Guys, is sleeping on the second date a sign of not a serious relationship?

I met this guy from Tinder and on our first date we both got drunk and kissed, a lot. After that he kept texting how he couldn't wait to see me again. On the second date which was supposed to happen on a Wednesday - at his place which he cancelled and then on Saturday which he cancelled again. We finally met at his place on Sunday, we cuddled, had sex, watched movies and I stayed over. He texted me the next morning and we have been in touch. I am not sure where this is headed, is it even right to bring up the topic of - where are we headed so soon? Is sleeping on the second date not a good sign? He hasn't said - can't wait to see you/lets meet after that. Nor has he made any plans for the weekend yet.


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8

Most Helpful Guy

  • hmmm normally I would say that was a mistake, especially on tinder, but he sounds interested. I would for sure not ask where things are going, usually that is best left off until a month of steady dating or 4-5 dates, which ever comes first. At this moment, you have to just assume he is at least free to still be seeing other women as well.

    I would try and set up a date where sex won't be happening and see how he acts, maybe a night out or something but try to keep it to activities like bowling so no moves can be made, and make it so he knows no moves can be made before hand. His reaction should tell you a lot of his motivations...

    I will say not all people on tinder are bad or just looking for hookups like many other will say, I met my current girlfriend on there and it has been going just fine for 8 months now. We didn't become exclusive or talk about us for like 2 months, so even though we both assumed the other could still be tindering and dating others, it turns out we both stopped seeing other people by our third date

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What Guys Said 7

  • Sleeping on the second date is okay. It does leave you vulnerable though if he is just have sex. I'd also be more worried about the cancelling dates than sleeping together on a second date.

    Having said that it's only a new thing. Try not to get too attached and just enjoy it for what it is right now. If you want to meet up again message him and tell him how much you enjoyed that night and you should do it again. If he keeps agreeing to meet and it's been a few dates then you have the right to ask him if he is exclusive. If you go in too hot and want him to be exclauive now he may run off scared.

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  • A guy will sleep with you on the first date, or sooner, if given the chance. What does it mean? It depends on the guy and time will tell, but do not equate a guy having sex with you on the second date with his thinking you are something extra special. That MIGHT be, but that is rarely the case.

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  • I've slept with girls on the first meeting... sometimes it's ment one time.. sometimes it's ment relationships for 4+ months... sometimes it's ment just having sex for a while with no feelings attached.. depends on the guy and what you want to try and make it of course

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  • It's tinder... When he cancels he going out with a easy peace and using you as backup. I am pretty sure what is going on. Sorry.

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  • At your age, to be honest it happens rather quick.. Either it works or doesn't, but it usually does just happen

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  • I'd question it a bit.

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  • It's irrelevant, frankly. If you have sex with a guy and he's still talking to you afterwards, you're in good shape.

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