Biblically Speaking, Men Are Supposed to Serve Their Wives

Biblically Speaking, Men Are Supposed to Serve Their Wives

Yes, it is men who are technically designated in the Bible to be the leaders and “rulers”. But that sort of leadership and rulership doesn't mean that women should serve men. To the contrary:

Matthew 20:25-28 “The rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their superiors exercise authority over them. It shall not be this way among you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first among you must be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.


Eph 5:25,28-29 “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church.”

Men are supposed to love, nourish, and cherish their wives like Christ loved, nourished, and cherished the church. That’s a lot of responsibility. Because how did Christ exhibit His love to the Church? Christ expressed His love by becoming a servant to them (see Matt 20:28) and sacrificing everything:


2 Corinthians 8:9 "For you know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that though He was rich, yet for your sakes He became poor, so that you through His poverty might become rich."
Even his own life. (See, again, Eph 5:25)

The Bible also states that men should submit to their wives just like women should submit to their husbands. (Eph 5:21) So, yeah. Biblically speaking, men are supposed to serve their wives.


More info: https://bible.org/seriespage/22-submission-christian-husband-ephesians-521-32

http://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/staying-married/husbands/what-should-be-the-husbands-role-in-marriage


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What Guys Said 49

  • I believe that the message from God is that we should not place ourselves before our spouses and that we should love them just as God loves us. However, Ephesians 22-24 is very clear:

    22 Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

    Husbands should be the head of the family but they should use their position of leadership to serve the family and not to make the family serve them.

    You are trying to put some feminazi spin on the Bible and make it sound like everyone else has it wrong; fortunately, you are here to set us straight. No sale! Why do you have that need? Are you unhappy in a relationship? Angry?

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    • Didn't you get the meme men are women slaves

      "Of course guys are slaves to us! Everyone knows. Even with sex, the woman directs or allows him to do anything. And she can take it all away whenever. Women have ultimate control!"

      www.girlsaskguys.com/.../a27751-men-really-are-just-women-s-slaves

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    • The Bible says that men should submit to women too though. Ephesians 5:21 Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

    • Yes, it doe, but that does negate verse 23:

      23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior.

  • The Bible is more of a guide on how to live. Granted antiquated like certain parts of the laws that are created.

    Ephesians 6:2 "Honour thy father and mother; (which is the first commandment with promise"

    Now tell me how many of you worship your parents wishes at adulthood? only if you are clueless you will.

    Thou Shall Not Kill...
    Criminals on death row...

    And who are those who follow the Bible's every words, those who lack the ability to make decisions on their own. Does the Bible tell you what shirt to wear? what color socks?

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  • I think you missed a part there.

    Ephesians 5:22-28

    Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

    Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing[b] her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

    As for women. They need to be taught to love.

    "Older women, likewise, are to be reverent in their behavior, not slanderers or addicted to much wine, but teachers of good. 4In this way they can train the young women to love their husbands and children, "

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    • Eph 5:21 "Submit to ONE ANOTHER out of reverence for Christ."

    • no wonder Islam is on the rise LOL

    • @Tammuz360 I would rethink that.

      Quran - 4:3 "3. And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphan-girls, then marry women of your choice, two or three, or four."

  • Yep, everything you say is correct. And I have no problem with that at all.

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  • Or how about we all just do what suits us best?

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    • 3mo

      Because when people go by their own selfish desires rather than God's will, it only leads to a life of foolish pointlessness and confusion.

      God knows infinitely more than all of the minds of the earth combined. Trusting in Him and doing life His way is one of the wisest things any human being can do. Don't be deceived and enslaved by the desires of your flesh, because all your flesh wants to do is wreak havoc and die. Don't be conformed to the world, but be transformed through the renewal of your mind, so that you'll be able to know all the awesomely good things God wants for your life!

      God bless you, man; and seek to know our savior Jesus Christ!

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    • 3mo

      @Sitnikoff so you accept it as the word of God just because it says it is?

    • 3mo

      @Sitnikoff "Here's not my word, but the Word of God"

      Nope. You can't prove that.

