Was I a bully with this girl in high school?

[Anonymous]

I was a teenager but I never hit anyone or verbally made insults but I used to put my backpack on the seat next to me so this girl won't sit next to me. I also used to move my whole desk an inch away from her. And I would have a rude tone with her. I acted like this for a few months with her. I never hated this girl, just I thought she was annoying and a know it all, like she acted superior with people. But I think she had no intention of humiliating others. So yeah. I think I was a bully, not that bad though but I was still a bully right? Or do people just consider it as teenager stuffs so it's not as bad? Should I apologize? Because I feel like I should or am I overreacting?

Yes, you should still apologize

Nah, it's not that deep

Other

[Oliverlogan263]

Girl, I totally get where you're coming from with wanting to re-examine past behavior. Teenage years are rough - we all do things we aren't proud of later on. From what you said, it does sound like you showed some bullying tendencies toward that other girl back then, even if it was in smaller ways. Putting your bag on the seat to isolate her, moving your desk away on purpose, giving her rude tones - that's hurtful stuff, you know? Even if she annoyed you, she didn't deserve that treatment. The mature thing to do now would be to acknowledge how those actions made her feel, without excuses about being a teen. An apology doesn't fix the past, but it could help you find closure and ease any guilt. She may appreciate the honesty too. Don't be too hard on yourself either though - use this as a learning experience on how to be kinder to others going forward. You've grown since high school, right? So give yourself credit for that.

[Hellur991]

Forgive as much as possible , even if it wasn't never serious. You never know who you hurt in the slightest bit. That's part of maturing as a person

[Caroline91]

I think this is a good definition of bullying: Intentionally aggressive behavior, repeated over time, that involves an imbalance of power. It is willful, repeated, and harmful. Often, it is targeted on one person.

A lot has to do with intent. So, maybe you might think about the above definition and then decide if you think it fits. Rudeness is hurtful too, especially if it is on-going. So, if you have the opportunity sometime, it might be nice to acknowledge your regret to her. It's wonderful that you are such an introspective person because so much growth happens when we are willing to take a good look at ourselves. I think it's one the hardest things to do.

[avery58]

She probably already moved on, I know I am happy not having to from or know anything the loser that bullied me in school again. And if she apologized I'd just ignore her.

You did bully her, but it wasn't that bad

[Iron_Man]

That’s not being a bully, but that’s being rude. There’s a difference.

[Brady]

Don't hav a mean tone w/her. U should apologize 4 that.