As of last week, gay marriage became legal in all states of the USA. This community, as much as every other on the Internet, blew up. People from both sides arguing and complaining and calling each other idiots, and making insults, etc. I'm kinda included in this.
However, if there's one thing I've ever learned, is that when it comes to religion, politics, or homosexuality, discussions like this, especially online, are a huge waste of time. You are never ever ever going to change someone's mind, not even in a million years.
For both sides, the situation looks like this:
In my whole life I always defended that one should think for himself, and not think a certain way just because "That's what my parents taught me" or "Well there are 4.5 billion people in the world who think this way so they must be right". I also defend people standing their ground and their believes, and defending them when attacked.
However, this must be done ON THE REAL WORLD. Not on a virtual world where you can't even see the person. You can think you are changing something, but in reality you are not. You're just sitting there typing bottons. The other person will read, roll their eyes, and insult you. Now you are both mad and the situation is the same. If you were having this conversation on a coffee shop, things would be much different.
If you defend something, stand your ground. But stand it the right way. Don't sit in front of a computer screen typing words and thinking you are changing the world, or even how the other person thinks. Get out there. Are you pro-gay? Go to the gay parade and show your support. Are you anti-gay? Then don't show your support. Or make a petition. JUST DO SOMETHING.
This applies to religion too, since these are the topics that often generate more heat inside of this community.
One word of advice about this whole deal though, and I've talked about this before: Nobody cares if you're offended.
Lots of people, especially anti-gay may I add, are saying "Aww but this hurts me. It's not right. It's offensive. I'm offended and I have rights". Honestly, nobody cares if you're offended. Literally. People will laugh at you if you are against marriage because it offends you.
For crying out loud, what would you do if your 15 year-old son came home and said "Dad, dad, please help me. My teacher said I'm not the best student in the class and now I'm offended. What do I do?". You know what you do? YOU DEAL WITH IT. I would never admit this kind of behavior from a 15 year-old, and what I see in this community are tons of adults who are offended and the only way they can deal with it is whining and complaining and throwing insults back and forth. You were offended. It happens to everyone, everyday. GET OVER IT.
In the end you just have to accept you are not changing anyone's opinion, especially not online. The only you could ever do this is with proven facts. If we could isolate the Gay Gene and insert it in a straight mouse and mouse stopped being straight, that's when right and wrong came into the picture. After that, even if someone came ahead and said "I think being gay is a choice", then they would be wrong. Until science is silent about this, you just have to accept the facts.
The facts are that, whether you like it or not, gay people can get married. Whether you like it or not, the atheist population is growing and politics are slowly adapting and taking it out of the State. And there's nothing you can do about it. It's that simple.