  • 3mo

    Ha

    Ha

    They're using the Bible now

    I laugh

    I can't even blame the Bible on this one, you've selected only specific passages, takin shit outta context and all

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  • 3mo

    dat's gr8 if ur religiousss

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  • 3mo

    Finally, a post on here that's moreover my kind of style! Keep up the good work.

    Just make sure you emphasize the mutuality of service between a husband and a wife, just in case anybody here might get the wrong idea. Also, for the same reason, make sure you do your best to include the context of any passage you use. For example, try not to overlook the passage right before the one you used from Ephesians.

    "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit fin everything to their husbands."
    -Ephesians 5:22-24 (ESV)

    In Ephesians Chapter 5, Paul was instructing the church in Ephesus on how to live as believers in Christ, emphasizing the importance of being "imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God." (Eph. 5:1&2)

    So that's how we ought to be not just in our marriages, but in every walk of life, and every kind of relationship (Husband and wife, children and parents, bondservant and master, etc.)!

    God bless you, and keep studying God's Word!

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  • 3mo

    Both should serve each other.

    Also popular : neither is supposed
    To sexually deny the other.

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  • You're cherry picking. Most of the bible says a woman is a man's property. Are you illiterate or just joking?

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    • Maybe the old testament but I don't think in the New

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    • 3mo

      @John_Doesnt Now it appears that you're starting to talk to yourself. It doesn't matter what you say, my point still stands.

    • 3mo

      @Sitnikoff your point is that a book written over 1700 years ago is a scientific reference. Which is just ludicrous. It's a book of stories and fairy tales. Even the majority of modern Xtians will admit that it's just anecdotal stories and not meant to be taken literally.

  • Blows my mind that so many people go by what the bible says. It's just a book like any other in reality.

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  • We are also not suppose to eat shell fish. There is a reason the bible is BS. You can pick your verses to make your point.

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  • The Bible also says wives should breastfeed their husbands.

    Proverbs 5:18-19

    "Let your fountain be blessed, and rejoice in the wife of your youth, a lovely deer, a graceful doe. Let her breasts fill you at all times with delight; be intoxicated always in her love."

    I mean hey, I'm game if you are. All depends on what kind of commitments you're willing to make, right?

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    • lol, it doesn't say that all. What you said is out of context. It means to be joyous of your wifes body, and to be intoxicated by her beautiful form. This happens to just put an emphasis on her breasts, but nice try. :P Some men might be able to convince their wives into doing such a fetish.

    • @krash2002 I know, don't worry I was messing around. My point was that how one might interpret the Bible is completely different to how someone else might, which is why it works better as a tool to apply to your own life, rather than one to apply to others as this girl is doing here.

      I think the only commonly agreed thing on Christianity should be that it needs to do a better job defending itself from the barbarian hordes that are outside our gates, currently.

    • Gotcha, sorry about that then. SO many people misinterpret the Bible, or only use partial phrases to poke fun at it. Which is wrong for any religious piece of scripture.

      I'm liberal, and still remain a strong Christian. Which in this day in age seems to be Taboo. I don't know why people spend so much time trying to disprove Jesus's teachings vs trying to understand it or at least come to terms with what he wanted for us.

  • As a male atheist, I say let women do whatever they want. She has every right to her body and fuck those who say that they should be subservient.

    Even though I never had a girlfriend in my entire life, I still choose to be honorable and don't want to force women to do anything.

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    • 3mo

      The OP is talking about marriage, which is a biblically rooted concept and completely different than being single. Marriage, in the biblical sense, is a covenant between a man, a woman made before God for the purpose of becoming one flesh in every aspect of life, becoming one single body reflecting the glorious image of God all across the universe.

      To say that a husband and a wife should have a right to not submit to the other is like saying your heart should be able to not submit to your brain whenever it wants (or vice versa). The problem about that is if your heart refuses to submit to your brain, the whole body dies. That's why it's so important for a husband and a wife to serve and submit to one another; otherwise, the relationship ultimately dies and becomes pointless and chaotic.

      I hope this brings to you a better understanding of what the OP is trying to say. God bless you!

