Facial Scar

[Anonymous]

To make a long story short:

I have a scar on my forehead which I got when I was a very small child due to an injury. Of course, with the years it got stretched and looked more and more subtle, however it is still visible and people keep asking me about it.

The thing is, I used to be very self conscious about it and I have always thought girls would get turned off and uninterested in me the moment they recognize it (apparently it isn't obvious as I thought it is).

Now, I read a few articles that actually indicate that those kind of scars (it doesn't look like a burn or anything... it just looks like a slightly reddish bumpy line on my forehead) can be attractive because they indicate risk-taking and adventurousness. So I am really confused on what kind of first impression I make with a scar like that.

Sometimes girls ask me about it as if they're fascinated to know the story behind it, and they actually go ahead and touch it - "how'd you get that?".

What do you think? guys and girls alike

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

i used to have what looked like a gash across my cheek a few years back. I didn't have it for very long but I found people thought I looked scary...er, all because of it. I have always been the type of guy who people thought was intimidating to be around. People see me and so many are scared off by the way I look. Some people say it's because of how bold I am but whatever, the point is I've always been intimidating. When I had this gash across my cheek it took a while to heal fully, and so many people were kinda scared by me.

I guess it all depends on how good looking you are already. If you're a handsome guy with a scar across your face, you'll probably look like some kind of badass. If you're some wealthy or influential asshole, a scar can be humanizing to some, if they saw you as powerful before. If you're big and scary looking, or huge and ugly like I am, then people might start assuming you're some kind of monster. Part of this is because people seem to judge everybody on appearances. It sucks but that's how it is.

There are sadly too many people who see somebody at a glance and immediately assume they know all they need to know. Which is why I have to try so hard to prove to people that I'm not the mindless thug people take me for at first glance. I guess that's life.

In any case I'm pretty sure you'll do fine. You seem to have women interested, and it gives them something to talk about when they see you, so I guess that's not a bad thing, and I'm guessing since they're not too afraid to approach you, then I guess you're clearly not that bad looking. You're not ugly like I am or tough and scary looking like Mickey Rourke ( link link link ), now are you? No? So I think you can relax. I think you'll be fine. Just be cool about it, don't worry about it, maybe even have a sense of humour about it, and you'll see.

Good luck with this one man.

[Asker]

It's just that I've grown self-conscious of it during my childhood and it's a feeling that's hard to shake off. I myself don't think the scar is bad looking - in fact, I think it's quite interesting looking... but there's absolutely no way for me to know if a new girl who meets me sees it in a "eww creepy/scary" way or "hmm, how'd he get that" way.

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

Well in the mean time you have what is basically a conversation piece. You may not be able to tell how she sees you immediately, not unless she was upfront about it, though I find people can telegraph how they feel from their actions or the look on their face. You should try to be observant of that crap.

Whatever the case, if a girl can't get past a stupid thing like a facial scar, then you are better off without her. Just move on and look for more girls. Someone who treats you right.

[bBop345]

It's not a big deal if you have a scar when you're a male. It shows toughness because you've been through something very traumatizing and survived. Doesn't Seal have loads of acne scars on his cheeks? Now he's married to Heidi Klum. I have a scar on my lower lip from a dog bite 13 years ago. I had to get 17 stitches. Now it's white and only noticeable if you come really close to my face. Anyway, all I'm trying to say is that you're not the only person in the world with a scar on your face.

[Asker]

Heh, I got my scar also from a dog - but I was so young that I don't even remember it. In fact, I am not traumatized... I love dogs.

[bBop345]

I'm afraid of most dogs. ha!

[Somethingstrange]

I don't think it's a big deal having a scar. It's cool, and as someone else said it's a nice conversation starter. If it's uncomfortable you can just joke it away and say that you're the real Harry Potter or something.

I have also a scar between my breasts. It's a long and very very white line which I got from our stupid scratching cat when I was 4 years old and wanted to carry it like a baby. -.-

[Asker]

Heh... people actually were calling me Harry Potter (it looks very similar to his)

[melissarose8585]

There will always be someone who just sees the flaws-remember that.

But scars aren't anything to worry about, and yes, some people do find them interesting. I wouldn't think it will really affect your dating, either. I have three on my face-one across my nose and two smaller ones by my eye. No one has ever said anything negative, just asked what they are from.

[Asker]

I've seen scars on girls which looked interesting and sometimes even arousing - like the girl has risk taking traits and is more than just an immature princess. But I dunno... maybe I judge myself harshly or I've just got used to thinking it's so horrible - I wish I could think otherwise.

[Ugrace]

I think it's nice to ask about such stuff. You can immediately show interest and sometimes the story is funny. I do like to hear the stories behind a scar as long as it doesn't get too gross. And a scar is also somehow "exclusive". Not like it would be easy to see someone else with the same scar on the same place etc.

[Asker]

The story behind it isn't gross or anything... I was attacked by a canine who pushed me and I fell on my head and got injured. The story is ridiculous sounding which makes it even more confusing for me personally.

[Ugrace]

The fact that the person wants to share the story is important. Even if it sounds ridiculous to you, it doesn't matter.

[Anonymous]

It's a good conversation starter, nothing to worry about