Why are girls so hard to talk to?

I feel like girls in general try and make it hard for guys to talk to them. I just want to know because I always want to talk to girls but then when I see one I like I start worrying and don't talk to her because I am afraid she will not like me.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Seriously I wish I knew, it's like we have to have perfect social skills in order for a girl to be receptive to us, even if we are just being ourselves, that does not always work. Girls can use almost any opening line to break the ice and start a conversation with a guy, us guys have to come up with something creative, original. In reality, it is much more difficult for a man to meet a woman than it is for a woman to meet a man, women are able to approach men and are also able to wait to be asked out. Men can not wait and rely on women to approach and ask for the date because men WILL NEVER BE ASKED OUT, or at least very rarely, because I've heard in some cases the gender roles are reversed, but still it is very rare. Men have to do everything in order to get anything with a Woman, sadly. When a man gets rejected he has to shrug it off and his friends would tell him to “be a man”. On the other hand, if a woman gets rejected, she would most likely take it as a personal insult on her inner child and her friends will comfort her. I'm not saying I would cry after being rejected or emotionally traumatized, like I wouldn't go to my friends so they could cheer me up, because I am not that childish. A woman is automatically accepted by society as a woman; whereas men have to prove themselves at every turn. A shy woman WILL get asked out without having to over come it. Men have to work more on themselves than women do. Men must have confidence, real self confidence, that is not based solely on how they look, but rather understanding and acknowledging their self worth in order to approach. Building up this type of confidence takes time and understanding. See all the work us Men have to do? It is unfair, but at least we don't have to deal with pregnancy and childbirth, but nowadays with the birth control pill or abortions, it seems that women are sometimes able to avoid even that.


    • Whats interesting is that women don't have to put even half the effort compared to men and they have every possible advantage in the singles life, or in dating and relationships, and yet they still believe that they have it harder.

What Girls Said 4

  • You have it backwards - girls aren't hard to talk to, you just have a hard time talking to girls. You need to stop focusing on what you think might happen and allow the moment to just happen. You're creating an unreal scenario in your head and quitting before you even begin. How is that going to accomplish anything? Women are just as nervous as you are talking to someone they don't know. They are also worried about what you think about them - worried about being rejected. Everything you feel is something they could be feeling as well. Talking to them only bothers you because you let it bother you.

    Everyone faces rejection at some point in their lives. It's something you have to learn to deal with. Try not to take it too personally, because most of the time it's not personal. They could be rejecting you because they just got out of a bad relationship, they are having troubles at home, they are already in love, ad nauseum. The point is it has nothing to do with you and what type of person you are. But if you can't take a risk because of fear - you're taking the risk of never having a relationship. Which would be worse for you?

    Good luck.

    • NO.. More girls than guys ARE hard to talk to. Guys are much direct and straight forward with their answers.

  • Have you tried to talk to them after you see them?

    • No, I am afraid she won't like or that she will laugh at me. I always can think of many things that can go wrong. I know I am lacking confidence and all but I just can't bring myself to say anything. It is hard to say a simple hi to anyone.

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    • Why would you cry if you are rejected? Say she is like "Fuck off, you bastard, you son of a b****. You guys are all the same. Hitting on me? How dare you, go f**** a w**** or something. Leave me alone you s**** on the face of earth." Then who is turning out to be bad? It's her, isn't it? You just asked someone to spend some time with you while you asked them out, right? But she couldn't handle it and abused you verbally and now she is the abuser. You have nothing to loose. Be more confident.

    • I would cry because I just want to feel like someone likes me and right now I don't.

  • you need to stop seeing every girl you talk to as a potential girlfriend. we are all just like you, we just happen to have vaginas haha. yes, there are some bitches out there that will make you feel like shit, but for the most part girls are easy going.

    have you ever thought that maybe its hard to talk to them because they are thinking "oh god I hope I don't say something stupid to make this guy not like me"

    you really just need to bite the bullet and get in there and talk to some girls. what's the worst thing that could happen? she could be a bitch. then obviously you wouldn't want to be with a girl like that anyway, so that's not a big loss

    • I've tried that with some girls.. But it's just not working.. or at least not anymore. So now I'm moving on.

    • How the heck is he suppose to not see every girl as a potential girlfriend. I mean it's something guy's do don't they. I mean I can't afford to be picky, and maybe he can't

    • Well I'm just saying it would be easier to talk to a girl if the pressure was off. you can decide if you like them after you get to know them

  • Well Don't talk about sex or anything like that. Even though you may think it is funny that doesn't matter us girlz don't always think that sex jokes or talking 'bout it is funny. Just be yourself and first ask normal question like 'Hey how's it going?'

    • Asking boring questions like "hows it going" leads to the girl getting bored faster than you can say rejection

What Guys Said 7

  • They're easy to talk to if you met them through a neutral source like a friend or at work or something similar.

    They're a pain to try to talk to if you two are complete strangers.

  • While I agree there are some girls who are extremely conceited most of the girls are girls are surprisingly nice, at least in face to face conversation. In fact most girls are so nice in nature that they hesitate a long time whether to make their point clear or not. hahaha. Just talk to any girl tomorrow. Out of 10 around 7 would be really nice to you. Most would not like you for sure but would not be like "Who the hell are you?" But beware some would do that. hahaha.

  • I agree... I hate it when girls just completely ignore a dude or go around the bush!Where or not you like us.. Just please tell us how you feel, and don't play silly mind games..

    I'd rather have a girl tell me straight up that she doesn't like me... Then lead me on, or not give me an answer. It's just so frustrating.

  • Yea, there are some women that think their vagina makes them a rockstar. Tell 'em it don't next time their a bitch to ya.

  • Girls are not hard to talk with that being said the one thing guys do the most is think about it to much
    Guy: wow i should go over there and talk to that girl...
    - she probably got a boyfriend looking like that...
    -what if she reject me...
    -ill just do it another time she look busy...
    -what would i say if i went over there...

    You can avoid all this by going over there as soon as you see her this will help you be fresh and original because its not rehearsed.

  • If you ask a girl to do something and in your mind you think Ill ask her as friends then your not getting rejected she is just being lazy with a friendship. And then later on ask her out. But your right women like critisizing guys. Look at how many women critisize questions guys ask on this site. Its like a lot. Its like there constantly annoyed at everything we say or do. It sucks.