  • Wives are commanded to submit to their husbands, not husbands submit to their wives. You can't have two heads or two leaders in the family. The husband is the head. Submit to one another is referring to God's order of submission: Jesus submits to God the Father, the church submits to Christ, wives submit to their husbands, children submit to their parents, and the public submit to the governing authorities. Nowhere are husbands commanded to submit their wives. It's just you trying to bring in your feminist agenda. Sorry, not falling for it.

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    • I didn't say that men have to SUBMIT to their wives (although, yes, the Bible does say in Eph 5:21 for men to submit to their wives), but that men have to SERVE their wives.

      YES, men are supposed to be the leaders.

      But that doesn't mean that women have to serve men. To the contrary:

      Matthew 20:25-28 “The rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their superiors exercise authority over them. It shall not be this way among you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first among you must be your slave— just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many.”

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    • If it's a feminist agenda to have husbands submit to their wives, what's the agenda named, to have wives submit to their husbands?

    • @Azara There's no agenda. It's God's order, just as husbands are commanded to love and honor their wives and be willing to die for them. Since women have been given the power in marriages, the family unit has crumbled. Women were never meant to have power because they're not emotionally capable of using it in the right way. When fathers and husbands had more authority, the family unit was very strong. Now that women have more authority, the family unit has fallen apart.

  • biblically speaking im going to burn in hell for falling in love with a man. i will not and refuse to worship a god that won't let me be who i want to be or love who i want to love.

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    • 3mo

      Biblically speaking, what you're really talking about is lust, not love. If you really loved the men you say you love, you wouldn't have homosexual relations with them in the first place; because God is love, and God does not sin.

      "Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love." -1 John 4:8

      And mark my words; I'm telling you this not to try to judge or condemn you, but because I love you as a brother and it's my duty to help reason with you.

      "You shall not hate your brother in your heart, but you shall reason frankly with your neighbor, lest you incur sin because of him." -Leviticus 19:17

      I hope the best for you, so you may know the truth of God!

  • Wonder what bible you are reading exactly, the one i read as a kid said no such thing. the highest it went up to was mutual respect.

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  • Bible also said people like Abraham, Jacob, and David had multiple wives...

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  • You just want a man to take care of you. I hope you don't ever find a man to be your slave.

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  • you quote the bible seriously? you take the Bible as foundation for ANYTHING?
    media.giphy.com/media/OvL3qHSMO6uaI/giphy.gif

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What Girls Said 23

  • you have selected the few verses applying to us, not even bothering to provide those which tell us to submit to our husbands also, and what this is supposed to mean. if you are going to explain something like this, you need to include as many perspectives as possible, because when some smartass comes along and shows you a different verse, you have the answer.

    i really dislike when people take verses out of context. no wonder so many atheists think everything we believe is bullshit.

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  • In a Muslim's Quaran, Men are Supposed to Serve Their... Parents First. Wives come Second.
    This put Sort of a Sour Ball in my Mouth, Which is Why, too, Our relationship as Husband and Wife, Went.. South.
    Among other things with me Not Returning to Egypt to live with him, This didn't help, neither.
    Good luck and Great work. xx

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    • Sorry to hear that. Hopefully you can either work things out, or find a spouse who treats you as you honestly, fair, and is concerned about your emotions as well.

    • @krash2002 Thank you so much. We are not together right now, I have not gone back, things became too Whack for me with his overbearing family and him putting them before me.. I feel I was treated unfairly, although they had love for me. xx

  • 3mo

    Makes sense, but as always, we're still going to be the lesser counterpart. This part of the bible annoys me, and was always that one section that I just cannot fathom, becuase in THIS sense I don't see what the benefits are of a woman getting married if she can't participate in decisions and anything the husband decides, it's what he says goes. So, really, none of this applies to me becuase I don't plan to be a wife for this is one of the reasons. But Yeah, sucks, no equality.

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  • I agree with this post.

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  • You're going off of a book? You should treat each other equally. Have respect for one another and be faithful to each other.

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  • What I find interesting is the indignation some posters are responding with , insisting it's naziesque to suggest a man submit to his wife... The original message is for Wonen to submit to their husbands... And this is not a problem to them.

