So I posted a picture on instagram today my caption being "the songs on the radio are okay, but my taste in music is your face." My crush comments this
I dont know what he means. Like he asked me out to the movies yesterday, is he referencing that? Or is he saying that I like good in my photo? Or maybe its something else I don't know.
Whats your opinion?
he's referencing the movie date
he's saying you look attractive
Other (please explain)
Select gender and age to cast your vote:
Please select your age
Guy commented this on my picture, what did he mean?
That's a strange response... I mean given the context. If he said sent you a DM asking if it involved his face or something along those lines then yeah. But him saying "let's go..." I don't know that seems weird. But hey I could be wrong, maybe he likes you but is too shy to straight up ask you out
0
48 Reply
Asker
+1 y
Exactly, I was really stumped when he said this. I wasn't sure if he meant it as a "YESSSS slay👏👏" type of response or something.
Weve got a weird relationship. In summary, weve both admitted we like each other. Im his #1 person to him. His friend mentioned how all his past relationships ended terribly and now he's really scared of being with me in risk of losing me. So I don't know what he could mean when he says that
The instagram comment? Nope, we already said goodnight and then he commented on my post. but if you meant before he told me about the whole "cant date you" situation, yes he's still been talking to me lots and he's been even more caring than usual
Hmmm then he could just like you as a person but not as a potential girl to date. But I kinda understand where he is coming from where his past relationships have made him scared to jump into another, I'm kind of the same way. BUT that shouldn't discourage anyone to have any more commitments... that being said just keep talking to him and my advice is to be flirty with him. But don't throw yourself onto him
Well he's been inviting me to places more often (for example alone at the movies) and he's been messaging me first just to ask about my day. He'd even feel bad and apologise if we didn't have a long conversation one day. Like there's certain signs I noticed when he first liked me. He'd comment on my photos, text me often, ask me to hangout a lot, and speak slightly different (ex. "Well hello there" or "sorry sorry sorry" instead of hey or just plain sorry.) he's picking up on those tendencies again so Im getting a feeling he still likes me and is still just scared of risking losing me he wouldn't be scared, but apparently Im the mostimportant person in his life rn
The guy likes you, but as his friend said. He is scared due to past relationships, i'd say get to know his deepest fears when it comes to relationships... like ask him what he has gone through but without him sparring any details about the girl or girls. Just to briefly go over what he wants to avoid from now on, you know? That way you have an idea of what he is looking for. But that should not mean you change who you are as a person in order to be with him. It simply just gives you the bigger picture and if your frame doesn't fit... well then maybe life has something better for you
This is really good advice! I never thought of that. Ill ask him about that so I know what to avoid. All I know is one heated on him, another dropped him after a week and I don't know about others or the details. Hopefully it does work out. I don't think I can imagine a day without him. Honestly, I tried cutting him off for a month when we fought. Worst experience of both of our lives. I think that could be another reason why he's scared, he doesn't want that to happen again
Look I'm not a young guy but I'm not an old bastard either 😂 that being said I have built up some wisdom in many categories in life and I have a good amount of knowledge when it comes to dating. That being said every relationship is like a song
Ever notice how when you discover a new song that you like you play it OVER AND OVER again? And do you notice that eventually, the song begins to wear on you and you stop pressing the repeat button?
Well it's the same concept with a relationship, you find someone new and you're hooked (for awhile) but see here is the interesting part. It's the amazing people you meet in your life that stick around. And to put this into perspective... it's like the songs you never really grow tired of but you play them once ina while and they still make you tap your feet or bop your head
But yeah... I've been cheated on and left by a girl. And that one relationship really changed me. Now I take my time to get to know the girl, so I have a feeling he is trying to do the same thing with you. He is taking his time to get to know you ona deeper level. But I would suggest you ask him in detail what he expects ina relationship, that way you can lay down what you expect as well. It's honestly a mature adult thing to do. Most young couples just fly in blind without knowing the "ground rules" of what their significant other wants. And then they stumble upon them during the commitment (and mainly ina bad way) and this tends to spark arguments and heart breaks
Im sorry someone did that to you, its honestly such a terrible thing someone could do. I can't imagine how hard it was. weve been connecting a lot lately. We asked each other to wrote a paragraph about random things weve never mentioned about us. He went on and i learned cute things like how he lives puzzles or he constantly changes his clothes bc he feels uncomfortable after a while and he learned i wear opposite socks when i go on stage and sing and I have 100% faith in fortune cookies. Then a few days ago he learned that I like to color so we both spent until 1am coloring so we could show the other our progress. Weve just been learning quirky and unique things about each other and its been bringing us closer everyday.
