, etc. with. They're not getting any younger and you're no spring chicken yourself, mister ;) In all honesty though, maybe you're a little paranoid? Maybe the women you're seeing aren't in a huge rush to settle down but you're so adamant on not settling down that you sometimes read into a situation?
I think your 3-5 year plan sounds reasonable, but please don't miss out on an amazing woman just because the relationship may not be in sync with your mental time line!
Anytime you go out in a situation like that I would consider it a date, but you have to realize the definition of date is different for each person. What she considers a harmless "date" where you get to know each other you consider a Date between people who are falling in love.
The word DATE is where your getting caught up, your definitions just don't match =)
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Describe your ideal first date; Where do you go? What do you wear? How does the date end?
I love music, so we would do to a restaurant, nothing fancy, I love burgers so a burgers shop would be perfect, and then we go to a show. I love rock music so I would be jumping around and dancing. I would wear a pair of tight jeans and a cute tee shirt. My hair wouls probably be in a pony tail but I might take it down. Then the date would end by him walking my to my door and maybe a nice kiss.
Afterwards..what will your date know about you?
Afterwards he would know that I love music and I'm very loud and out going. He will know that I am an athlete and I love sports and I love football. He will know that I am not afraid to let people know what I think and want. Also I love old cars.I would a lot let him know that I am a good listener and I do everything I can to help my family and friends because they are extremely important to me.
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