    It's ine thing if they were just correcting the text. But to correct it on the basis of feminist conspiracy. Well what's the conspiracy then in the original text. Since according to them Submission supposedly denotes conspiracy.

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    • & I literally provided evidence of what the Bible said haha

  • I still prefer equality sorry and religion scares me, the bible also said rape victims should be forced to marry their rapists. I don't want any part of it.

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  • You need a book to tell you that? Not trying to hate or anything but the golden rule was around way before the bible and is akin to common sense.

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    • 3mo

      Where do you think the golden rule came from?

      "So whatever you wish that others would do to you, do also to them, for this is the Law and the Prophets."
      -Matthew 7:12

  • I agree with Matthew 20:28.

    http://i.imgur.com/qvmTjCy.jpg?1

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  • Geez, do you really need a bible to tell you to be a decent human being? A marriage is an equal, two-sided effort. I don't see why it's such a complicated issue.

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    • agreed. Romans 7:22, 23
      22 I really delight in the law of God according to the man I am within, 23 but I see in my body another law warring against the law of my mind and leading me captive to sin’s law that is in my body. like teens. how many teens do you know have woken up and say: i think i'll be a drug addict today? or: i think i'll get pregnant today?

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    • Right but your definition of a good person may not be the same for someone else, you get what im saying? Its a construct. Anyway, like i said god already put that moral aspect in all of us so we are expected to be kind to eachother no matter our beleifs after all we have freedom of will

    • The bible doesn't ask use to serve our spouses brainlessly, but to serve with equality, respectfulness, and honor. We aren't asked to be puppets, but to love your spouse and to think of them when making decisions that will affect both parties.

  • It's similar to how a king rules his nation. He is there to make the beat decisions to benefit the kingdom. I agree with you that men will be the head but will sacrifice to do what is right to serve the marriage while women will respect and also sacrifice. Really, it's a mutual thing.. It takes two to make marriage work.

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  • Biblically speaking wives are meant to honour and obey.

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    • Hope you don't mind me elaborating upon your statement. The bible asks us to honor, and obey in the sense to respect your spouse. Love them, cherish them, and to be selfless. This isn't to mean being a puppet, but to reason with your spouse for an equal partnership. The husband is held to the same standard as well. No one in the relationship is greater than the next.

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    • Yes, obey to love, and honor one another. Exactly :) Glad we both understand each other.

      Ephesians 5:21 - Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

    • @krash2002 only the woman says honour and obey.

  • Yea , this ist true. You treat your wife well and you will have a loyal woman. i heard a pastor once say that if your wife isn't having sex with you its because you aren't doing what you need to be doing as a husband.

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  • We need less arguing over who is supposed to get served and more about how we can serve.

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  • Every leader ever either serves those they lead, or they are a bad leader. You cannot take charge of anything in this world, without taking responsibility for it as well. A man who leads his wife is also responsible for her happiness and well being. To warrant that kind of surrender, he better care about her as much as he cares about himself.

    That's what "he is her servant" means. It doesn't mean she is given authority at any point.

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  • wait people still care about the bible and religion?

    it's been 2,000 years guys, time to let go

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    • Actually there are far more people who do believe than the much lower percentage of people who don't... but you must have known that, 'cause you know, science and all.

    • ahh its more like 2300 -2500 years ago

    • and it still rings true today. 2 Timothy 3:1-7: But know this, that in the last days+ critical times hard to deal with will be here. 2 For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, haughty, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, disloyal, 3 having no natural affection, not open to any agreement, slanderers, without self-control, fierce, without love of goodness, 4 betrayers, headstrong, puffed up with pride, lovers of pleasures rather than lovers of God, 5 having an appearance of godliness but proving false to its power;+ and from these turn away. 6 From among these arise men who slyly work their way into households and captivate weak women loaded down with sins, led by various desires, 7 always learning and yet never able to come to an accurate knowledge of truth. sound familiar?

  • I see what you did there :D

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  • I'm not religious and I believe in equality, so no.

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  • I'm still not drinking the biblical marriage kool aid.

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  • ya and if men and women don't follow these rules, they'll be zapped by the magic man in the sky

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