So, I am always at my favorite bar, and it happens to be a gay bar. I'm friends with most of the bartenders, the manager, the DJs and many patrons.
Last night/this morning I was seriously offended when another patron actually asked the bartender to make me move. But it wasn't that he asked that, it was why and how.
He did not ask me directly, first of all. And second, he called me an it. I came in, as I usually do, said hi to Herbie, the bartender on duty, and went to the fireplace and my usual stool, right near the DJ booth. I took out my phone and started browsing Facebook.
The guy had the temerity to ask Herbie to make "it" move to a different seat, and poor Herbie just didn't know what to say. Herbie, mind you, is transgender, and wants to do hormone therapy. He feels more in tune with his feminine, and makes a gorgeous woman. So this approach was offensive to both of us.
When my friend Auryn came over, and we started talking, the rude guy says "oh, you really are a woman. I'm sorry."
First things first, what the hell does it matter if I have a penis or a vagina? Second, so what if some people feel more comfortable being someone else, and third, if you have something to say, then say it. Don't dance circles.
It just pisses me off that a guy -a gay guy- is so intolerant towards someone perceived different without even knowing the real facts. I'm all woman, born that way. Other people like Herbie are born male but don't want it that way, so they do something about it. That he assumed I was something icky pisses me off. Just because I wear braids, loose clothing, and don't say hi before sitting down in a public bar, doesn't automatically mean I'm something to be dismissed from your worldview. And the fact that he asked the very person doing what he assumed I was doing is the worst...the transgender bartender is not going to move an everyday patron because you have a problem with a supposedly (but not really) transgender person minding her business.
Its amazing how sometimes the very people being shunned for their life choice shun others for that same life choice. Hypocrite, much?