There's an attraction theory that says if a man is pulling away, you have to remain firm and not go after him (he kind of stopped answering your texts, calls, and kind-of drifts) because he needs time to sort through his feelings and he'll be back when he's ready. If you try to interrupt this, he'll pull away more. If you let him go and have his "me" time, he'll bounce right back, wanting to get closer to you.
I let a guy go that told me he wasn't ready for anything and that I was pushing him (he initiated and text me every day), he didn't want to hurt me because he wasn't over his ex and couldn't get her image out of his head.
The reason being, he stopped talking after not replying to my message in response to his initiating text. I know for a fact he told his ex goodbye the next day and said he was moving on. I didn't hear from him for a week and a half. He comes back saying he thinks he's ready to start dating again. Things got heavy after I refused to take his bait to ask him to dinner (he's super shy) and then asked him to my place, which prompted him to blow me off by saying he fell asleep because of being exhausted by final's week. Before he told me that, I told him he had hurt me for the last time by blowing me off again. He said he was sorry and would be sure to not bother me anymore. I later told him it was okay, as I understood because he's going through a lot. I then text him saying I hopes he was having a good night, trying to forget his bailing and move on.
Now...he's gone again. Leaving him alone worked last time. He came back thinking he was ready to date. Maybe he's going to come back with a date proposal? The dating thing shocked me...the week of no contact really did something to him, but he just couldn't pull it off in the end.
I never thought it was true, but I think it is.
Most Helpful Guy
" If you let him go and have his "me" time, he'll bounce right back, wanting to get closer to you."
Yup. I don't always hear it referred to as the rubber band theory. But it's definitely true.
I don't know if it's going to be true in your case though, because you didn't just let him go and bounce back. You may have basically told him to go away and not bother coming back.1
- Show AllShow Less