A Message To All The Boys, From a Teenage Girl

A Message To All The Boys, From a Teenage Girl

Over the past few years I have come to the conclusion that no teenage boy in the history of adolescence has ever had the slightest clue as to what in the f*ck he is doing.

Now most of you can never seem to tell the difference between a young woman having interest in you or not.
So without further introduction, I give to you, young men of modern society, a guidebook of all the ways to know that I am NOT in ANY WAY interested in you.

Let’s start with the internet.
If I ignore you through text, Facebook message, Twitter, Snapchat, or any other form of social media, firstly, STOP sending me messages, and secondly, I do not like you. If I’m having a nice conversation with you and you suddenly send and/or ask me for inappropriate pictures, I do not like you. If you make inappropriate jokes about the female anatomy, I do not like you. If you upload overly friendly pictures with scantily clad girls to make me jealous, you don’t care about my feelings, and I don’t like you. If I upload a photo of myself and you write something along the lines of “smexy” or “I’d get on that”, you’re an ass, and I don’t like you. If you only ever “like” my selfies and OOTD’s (Outfit’s of The Day) and have never “liked” a single picture of my dog or post about my little brother’s soccer game, I don’t like you. If you text me that I’m cute and I respond with something like “Aw! You’re so nice!” or “You’re such a sweet friend!”, don’t get any idea’s, I’m just being nice, and I don’t like you. If I never start the conversation, I’m not playing hard to get, I simply do not like you. Just because I “liked” something you posted doesn’t mean I want to get with you, and your thinking my “like” meant something more than it did, makes me not like you. If you regularly update your Twitter feed with how many “bitchez” your hanging “wit” and how many clubs you and “the bros” hit tonight, I don’t like you. And if you have a Facebook album entitled “My Car”, I don’t like you.

Moving on. You.
If you are over sixteen and dress like a twelve year old (I.E. Underwear showing, sideways snapback, bright red Nike’s, AXE Cologne, Etc Etc), I do not like you. Now let me push this up a year. If you are over eighteen and still play video games for six hours a day, I do not like you. If you get wasted every. single. weekend. I do not like you. If you have dated all of my friends, and especially if you have dated all of them within the last year, I do not like you. If you have a “reputation” (whether it be partying, girls, or anything juvenile), I do not like you. If you stay up until six in the morning every night, with unreasonable reasons to do so, (I.E. To play Call of Duty or watch two seasons of Supernatural), I do not like you. If you are ten years older than me, I don’t like you. If you are married, I don’t like you. If you are twenty years old, work at a fast food restaurant, and have zero ambition to do anything with your life, I don’t like you. If you think Drake, Lil’ Wayne, and Machine Gun Kelly are the greatest musicians of all time, I don’t like you. If you aren’t passionate about something, literally anything, I don’t like you. I don’t care if you are a musician, an artist, an actor, or and athlete; as long as you care about something, I know you can eventually care about me to. And if you don’t love anything, how do you consider that living? Alternatively, if you are absolutely obsessed with something, (a band, a sports team, etc) to the point where it’s the only thing you can talk about, I don’t like you.

Me.

So here is a little about how I want you to treat me and how certain ways you treat me convince me to dislike you.
For starters, if I’m talking to you about something I’m really passionate about and you dismiss it with “Cool :)” or “Yeah that’s not really my thing”, I don’t like you. If I don’t ever mention my dad to you, I don’t have any intention of you ever meeting him, and I don’t like you. If you see me wearing something provocative, I am not necessarily trying to get your attention, chances are you just happened to be there on a day I wanted to feel good about myself, and I don’t like you. If I end conversations quickly and with long explanations as to why I have to go, I’m lying, and I don’t like you. Or want to talk to you. If your religion is different than mine and you make a point of trying to convince me my religion is “wrong” or “silly”, I don’t like you. If your political views are different than mine, and you make a point of trying to prove THEY are “wrong” or “silly”, I don’t like you.