Ill ask him, hopefully it works out. All i know is he said he's in a relationship with someone because he wants to build grow and learn with them, not for anything sexual. he's in it bc he sees something beautiful. And he's omly into he cliche relationship stuff like
I was devastated at first but there's no need to go into details but honestly at the end It's actually for the best. I learned a lot about myself and what to expect in a good healthy relationship so there's always a positive to a negative. But one thing I do hold to believe to be true is that the longer you devote time/money/feelings for someone... the harder it is to let go. But this guy must have learned at a much earlier time than what I did. So just don't put too much pressure on him, be the best most loving girl you could be and he'll come around. Just remember what he went through... no damage is unfixable. But all damage takes time and care to fix
Thats a great way to think, always take positive out of every situation. And definitely, I can relate. I never really fall for anyone, but when I do I fall hard because i devote all my time and energy towards them. I've been trying to stay super supportive. He was upset all last week because he lost his best friend so I messaged him everyday to check up on him. Even when he didn't want to talk, I completely understood. He apologised and said he had to do it on his own. I told him he didn't have to apologise because everyone needs to have space at times. He felt bad for being so dry and not talking all week but I reassured him and he was so grateful and thankful. Apparently Im the only person who's been there for him 100% even when he gets depressed. I can't help but be there for him, I honestly love him. Ill keep it up and hopefully he realizes Im here to stay
I don't know how long you two have been talking for but I would say as of right now give him 2-3 months time to make a move. If he doesn't take things to the next level with you then I would just say it's not gonna evolve more than just a friendship. But yes keep doing what you're doing, a sweet generous and supportive girl is a plus in my book and I'm sure I'm not the only man that thinks that. However I'm sure you already got it under control but just in case... don't smother him. Because he could see that as you being clingy and men typically are not a fan of a girl like that.
Well lets hope it goes well then! Thats a good guideline, i don't wanna be waiting years for nothing. I think he really appreciates that Im here for him, but hopefully he sees that as a quality in a girl he wants to be with. So far it seems to be well, whenever I don't initiate conversation he is the one to. I've never asked him to hangout outside of school but he's asked me on multiple occasions even within the past two weeks. Ill try to keep it balanced 😜 thank you again for all your help!! Honestly I really needed it. This is some of the best advice I've ever gotten on this site.
Hey! So I know you're great at giving advice so I wanted to know of you could help. I ran into a guy i used to have a thing with today even though he lives an hour away. Turns out he's moving back to my city and maybe even my school. We talked for a long time. So when my crush asked how my day was going, I told him about it. He said "a thing?" "Who" "explainnn" so I told him he might be moving here. All he said was "Oh..." and started being dry. I talked about it a bit more and all he said was "cool I guess." By the way he got so curious then kind of down right afterwards makes me feel he's kind of jealous. Tbh now he knows how I felt when he tried talking to another girl to get over me almost. But what should I do? Should I reassure him that Im here for only him, or do I wait and let him realize just because he said he wants to stay friends doesn't mean Im gonna be single forever?
Well in case you aren't sure, I'll fill you in. I can tell the guy you told me of did not like what he heard... it's tough to hear it but it's true. People never want to hear the person they like tell them of another person in their life. EVEN if the person is no longer a part of their life but once was. So honestly... I feel like you blew it with the guy you told me about, well maybe. Usually if the genders where swapped in this case then it would be a forsure since girls close up much better than guys do. So if you decide to choose the guy you told me of in the first place he might still embrace you with open arms. Just make sure whatever you do, you make the right decision and STICK TO IT. If you don't then that will make you the female equivalent of a fuck boy
Honestly, i don't know what to think now. He is my first choice. I wouldn't start talking to the other guy unless the first one didn't want a relationship
I asked him if he still had feelings for me because he used to and he said he doesn't know for sure. He now told me he still likes this other girl but she's dating someone now. And like now I have to give up on him because Im not his first choice. I love him so I've been super upset but man come on I was his number one and now look. I never have trusted him fully because he's leaving me a down a few times. I love him and Im heartbroken but maybe itll get better.
Ok look I will have to give you some tough love here and say you kinda made your own bed, when you told him about some guy you where talking to that you once had a thing with in the past could be moving back and you where excited for that. He was super curious to hear what you where all happy about (like a puppy wagging it's tail) and when you told him... he immediately went like this 😕😞 for him it was a total drag. Put yourself in his shoes, but I also have to add and side with you here that hey... let's face it this guy has put you down as well. So he can't really act the way he is given that he has disappointed you as well you know?
