Dating And Guys

Dating and guys I have never cared about what you wear to our first date, or second, or third for that matter. As long and its not pajamas and its your style and I don't care.

I'm much more interested in reading your body language to see if you like me. Yes fellas, a date with me is all about ME.

I'm thinking about me and I hope you're thinking about me.

I'm filled with anxiety throughout the entire date, I'm thinking more should I get a burger or a house salad?

Not, ew. He wore THOSE shoes with THAT shirt?!

I'm thinking about how close I can get to him without him thinking I'm weird.

Not, MY GOD the plain t-shirt and jeans look was soooo last year!

In fact my favorite part about being a girlfriend is buying you clothes that I like, so your fashion sense is irrelevant to me.

The best judge to a first date is how you make ME feel. If I'm feeling okay when I'm with you then I'm happy even regardless of what you're wearing. And if all goes well, you won't be wearing it very long anyway!


Join the discussion



What Guys Said 10

  • I like this take (and the last picture too :P). I sometimes get more focused on how she sees me, I mean my looks, than how I make her feel or what she thinks of me as a person, and I think that's what causing me problems to find a girl.

    Good take ;)

    • Thank you :) I think a lot of us forget to focus on the other person

  • Self absorbed much?

  • The guy in the photo kind of looks like me lol!

  • After reading your clarification on other posts, I find this to be a very helpful and informative take.

    It's not saying a woman wants you to focus on her in a date. It's saying that she's so focused on herself that she's hardly paying attention to what you're wearing or that awkward thing you just did.

    The faster you can make a woman comfortable by taking the attention and focus off her the better. Remember, I'm talking about first or second dates.

    That's why guys with a sense of humor get women. They can cut the tension and make her comfortable. Just make sure you don't use your humor to create a barrier.

    When a woman plans and anticipates a first or second date, they shift all of their focus to themselves. Guys do it too. They try to figure out how to do everything right to make it go smoothly.

    You have more control over what you do on a date than what another person does, so that's where the focus goes.

    Now this is for your typical girl. There are diva types that are highly gregarious and will judge you on a first date, never focusing on themselves.

  • Attention whores gonna Attention whore. If everything is about you then this relationship will never last.

  • What is your opinion on the role and responsibilities of girls during dates?

    ●Do they need to wear alluring clothes?
    ●Do they need to paint their face?
    ●Do they need to test the boy?
    ●Don't they need to step forward?
    ●Don't they need to get worried about boy's emotions?

    You know what, it's VERY EASY for us guys to show you that how we care for you (in spurious way to make your last line fulfilled)
    If WE are not feeling that she is worried about losing us, our own real value and worth or if our efforts are being reciprocated or not. You'd end up being used because relationships won't work in self-centered way.

  • With that kind of attitude, you may end up having either a lot of failed dates (serious guys) or fails down the line (the ones with "bad intentions")
    In my opinion, if a date seems one-sided... it already shows what the possible relationship after may be like. On a first or second date, one puts their best foot forward, if you best foot screams "its all about me!!" well, good luck. It doesn't matter if you are the most generous person on earth, if you act that selfish on the first date, a second may not come along. A date is to get to know one ANOTHER.. not to get to know You only. You don't come off as selfish to me but not everyone can read between lines.

  • No. You're basically setting up gender expectations with this take. Guys are not supposed to worry about themselves on the date, but it's ok for a girl to be self-conscious on the date? This is like saying that guys are supposed to do the asking out and that girls are supposed to be dropping all the hints.

    • I understand what you're saying, but what I am trying to say is what you're worried about really isn't as important. A lot of my post was satire, not completely serious. I'm trying to say that we're so worried too that we're not focusing on what you're worried about. I'm sure the exact same post could be written from a guys point of view as well

  • Nice take. However I have observed that many girls are kinnda shallow in their judgements. I mean I consciously try to ignore my own first impressions since I know those to be of low accuracy and little value and it has served me well in life. Basically my number 1 problem in dating is that noone seems to be willing to spend a little time finding out what the person is really all about.

    • I think that's definitely a point in today's version of dating. With additions like tinder and bumble we're expected to be interested in someone in three seconds which is really hindering our generations ability to form relationships

  • Remember guys : It only her interest level that matter, not yours.


What Girls Said 2

  • "I'm much more interested in reading your body language to see if you like me. Yes fellas, a date with me is all about ME."

    "I'm thinking about me and I hope you're thinking about me."

    u actually think like this on dates? kinda self centred if u ask me. it's meant to give AND take, not just taking what u can and having the night revolve around u.

  • Self-centeredness breeds inhibition and introversion. It's ok to be self aware, but I hope you get that how you think is NOT good. Only when you relax and focus on the person in front of you with genuine human interest can you actually build rapport and figure out if you want him at all. Same goes for him.

    Shyness and inhibition can even be endearing, or even a challenge to some guys in small doses, but push it too far, even if it's just the first date, and it becomes a chore.