The experts are right... treat a women like crap and she'll love you more!

OK first of all... this girl posted the above statement in her "details" and it threw me for whirl!

This is what’s wrong with Women these days (certainly not me!) They strive to feel even the smallest amount of affection from the male chauvinistic pigs that treat them like crap, & call them men/boyfriends/husbands… what have you… When they FINALLY get the attention or affection their “men” have been lacking to show… women indulge themselves in their own little world thinking their relationship will really work and that “these men” are actually coming around when from the start these “men” should have been showing that kind of affection/attention. I don’t think women realize that men are men and they are how they will always be… men don’t change… YOU can’t change them… if they are an ass to you from the beginning then they will forever be an ass… I mean OK if they are sarcastic then fine but there is a line between being an ass to be funny and get and keep your attention or being an ass for no reason… if they start to belittle you in the smallest ways… I PROMISE it will get worse… whether he beats you with words or uses his hands… its will eventually get there…. why women insist on allowing men to treat them like nothing, using and abusing them dumbfounds me… People NEVER stop learning so if you “teach” a GUY he can treat you like crap and keep you in arms reach he will continue to do it.. DUH! Nip it the butt! If he doesn’t like it he can split… The Nice guy always finishes last YES but the above is why… I don’t understand why women don’t go more for the good guy vs the mean one… don’t they see when you get a good one he treats you like the queen of his world not the scum the earth? Don’t they know what it’s like to be truly loved? What do they blame it on? I’ve heard people learn what love is from growing up… um.. maybe… but does that mean if you grew up with hugs and kisses that you will do the same to your kids or that if you grew up seeing your father beat your mother or vice versa that you will do the same? Um… no… you LET people treat you the way they treat you… and love the way you wanna love…

What are your thoughts… and no I’m not a scorned female by any means… just tired of women allowing themselves to be treated this way and then look for sympathy.


Most Helpful Guy

  • My thoughts?

    My thoughts are represented in this graph I drew a second ago.


    (In economics, the marginal utility ((in this case, I called it usefulness)) of a good or service is -the utility gained (or lost) from an increase (or decrease) in the consumption of that good or service-. )

    Apparently girls seem to have a motivational drive for gaining a guy's attention they find interesting. They'll do whatever the hell and everything, and centralize their thoughts, becoming obsessed with the guy and getting to their goal. This is indicated by the first dotted line - by giving only a slight of attention, she'll be happier to have it than if you gave her lots. And you must go over this limit sometimes to keep her interested.

    It's a damn messed up mindgame, really. But it has to be played, or you will lose. -.-

    The second dotted line shows the end of the friend zone, by the way. If you show more attention than she wants, then she'll feel threatened or forced, and will attempt to avoid you completely. Hence the giant fall in marginal utility.

    This is my current theory anyways - and also that many girls seem to believe that the frustration that motivates them to get the guy's attention and affection is LOVE itself! Therefore, the moment the guy shows any affection, she has reached her goal, and she "loses her feelings".

    Yeah, people are basically that stupid. It's ridiculous.

    • Ok, I have to say I love you for applying an economic principle to this, as I am an economics student. For me the friend zone doesn't exist. Give me too much attention though, and I'm thinking you want to fit me with a GPS locator or you just want in my pants. The last paragraph - sounds like you're dealing with some emotionally immature women. People don't "lose feelings," like their brain has a hole in it. That is stupid, indeed.

    • Thanks :) I love economics' representation of the motive behind human actions - a constant evaluation for NPV at each given situation and maximalizing value... It makes perfect sense.

      Truly, the friend zone seems to exist in case the girl is either not initially attracted or if you have some sort of unacceptable flaw that basically "turns her off", or just gets uninterested. It's strange, really.

      There are girls out there, many, who "lose their feelings", say "the flame is gone, I'm leaving".

What Guys Said 17

  • I believe the statement, "THE EXPERTS ARE RIGHT... TREAT A WOMEN LIKE CRAP AND SHE'LL LOVE YOU MORE"comes from the girls' expectation of a "hot guy"(who are generally assholes) being nice and caring.

    Everyone's idealistic view of a relationship partner is that they should be beautiful with an amazing personality. This is the reason why some of the girls are attracted to hot guys, because they want to prove to themselves that these attractive men are "different" from the assholes they've met before.

    Some girls don't learn; when a guy treats her bad, they break up. And then they get back together, in hopes that they've changed something about himself. And then he breaks her heart again. Then get back together...and so on. It's a vicious cycle, and every time they get back together, it heightens their expectations.