Here are some things that have been bothering me personally in recent months.
If I’m at work, you show up, and I barely acknowledge your presence, don’t get mad at me, because firstly, I did not ask you to show up and I don’t have time to deal with you, I’M WORKING.
If you want to give me a compliment, do not call me “pretty” or “cute”. I have a complex about this. I don’t want to be thought of as “pretty” or “cute”. The definition of “pretty” is “less than beautiful” and the definition of “cute” is “pretty”. Go big or go home. Call me beautiful, call me gorgeous, or call me stunning. No girl wants the man of her dreams to think she is simply “pretty”.
Don’t treat me like you treat every other girl. If you treat me the same way you treated the girl you just spoke to, I’m going to think you think of me as just another girl, and I won’t like you.
And if you find out that my friend knows who you are, don’t take that as a sign that I like you, I talk about the boys who bother me just as much as the boys I like.

So there are some reasons that I don’t like you. They are few but they are important. ...Now here are some of the reasons, I like you...

If I take the time to talk to you everyday, I like you.
If you compliment me and I respond with “Aww… <3”, I like you.
If I confide in you with personal things, I like you.
If I touch my hair or straighten my shirt while talking to you, I like you.
If I purposely avoid looking you in the eyes most of the time, I like you.
If you catch me looking at you and I look away quickly, rather than smiling, I like you.
If I take interest in things you are interested in, I like you.
If my best friend “likes” everything you post, I like you.
If I want you to meet my best friend, I like you.
If I stay up hours past when I would usually go to bed, just to talk to you, I like you.
If you genuinely make an effort to care about the things I care about, I like you.
If you are ambitious and humble, I like you.
If you genuinely like me as a person and not as a pretty face or nice body, I like you.
If my family knows and likes you, I like you.

And finally, to whatever boy is reading this, no matter what type of guy you are, or what type of girls you like, just know that every girl just wants you to care about them as much as they care about you. Girls are not just something to have fun with and when we tell you we love you, we mean it.

Sincerely,

One of many.


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What Guys Said 87

  • I smell bullshit here. So much arrogance and closed mindedness

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  • Machine Gun Kelly is a muscian? I thought he was a bank robber and like dead for past seventy years

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    • WHO THE FUCK IS THIS GUY WHO CAME UP IN GOOGLE WHEN I SEARCHED MACHINE GUN KELLY. SERIOUSLY WITH ALL THAT METADATA GOOGLE YOU KNOW THAT I'M LOOKING FOR A BANK ROBBER

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    • @James-ice Yeah, I'd never heard of this guy.
      The only Machine Gun Kelly I'd ever heard of was the bank robber.

    • Yeah I was shocked when I found out some rapper rip this George Barnes nickname... not cool.

  • A message to all girls out there (including you take owner): Stop demanding if you don't plan on giving.

    All I read on this take is a girl that wants the guy to give her everything, while she gives nothing back.
    You sound like the type of girl that's a "walking flaw", but gets mad when the guys displays a small flaw.

    What you don't understand is that guys don't give a shit about you, there are thousands of girls out, all those better than you. Keep demanding more than you deserve and you'll end up along. You think you're one step ahead of guys, but in reality, guys don't give a fuck.

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    • Re-read your take, and hopefully you'll realize how you come across. Ask your mother to read it, she'll agree with what I'm saying.

    • Lmao Yeah okay xD

  • You young bucks out there should pay attention to what this smart young lady is saying.

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  • lololol this was such crap after two sentances i stopped lolol

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  • If you wear something provocative in front of a teenage boy then how are you not trying to get his attention? How would it be different from wearing something provocative in front of a teenage boy who's attention you do want to grab? Being called pretty is not a good thing according to you. Since when is it not good to be called pretty because last I checked it was a good thing. Never heard anyone say they hate being called pretty. You say pretty is less than beautiful but pretty and beautiful are synonyms so they have close enough the same meaning. you said if you treat me the same way you treated the girl you just spoke to, I’m going to think you think of me as just another girl. You make it sound as no matter how he treated her you do not wanted to be treated the same way even if if he was nice and respectful. So if your best friend like s everything he posts then you will like him. What if it was only a lot of the things and not everything he post that she likes?