Just do your thing, focus on what makes you happy 😊 don't put all your eggs in one basket, if you know what I mean. Start getting to know other guys and who knows you might just find a guy that will make you think you where blind for thinking this current guy was perfect for you
Today we were supposed to spend lunch singing in the music room at school but he asked instead for the two of us to go to tim Horton's. We walked in the snow for fifteen minutes to and from Tim's and just talked about anything and everything. We got to connect a lot and it wasn't awkward at all. Then tonight I texted him id talk to him tomorrow bc he seemed tired and he said "sure. But first of all. How was lunch?" And he was kind talking to me a lot in the halls at school and tapping my shoulder after lunch. So I kind of think Im either still digging my own grave and he just wants to befriends and Im thinking too mmuch into it or maybe we have a shot still.
Ill try to get over him in the meantime in case it doesn't work out. I started talking to the guy I ran into and he definitely is flirting and interested. I've known that guy forever so I feel if it doesn't work out with the first guy, maybe its gods way of saying I deserve more.
Yeah by the looks of things he could very well have you in the friendzone. Because keep in mind friends do still care about each other, and yes there still most likely is that element of attraction to you but he definitely has his gaurd up. He doesn't wanna end up getting all over you and then he finds out you leave him for another guy or cheat on him. NOT SAYING THAT YOU WOULD DO THAT, but it's the harsh truth given that you two where starting to bond very well and then all he hears is you being happy to run into a guy you has a thing with and found out he was moving back in town and he kind of distanced himself. I know this because I would do the same thing. Especially after my last serious relationship that transformed me into a different type of guy that when seeing something that raises a red flag I take some steps back and see how the chips fall.
I get that, but again remember he was talking to another girl to get over me at the time so I thought he wouldn't mind. Tbh i was sure he was already over me. But by the way he said oh I think he did somewhat care.
He knows I wouldn't heat on him, he knows I've never even dated anyone because I wanna make the relationship mean something and choose the right person. I think he knows me well enough to know Id never leave.
Yeah that's very true, he reminds me of a old friend of mine that was very sexist and was a very selfish person... so I understand the point you're making. But I have been guilty of this action but basically what he was doing was setting up options. He didn't really cut things off with you fully and sort of left you hanging there, then went after another girl (had his fun with her) then came back to you. I call this the hero effect because when he comes back to the girl he left hanging she see's him as a knight in shinning armor or a hero if you will. When guys do this to girls it turns them into hopeless romantics because they leave them with so many unanswered questions.
If you still like this guy then keep talking to him and flirt with him BUT DO NOT talk about any other guys to him. And if he begins reciprocating flirtatious vibes back at you then at that point you know you still have a chance with him
The thing if he is doing it this it isn't intentionally. We've been super close for months now and he even told me when he said we should just stay friends that "there was no intention in my body to ever hurt you. This is the only way I know we will last." Ill keep talking to him. He does want me in his life most definitely. But he just doesn't want to be with me. I dont wanna get my hopes up anymore you know. Im just going be friends with him and see where that goes.
Exactly, and good idea! Just keep talking to him and stay in touch with him. And if both of you drift apart from each other... well everything happens for a reason 🙂
Yea Im just trying to be friends with him and who knows if it builds into a relationship, i hope it does. He invited me out to lunch again and we walked without anyone else. He kept asking me questions about my life ie. What did your sister do to annoy you over the course of the weekend? Haha.
He called me randomly out of the blue for the first time at 8pm tonight. He was being sarcastic, witty, flirty and just really funny. He kept laughing at my jokes and playing along with my banter. He started playing piano and showed me a few of his song ideas for it. Then he turned on some music. He played a lot of Taylor Swift because he knows I love her music. He was singing to me in the phone it was so cute. We were on the phone for literally an hour before he said he's gotta shower and get to bed. He wished me goodnight and then I snapped him to have a good sleep. We snapped back and forth a bit but he was the last to snap back.
I think he's getting to like me again. Or maybe this is just a friend thing still. Ill just keep trying to be his friend for now.
by the way Im sorry I keep writing so much, you're getting MHO for sure. I just feel you give me the best straight forward advice and I have to thank you so much for that
Ok when I was a young guy, like when I was even 18 I acted that way with a girl I liked. So yeah I think you definitely have a shot 😊 like I said just keep doing what you're doing. But one thing us guys do think is this... if a girl talks to us and goes out of her way to talk to us. She likes us, catch my drift? (Even to this day I use that principle all the time) girls ignore guys they don't like. And this guy see's that you clearly are into him since you are willing to talk to him on the phone and I'm sure you two are at the very least each others top 3 friends on snap. So just keep it up, he'll come around.
Im glad I still have a shot. Im gonna keep doing what Im doing and just talking to him more alone in person and on the phone and if he decides he wants to take this further I wouldn't disagree haha 😊 yea we snap all the time. He got his phone taken away on the weekend and I messaged him on snapshot. The minute he got his phone he replied to me because we messaged back and forth and he said "yea I got my phone back literally three minutes ago" so it was sweet he decide to message me first of all things. And dont worry, I've never kissed a guy in the first place so I couldn't bring that up. Ill make sure not to bring up any guy, especially the one I ran into at the mall. we're really connecting lately, I hope it works out somehow
Ahhh the days when I was a little shit and found ways to message girls when I was little 😈😂😂 but yes good idea. Just keep the connection alive and healthy and flirt on the daily. But wait when you say you had a thing with another guy you mean you two where just flirting?