    So I don't think the girl actually believes being treated like crap will allow her to love him more...but rather, when a guy treats her like crap, her expectations about the guy is heightened every time the guy gets back with her.

  • LOL@ "nip it in the butt!"

    I don't think girls are particularly fond of being abused. I just think that nothing turns them off faster in a guy than the appearance of weakness or neediness or insecurity. And yes, that includes even being a jackass for most women. But at the end of the day, all the emotionally stable ones will prefer a strong guy who's also a good guy over an abuser.

  • Because woman are apparently natural born masochists...

    • LMFAO... I guess that's true for some!

  • nip it int he butt! XD. it's bud :p. And yea but what the theory is is that nice guys are boring. You get cool nice guys too though, but they get a girlfriend and don't go crying waaahh nice guys always finish last because we're nice no other reasonnn.

  • I'm sick of women like this, and I no longer have sympathy for them. After all, it's their fault for putting up with it. What's funny is lots of these girls treat good guys like sh*t. If you don't want to be with someone, tell them with class. Recently, I befriended a girl who seemed really nice, but she turned out to be a liar. She's now with this guy who has obvious anger issues. Ya see, that's why most girls don't like "nice" guys because they are just as fake as "nice" girls. They play the part until they get what they want. If they don't succeed, their true colors splash out and they give you hell. Women need a good man who will be kind and loving but firm if she's out of line. Of course, I've seen them leave if I stood up for myself. That's why I could care less about being with someone now. Damned if I'm a doormat, damned if I'm a d***...

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What Girls Said 8

  • PFFFFTTTT! ABSOLUTELY NOT IN MY CASE! treat me like crap and I'll kick the guy to the curb...not got enough time to be dealing with that nonsense.

  • Sadly,i agree with what you're saying.I read so many questions on here where women are sticking with these knuckleheads who are verbally abusive,or cheating,or beating them,ignoring them etc. And all I'm thinking is..."Are you that desperate to actually tolerate all of that?" I can't believe the non sense...seriously. But you know what? Some people go through it...and they do learn from dealing with the crappy guys. I've dealt with them before,and damn it..alot of nonsense I have tolerated WILL NEVER happen again.I respect myself too much to allow some dude to treat me anything less than how I should be treated. And because of this realization within myself,ive been attracting a whole new breed of a guy...the good ones.I wonder why a lot of women just can't seem to get a bloody clue.

    • Good for you! Esp. since you're eyes had been open to just how special you are and how you DESERVE to be treated...

  • I agree with you that most women love it but personally if a guy treats me like crap I get offended and stay away from him. It's a HUUUUUUGE turnoff! I like nice, funny, sweet, guys with huge expressive personalities. Not "cool" badass guys. And if you blow me off and treat me with disrespect it's ugly in my book. So guys don't believe that nice guys finish last. It's not true. If you want a real woman and not some lapdog then treat women with the utmost respect. Nice guys are the guys that get married one day while guys who put on a front will never find happiness. Trust me. :)

    • Aww, cute profile picture :D

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    • Show All
    • They're awesome as puppies and as adults.

    • totally true :) personally my favorite dogs are golden retrievers but I also love aussies :)

  • I think it's full of shit! I think it's guys fantasy of being some kind of Casanova Playboy asshole -he can play a cool man without being an idiot. I'd love to have a man who treats me nice and is adventurous and exciting not boring -so send me more exciting but I guaranteed you can be a good person and the exciting to because I am!! The reason I found this question was I googled: "can and man love a woman enough not to treat her like shit?" That is my question. Maybe in the beginning he can be nice during the interested phase but then after being together for a while, the guy turns into a motherfucker. I'm not sure I want to man ever then- who needs that kind of disappointment?

  • girls like that get on my nerves but what can you do. hoes gone be hoes. if you don't respect yourself no one else will but everyone wasn't taught better.

    i will say that a lot of these "nice guys" are either manipulative, or passive aggressive jerks, or spineless men. that's not attractive. it isn't as simple as "stop going for the ed hardy douchebag bad boys and find a nice guy" um no. people always point fingers at how messed up girls are but fail to mention that guys are equally messed up. if girls grew up in dysfunctional households, thus don't know how to be in romantic relationships then what can we say about their brothers? guys are just as bad and there aren't too many genuinely good men to choose from anyway. even the "nice guys" are f***ed up because most of them are only nice because they have an agenda.

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