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    • None of that really made any sense but I'm just going to comment on the provocative clothing part, so if I wear provocative clothing guys are just going to assume I want them right? By your opinion? So that means if I get raped it's my fault right?
      Clothes shouldn't entail what I want from a guy. Dickweed.

    • Not my fault you did not understand what I had to say. Guess you do not pay attention to what others say or if you do and do not understand them you do not ask what they mean. If you get raped it is on who ever raped you. What would you have to over a teenage boy

  • I gotta say, liking a couple selfie pics on facebook strikes me as much less stalkerish than going through her albums and feigning interest in her banalities.

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  • It's too -ve.

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  • I don't know why so many guys are getting butthurt over this, you're just saying what a lot of people think. I wish I'd read this when I was 16, I was such a douche lol.

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  • So you want us to be perfect ideal and do your biding all the time, I am telling you with that attitude you are not going to get any thing remotely known as men gender, even if you are the last woman alive in galaxy.

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  • You sound like a giant bitch and a detriment to society. You're gonna get a wake up call one of these days, and it's gonna be a tough one to take. :)

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  • Spoilt brat the only way you get away with that is because you have a viginia.

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  • To much thought into this shit! If you like/love someone, you fucking love them! Everyone is different and you can expect perfect

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  • This will completely flip flop when your looks go to shit and you can't rely on them to get you attention and things anymore.
    When your are invisible to the majority of males and start becoming desperate for the attention you were so against when it was common.
    You will discover that without a good personality, once the looks are gone, you will have nothing. People won't simply like you even when you are a total bitch. You will try desperately to get some guy to give you attention, dressing like a young girl when you shouldn't anymore, starting to approach men and having them show signs of disgust on their face, you will go online and join a dating site in desperation of finding a guy who will "like you for you", but you won't get messages from anyone but guys playing your desperate ass for some cheap tail. Eventually you will become more bitter and angry towards men that you will start joining hate groups aimed against males in an attempt to cause them as much hurt as possible. Eventually spending your later years alone with cats, desperate, frigid, and angry.
    This is common for females like yourself.
    But hey you got a couple years left before that happens so enjoy them while they last.

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  • Damn, get this girl some water. Someone is salty. I stopped reading after the first paragraph.

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  • Well Thats like errr your opinion man. the way you wrote is like most the guys out there. You can't expect to find the best guy just by walking through the door. This whole world is experience.

    also you stated your a teen so your still young and haven't experienced how others have. A Message To All The Boys. so does this mean all guys are bad then?

    If you want people to respect you, you should first off respect other people first. If you treat every guy like trash no guys will treat you with respect.

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  • Well, after reding the first two fucking sentences I can confidently tell you that you're a brat who thinks she's entitled to everything and that everybody (not only guys) hates you too. If you think you're going to get people to change by being mean to them, you're a bully. That's all you are.
    I should feel sorry for you, but I don't.

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  • Are you like autistic or something?

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  • Lol you seem like an awful person.

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  • well this is just common sense
    i feel like people on here have no life skills
    /rant

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What Girls Said 33

  • hmm. ok.
    while i can understand the views u have here, i think their presentation has come off the wrong way, as u can tell by the responses. i was interested to read some of those before answering, and unfortunately you've been slammed, so i do feel bad for u on that.

    on the other hand, we must remember that love is a 2 way street dear. i can't expect Mr Perfect at my door. men have flaws, and so do i. i must learn to coexist with those flaws. if i expect something in a relationship, i need to be ready to give all that back. I'm pretty sure you'd know what you're doing if u have a partner, but i think considering the realities of human nature is helpful. i can see why u wouldn't like guys who do this and that and so on, but we need to be reasonable here. there must be a whole list of things guys don't like about us either.

    for both men and women in general... when we notice flaws in the other gender, we need to leave it up to our judgement to be able to filter what flaws we can and can't deal with. should i take all the shit that comes my way? absolutely not! i don't have to! but my guy is gonna make mistakes, he's gonna do things i don't like. i won't be able to stand him sometimes... but ill love him anyway. THIS is love.

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  • My daughter! !!!

