My girlfriend has a serious attitude problem, how do I deal with her?

[Anonymous]

I mean she fights all the time about the smallest things. I cannot joke with her or else she will get mad at me. When she is stressed out or something doesn't go her way she explotes and starts bitching at everybody. She always think she is right even when she is wrong.

She also has had a lot of issues with people at work because of this and other places as well. I tolerate her because I love her, but some other people won't or don't, which can bring her a lot of issues.

She is not always like this obviously; sometimes she can be cute, really funny, a great person and she can be a great friend as well. Just as she has as many friends, she has as many enemies as well, which personally I don't think it is right.

How do I let her know that she needs to change this behavior ?

[cherrychoco]

Take her to therapy? No, seriously. If you really love her and are interested in making your relationship work, which it sounds like you are, going to a relationship counselor could very well be the best thing you ever do for the two of you. A good therapist should help you breakdown and completely understand the dynamics of your relationship, as well as help your girlfriend work through her personal issues. Good luck! Remember, you can only lead a horse to water...

[tiffybaby]

This sounds like a mixture of my boyfriend and younger brother, haha. Honestly, just tell her how you feel about it all, but really try to do it in a way that doesn't seem like you are attacking her personality and such. She sounds like she just needs to mature a little.

PS: I like how you told us good things about her too, it was really sweet even if she never sees it.

[SparklingFirefly]

She has emotional problems. My mother is like this, and really they don't ever stop. I think you need to encourage her to get help or be honest with her and explain things to her in a loving way. She needs to know she can't just treat people any which way she wants.

[theerik009]

(I study psychology at the University of Edinburgh)

Sounds to me she has anger problems. This might be caused by either a depression, or emotional tiredness. Try to find out what the source is of her getting so angry (Might be a disorder as well, like an autistic disorder). Talk to her about it, let her know you're there for her.

If you need any help, I'm here!

[Asker]

thanks? :) Just a question you study psychology and you are 16?

[Asker]

i meant thanks*

[theerik009]

Yeah. This is my first year. I left school early because it was all too easy.

[Asker]

ohh nice. Yeah I would really like to know why she acts like this. I think she just needs more love. I notice that when I am nice and cute with her she reciprocates with me.

[Asker]

to me*. Sometimes I wonder if she has had a rought childhood or teenage years.

[theerik009]

That's what I am thinking. I have someone at my work who will literally attack anyone who insults him or gets mad with him. I later found out that he has PDD-NOS and he has been abused his whole life...

[MyNameIsJonas]

You have to talk to her about it. Basically she is being immature.

[Asker]

do I tell her this?

[MyNameIsJonas]

Yes.

[BAMSTR]

Just tried this and she just yells at me what do i do

[kheserthorpe]

There's no reason for you to sacrifice your life for a girlfriend like this. You want to stay friends with her, fine, but you don't need to have your main relationship partner be someone immature and selfish.

[t1572]

She sounds like my sister was, if you tell someone they need to change most will get resentful . If you keep accepting her behavior she will continue ,tell her how it makes you feel when she does this. The world doesn't revolve around her, ask her to picture being the other person how would she feel . She may get away with it for now it gets old quick , it's emotional immaturity

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend is like this too. He took an ssri for anxiety for a while and he was tolerable. Now, he's back off it again and putting me down all the time, as well as getting upset at the slightest inconvenience.

[Asker]

is ssri an antidepressant?

[theerik009]

SSRI stands for serotonin-specific reuptake inhibito, which are typically used for depression. You could say that they're antidepressants yes.

[Opinion Owner]

Just so you know, though, I think he's dumping me very soon because I can't do anything to please him. He just builds and builds his resentment toward me every day about everything from my haircut to the way I folded the towels. I don't know if its worth being with someone who enjoys rage and anger and domination over others. I'm miserable.

[zinclozenges]

It sounds like you should dump him, Lady. You said it yourself -- you're miserable. GET OUT.

[IzzyDB]

Try not to be nasty about it. I can get quite whiney and annoyed quickly so my boyfriend pointed it out to me, joking around, and it made me feel bad about it and also really unlady-like. Now I have stopped whining and shouting at him and we both seem much happier. It's up to you but that's what we did :)

[wanderer83]

haha the girls are giving you good advice and us guys are being smart asses about it

[Anonymous]

Kick her ass...n show who is the boss

[Lux17]

link

[Opinion Owner]

Not physically but in a literal way...following the constitution of the country...stone for stone

[Hamburgers]

Put her on a leash or replace her

[wanderer83]

Give her a xanax