Haha 😂😂😂and yea definitely! I tlak to him everyday now and I feel comfortable enough to flirt with him or tease him now. And yes all I was doing was just talking with a guy, it was the type of thing where its like you're flirting and it could've been a relationship. He knew that too dont worry haha he knows I've never even kissed a guy
Yea trust me, I've never even dated a guy because I've been waiting for someone I would last with. I've always wanted my first boyfriend to be someone I cared about a lot, not just chose because he was cute randomly.
This guy has kissed a girl but nothing else besides that. he's the type that is like chivalrous and helps girls out because his aunt always told him he has to work for a girl if she needs help and stuff. he's only into cliche relationship stuff too like kissing and cuddling and hand holding stuff which Im glad about. I'll try my best to stay safe. Right now I just hope I can get him to be mine eventually
You gotta communicate with him. Explain to him what you want and what you expect. It'll be nerve racking, but it's better to lay it out on the table. This will eliminate any ambiguity and you'll both know where each other stands.
Well we are both musical and weve written songs for each other before. I wrote one based on our present situation and I was thinking of singing it to him and then just kind of explaining that I still like him.
The story is, he really likes me but he's scared. He was talking to his friend about how much he likes me and his friend said our relationship could end just as bad as all of his past ones (he doesn't talk to any of them now.) He said im his number one person, and he doesn't want to even risk the chance of losing me because Im all he really cares about. So now I don't know whats gonna happen
He's allowing his past dictate the present. If he continues to have that mentality, he will never put forth his full effort into you even though he says that he really cares about you.
You need to communicate with him and tell him that you're in it for the long run. You want to be supportive regardless of what choices he ends up making... eventually he'll open.
This is extremely good advice, thank you. I just hope his choice is to be with me. He doesn't seem over me (keeps inviting me places, messages me first, asks about my day and puts effort in.) And I've purposely never dated anyone in my life because I have been waiting for someone I wanted to last with. I think that guy is him.
It seems that he really wants to commit, but his emotional are still very vulnerable due to his last.
He honestly wants confirmation that he can fully give you his trust... he doesn't want to have another broken heart.
Just continue to support him. Show him and tell him that you care... And when that day does come of when he is fully be open to you, it'll be the most amazing feeling in the world...
I felt he was that way too. I mean, he's acting like he's really into me still, but in a cute caring way never sexual. I think he's considering dating me because he hasn't really been into anyone other than me since that. But he's really scared of losing me like he said. Ill try to support him and tell him that. Hopefully he comes around.
He totally likes you, and I assume by saying "let's go" he probably means he likes your pic, and he wants to go on the date, so he's probably saying "let's go (out!)"
0
3 Reply
Asker
+1 y
We have had a bumpy road. he's been my close friend do months now. Im his #1 in his life. We both admitted we liked each other and wanted to try to work it out. Then his friend scared him by saying if we dated there's a chance it'd end terribly like all his past relationships. He said the only way he can make sure I stay in his life and he doesn't lose me is if we stay friends.
By today I mentioned to him I ran into a guy I had a thing with at the mall and we talked for a long time. All of a sudden he replies "a thing?" "Who" "explainnnn" When i explained how i used to talk to this guy but he moved and how he plans on moving back to our city and even our school, he went dry. He just said "oh..." and when i mentioned the guy more hejust dryly replies "cool I guess." I think he still likes me and as much as he doesn't wanna lose me he doesn't want me with anyone else
Then do t let it be awkward. This is something I don't understand about people. It becomes because you make it so. If you stop trying to figure it out and take it all by face value, its a lot easier.
Believe me, I know because this is what I do. But ya, just ask and try not to worry about such trivial things, ok? It'd be better for both of you that way.
We have a weird story. We both know we both like each other, weve admitted it. But a couple weeks ago he said he didn't think he could be anything more than friends with me. He really wanted it to work out... but his friend made him think. He told him "you should stop liking her. If you guys both date it could go bad like all your past relationships and then you'd lose her. If you care as much as you say you do, Id just stay friends." He said since Im his #1 person in his life he's really afraid he would lose me and the only way not to risk that is by staying friends.
I wrote a song about it saying that I still don't understand but if he ever changes his mind Im right here. I wanted to sing it to him (we are both musically inclined and write and sing for each other all the time as well as write letters.) Then Id explain it to him and ask what he thinks. Is that a good idea?
Most Helpful Opinions