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  • I've come to the conclusion, there's not much you do like about a guy. Which, may in the future as you get older become problematic. I counted and there's 33 things that will make you not like a guy and only 14 things that will make you like a guy. I know you're young but, looking at those numbers does that seem reasonable to you?

    Look, I won't pretend men can't be frustrating because they can but just because someone is frustrating doesn't mean they are not worth while. I agree, that a girl wants to be cared about by the guy she cares about but who's say he doesn't care about her even if he did do those things on your list?

    And, I'm not sure about other girls but being told I'm cute or pretty doesn't bother me. In fact I know person who use to call me pretty girl and I found it endearing. Also, I'm no walking Webster's dictionary but from what I understand to some people pretty and beautiful are kind of in the same realm, so it's not a bad thing.

    Let me ask you a question, if in 5 or 10 years you come back to read what you wrote on here, do you still think everything you wrote will be considered reasonable to you or do you think once you grow older and see how things really are that maybe you'll see this article from a different perspective? What do you think?

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    • Basically from what I understand you are telling me to lower my expectations, correct?
      Now I want you to imagine you have a daughter. Would you tell your daughter to lower her expectations? Or would you want her to have high expectations? To expect a man to treat her beautifully and be a good, kind hearted, ambitious person?
      Yes, in ten years I will look back and want my little girl to only have the best of a man in her life, even if looking for one makes her seem unreasonable, because I'll believe that her and every other little girl deserves the perfect man for her.

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    • I'm not basing my life on your take and I don't believe how I live my life is the right way or the wrong way, it's just how I live my life. And, I don't have it all figured out and I never said I did. I have many self improvements to make and things to work through, I even said in my comment that I'm not perfect. So, I'm not sure where you are getting any of this. I never said everybody would agree but I'm just saying that just because someone doesn't seem ambitious to you doesn't mean they are not. We all have dreams and goals, some are very ambitious taking the corporate world by storm and others simple like working on there parents farm. Not everybody wants the same things in life and being a teenager you can't judge a teenage boy on his fast food job and playing games, that's actually how it should be because you're teenagers. The whole point of growing up is to have fun and get a crappy job to learn responsibility. You're not suppose to have it all figured out yet, nobody does.

    • hey mytakeowner --------- @loveisbeautiful is saying your standards are not realistic.

  • "If you stay up until six in the morning every night, with unreasonable reasons to do so, (I. E. To play Call of Duty or watch two seasons of Supernatural), I do not like you."

    excuse you that is a good reason to be up at two in the morning supernatural is an awesome show.

    Don’t treat me like you treat every other girl. If you treat me the same way you treated the girl you just spoke to, I’m going to think you think of me as just another girl, and I won’t like you.

    so if he is nice to all girls, you won't like him?

    and you are being unrealistic when i first saw the guy i am interested in right now, i thought he was a jock who only thinks of himself. He always dresses like an athlete and always has a hat that he wears backwards. (he was a soccer player in high school and still likes to work out) But when he started a conversation with me i decided to give him a chance. As we talked i noticed how incredibly smart he is and how easily he can make me laugh. And he is a harry potter fan thats the best part.

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    • 1) I disagree. If you are a 20 year old man with a job and responsibilities, this shouldn't really be a lifestyle, should it?

      2) "I won't like him" means I won't like him in a romantic way. I will think he's a nice guy, but I won't think he likes me in a more-than-friends way, therefore making me not like him that way either.

      3) Did I not say being an athlete, musician, or anything in between is commendable? Did I not say a passion for sports or anything else is good? I'm failing to see your final point.

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    • Do you think your own lifestyle choices reflect the perfect way of living? Are you saying your way of living is 100% the best way to do so?

      Again, like I responded to a previous commenter before; The line about "liking the post about my little brothers soccer came" is not meant to be taken in the literal sense but in the way of me wanting him to care about my life rather than just my face and body.
      The statement about how a person dresses and presents themselves is only one part of the Take. It is the accumulation of all things, personality, dress, and other things that make the man. One could overlook a style they typically wouldn't find attractive (a dumb jock look in your scenario) if the guy was as genuine as I was stating he would be better off being.

    • 1. Is it the best way to live life? Probably not. Do I care? No. When you are in college you will understand.
      2. Sure let's go with that.

  • While some of what you mentioned is totally understandable (such as a difference in religion or political beliefs), other things you mentioned here are VERY trivial and hardly worth "not liking" someone for (such as, "if you only 'like' my selfies and never pictures of my dog" part). I also think it's very silly to say "don't call me pretty, call me beautiful!" However, that's all your prerogative I suppose.

    There's nothing at all wrong with knowing what you want and having high standards as long as you realize that sometimes super high standards and expectations at some point can become unrealistic and could result in you being single for quite some time. But anyway, best of luck to you.

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    • I respect your opinion and would just like to clarify that the "liking pictures of my dog" was not literally meaning to like pictures of my dog. It's to note that I'd like him to care about my life rather than just my face.

    • Okay, and of course that is understandable.

  • Don’t treat me like you treat every other girl. If you treat me the same way you treated the girl you just spoke to, I’m going to think you think of me as just another girl, and I won’t like you.
    YASSS!! ALL THE WAY!

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    • <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

  • A bit rude lol

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  • JESUS CHRIST and I thought I disliked a lot of people. Many of things you've listed that make you not like a guy are just immature and unreasonable. Have fun being single forever or stuck with a boring suck-up.

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  • too much negativity on this post. i stopped reading after the thousand time you said 'i don't like you' lmao

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  • I agree with some of your points, but I simply cannot live (not a hyperbole) without late night video game sessions and staying up late at night to watch a couple of anime episodes. 🌚
    And I did read the entire myTake. It was entertaining, really. I'm sorry you're getting so much hate for sharing your opinion. You should be able to have freedom of speech without getting judged so harshly.
    Although, I must say, some of your points are close to misandry to be honest.

    (And axe cologne smells terrible! 😂)

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  • I don't agree with saying I don't like. We all go through that shit I'm 14. So what I don't give a damn and if I swear at people so. I say I don't like someone I have a reason. This is utter Bullshit.
    from what I've heard. This sounds pathetic and I feel sorry for you *Sarcasm* I don't think every guy is going to agree with your opinions so keep it to yourself. I don't care so shut up.

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  • Hahahahha I love this take! so spot on.

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  • I hate the guy says, "I'm into music." Have not being into physics or math. A guy into music is into nothing

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    • I'm sorry you don't have a creative side of your brain. A world without art or music is not a world worth living in. I believe in an all around education. Considering you can't even construct a single proper sentence, I'd venture a guess that you're not winning any awards based on the other side of your brain either. Have fun with that.

  • Well, I think its safe to say that men don't like you either. Have a wonderful life and I wish you the best of luck with not liking anyone.

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  • From this ones take... its best if you write your own world and go live in it. Kindly, Anonymous

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  • Why did I just read the entire thing?

    I agree with some points, like the guys with reputations (I won't like them in a romantic way).

    But other than those few things, I find this take only an opinion of SOME, definitely not many.

    I find it incredibly rude to criticize others' lives. They're telling you how you should not judge people so quickly. People have to start off small, you can't get a degree and BAM! you're the owner of a restaurant.

    What if they don't have enough money to go to college (Like my family) or their parents are sick or disabled? You have to earn money.

    Understand that some of your points are silly. There, I said it. I'll be waiting for that
    "I don't like you".

    NOT yours sincerely,
    Arisa

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  • It was good until I got to the video game and tv show part. This is obviously you're personal preference though (I thought this would be a helpful guide), but many men and women watch tv series for hours on end or play video games especially teenagers it's not a big deal and I personally prefer it so I can understand guys who would rather watch tv or play video games all day.

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  • 'One of many'

    No, you're on your own, love.

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  • If you always have such high standards then you'll never get a boyfriend. Everyone has flaws and you need to understand that no one is perfect.

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  • Well, that's your opinion. Maybe I would like to stay up late with a guy watching two seasons of Supernatural and a big bowl of popcorn!

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